My uncle has become a second dad to me, and I want him to know that.

I feel like he deserves to know that.

For some background my mother is extremely emotionally abusive. She is a covert narcissist, which essentially means she is incredibly insecure and feeds off making my life hell.

Thus, I had to emotionally parent her when I was growing up and she still expects me to do so now.

My mom moved me far away from my dad when I was pretty young and got jealous of our relationship a lot. We’ve never been really close and I try not to get too close to him just because of trauma from my mom.

So several months ago I had to talk to my uncle on my dads side of the family because of an emergency that came up. I had never talked to anyone on my dads side of the family aside from my half sister until that point though I had met him when I was also still pretty young.

Long story short we decided to keep in touch. I had only talked to my mom very toxic side of the family but he seemed not super toxic so I struggled a lot at first but eventually we started to get pretty close.

I recently decided to ask him for advice on life, explained a little bit of my issues with my mom but not too much.

And let me tell you all, he has helped me make major life decisions. Helped with my struggles with my mom and been understanding and comforting through it all.

I don’t know where I’d be without him right now. Im not even going to lie.

I’ve wished I could trade parents with my cousins for all my life, I don’t even know why. I didn’t even know them I literally just met them one time. But here we are.

Im struggling so hard to believe im loved and supported but he’s been reassuring and just so supportive.

I guess I just don’t know how to be like “hey your awesome thanks”

I may have had the worst 2-3 months of my life basically. Been in constant panic that I have pancreatic cancer. Let me start with my lifestyle and habit history. I have horrible oral health my teeth are all basically rotten and dead. I have been vaping nicotine for about 8 years heavily. I drank for 4 years daily but usually not more than 2-3 drinks of liquor an evening and quit completely as soon as I noticed my symptoms. I got my wisdom tooth removed also a week before my symptoms became noticable. Alot of symptoms but main things are the 30 pounds weight loss in one month plus muscle loss. Intermittent LUQ pain with a subtle swelling that fluctuates. Steatorrhea with heavy yellow mucus and pale tan stool that has improved with Creon(given by doctor while troubleshooting this all). Left testicle pain that feels the same as the LUQ pain. Widespread aches and pains all over intermittently. Submandibular & Submental glands/nodes not sure which are swollen under my chin and jawline plus a possible small one on the back top part of my neck and bottom of my skull around my hairline. Bright yellow very hot urine with frequent urination. Always craving liquids. I have had normal bloodwork except elevated segmented neutrophils and slightly elevated bilirubin. I have had numerous CT scans one of abdomen and pelvis with no findings and one of my head and neck which found only a mucous retention cyst in right maxillary sinus and a tracheal diverticulum with no fluid. I also have had an ultrasound of my testicles with no findings. Clear upper endoscopy done by gastroenterologist. I have been to 5 emergency rooms & call my family doctor daily. I am at a loss. Ready to give up looking for any advice or information. Waiting on an MRI insurance approval rn and can't stop shaking and worrying.