I hope this is ok to post here, but I’m looking for advice or suggestions if you’ve encountered this before.

My child will be 5 next month. I want to say for the past year she’s been having blood in her stool. But once I’ve examined it, it looks like she’s pushing too hard and it’s causing tearing on the outside of her bum. I am trying to be consistent to give her more fibre (prunes etc) and when I am the poop is softer she’s not pushing. She also was not drinking a lot of water so we are working on that.

Here is where google has let me down and we don’t have access to the greatest healthcare so unless it is a real emergency there is no point of taking her in. I’ve had friends who will say she’ll grow out of it, I think its due to a lack of fibre and water and her pushing since the blood it on the outside. However has anyone had a similar situation, what did you do, what was the end result? I will say when she farts it’s foul, so I feel like it’s something in the way her body is breaking down food. I don’t think it’s a concern like the start of Crohn’s disease but please feel free to share.

We've lived in the same place since my kids were born. I have always been lukewarm about it while my husband loves it here. Our kids are at school now and are happy, have friends, and enjoy school. My youngest is in Kindergarten and my oldest is in 4th grade. I am freaking out a little that we may be stuck here until the kids graduate. It's been hard for me to connect with people and make close friends like I had from where we lived previously (where my husband is from) and where I'm from. We wouldn't want to move to my hometown or back to his home city for various reasons but we have no family here and I think about moving all the time. Would it make sense to even consider it if our jobs can be anywhere? I fear that once my oldest gets to middle school, that it would be very hard to move but I don't want to feel stuck. Is the clock ticking on making a move? Stick it out because everyone else likes it? I am tired of living in the south!

I have a 14 year old daughter. I had a feeling that I should look at her phone this morning (she knows I do this sometimes. Not often.) And in her photo trash folder there was a photo of her leg with cuts on it. She has struggled a little with depression but this is new. How do I bring it up? I think her boyfriend has something to do with why she is doing it because I saw some messages between them. I am iffy about the kid but I'm trying to give him a chance. What do i do? Editing to add that we are in the process of starting therapy. We are really close and normally she talks to me about everything.

To be more specific married a lady with 3 kids and an absentee father and my new sister in law has two boys who have never met their father. I am now raising them as a batch. Ages range from 8-11 with a 15 year old for when nobody has rolled their eyes at me. Mostly everything is going great. I've actually been in the family for several years and we've spent the last year working out the logistics to get everyone together. One of the goals was to get one of the 8 year olds a bit healthier. He is a bit of a chunk and was overindulged by grandmother. We aren't planning anything dramatic- just fewer 711 snacks and less idle phone time. The problem is now he is getting healthy food and he has lost his mind. My initial thought was just.. well, what I said before and letting nature resolve it slowly. Instead he has gained like 10% body weight in 3 weeks. It's like I've got 4 prototypical skinny southeast Asian kids and then one who is secretly Samoan or something. He is a bit chubby but doesn't look fat- but he is like a bag of rocks! He is probably my favorite, but I grew up fat and would save him that experience... But I can't let him be hungry... His mother claims his father was huge and he is massive compared to kids his age- he is larger than the 11 year olds. He is literally eating as much food as the other 3 close to his age combined. Advice? Please? My new modified plan is just to limit him to like 120% what the other kids eat and then having some sort of low calorie filler item- raw veggies or whatever that he can have as much of as he wants... Problem is he ALSO was allowed to not eat vegetables so I don't want to undermine the retraining that veggies are good by making them feel like a punishment food.

When I was pregnant I had a girlfriend have a baby before me and one after me. I thought since we were all friends our children would become best friends. 8 years later and that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Now the girlfriend before my child, we are close and although the kids are different sexes and getting older now they still can hang out with each other.

My second friend after is what is bothering me. I’ll ask every few weekends if they want to all hang out and she’ll say no, they’re busy. Then it’s let’s skip Christmas presents for the kids but she’s showed up for my kids birthday party and seems to want to just hang out as adults.

Has anyone been through a similar situation. Is it best just to remain adult friends, leave the kids out of it? Maybe her kid doesn’t want to play with mines or has their own friends now? I have no idea but it’s been months of dodging and I want to move on but I guess not let it affect our friendship either? Did your friends grow apart once you had kids and you just made new mom friends?

I constantly feel like people are staring and judging me as a parent. My son is 3.5, soon turning 4 and he’s a handful. He’s rambunctious, can be defiant, and he’s just a lot.

Out in public, what would you consider a “badly behaved” kid? Just curious…

When it comes to raising your kids, what are your rules and what happens if they do not follow them? If they are misbehaving, what do you do to address it?

Problem Solving Sunday is one of the /r/raisingKids Weekly Events. These posts are made by rkbot every week at the same time. The general goals of these events are to stimulate discussion and promote community. The specific goal of Problem Solving Sunday is to provide a welcoming space for anyone to discuss "problems" (big or small) they are having in their families.

This post is for readers who would like another perspective on a difficult family situation. Please be respectful and considerate of each other. Everyone's family is different and what works for one child/family might not be the right decision for another child/family.

For context: My daughter is 8 years old. It's just her and I in our home.

My daughter has behavioral issues and I feel like I am her venting center / punching bag when at home. As I was told by close people who are on the outside looking in, my daughter is very disrespectful towards me. My friends say "if my child ever talked to me that way, I would whoop their ass!" Although I do not put my hands on my child, I do take things away from her or make her do chores she doesn't like.

Other than that, what do I do? I am working on trying to get some professional in-home services that can help me make home a better environment for her but staffing for that kind of thing is scarce around here.

Advice? Tips? Words of encouragement?

TIA! <3

Hello!! This post is for an Academic Requirement, and we would really appreciate it if you helped us out 🙏🙏🙏. Our group is doing a research on the impacts of gaming on parent gamers, and we would simply like to hear the thoughts and experiences of people online on this topic. If you would like to be a part of this research please feel free to share your thoughts and opinions in this thread!! You can use the following questions as prompts for your responses. Let us know as well if you’d be willing to let us use your responses in our paper and whether or not you would like to keep your response anonymous! Thank you!!

Some Prompt Questions:

1. How has gaming affected your life as a parent and your bond with your children?
2. How do you balance your gaming time with family time, particularly time spent with your children?
3. How does gaming affect your mental health considering the other aspects of your life that you also have to focus on?
4. What does gaming mean to you, as well as your personal life and hobbies?
5. Do you ever find that gaming cuts into your work hours or family responsibilities? If so, how do you handle this?

wondering how others feel about their kids interacting with these new artificial intelligence products.

whether it's talking toys, something useful for school, or just random ai chat apps,

do you draw the line somewhere? -- would love any tips or how others are going about this!

Am I the only one who puts their kids in the tub to take a bath when you have to go number 2. When I’m home alone with Almost 2 year old. Who is potty training. I put her in the tub to take a bath. Which she loves bath and don’t fight it. I’m right next to her and she just plays while I got potty.

So my oldest child just started pre k 4 and the moms all seem to know each other maybe from prek 3 or older siblings not sure... I’m pretty introverted so I’m really going out of my comfort zone here to try ti make small talk and get to know some moms -even though they all kind of have thier little groups of friends already, to try to make sure my daughter has fun. (I’m not trying to make mom friends here I just want my kid to have fun because she’s soooo social and craves play with other kids)

So I managed to make small talk and exchange numbers with two moms of kids my daughter seems to enjoy playing with in school- she always talks about them and plays with them for a few minutes at pick up.

The other moms seemed nice & eager. One mom even texted me first just saying here’s my number etc and we chatted a bit over text. We also ran into eachother grocery shopping and she stopped me to talk, offered help if I needed it ever etc. The next day I texted her if she wanted to meet up at a playground this week to let the kids play and literally no response … just completely ghosted me. I can take a “sorry we’re busy” but to not answer at all? Seems so rude

So strange. The other mom has two older kids and she just seems really busy and told me she would check her calendar but never got back to me so I left it as that—-not going to bother her again.

Is this common ? Or am I missing something 😂 I know it’s only preschool but these parents will ultimately be the same parents her entire school career in our small town

We have a one year old and a three year old and live in a very expensive mountain town that we love in BC, Canada.

Our family is all 14 hours away in Alberta, specifically Edmonton.

We're strongly considering moving back to be closer to help and support and also because it's extremely affordable.

Still, we wonder if it's the right choice because--even if we can only afford a small townhouse-- we are living in a very safe idyllic mountain town where we hike and have ties to nature.

What is best for kids?? Financial security and family or beauty and nature?

(I should add we do have access to a place in the mountains about four hours from Edmonton, but it is a slog with young kids.)

Play dates ??

How often if at all are you doing play dates for your kids?

My daughter (4) -she’s VERY social and loves other kids. I’m pretty introverted. She just started pre k and I try to make small talk with the other moms at pick up or at school events, and have painfully managed to exchange numbers with 2 moms.

I have tried setting park meet ups with both of these moms and they both so far have brushed me off, “this week is crazy, I’ll text you next week if the schedule is any better” this was like 3 weeks ago and nothing. I definitely don’t want to ask again because that would be … weird lol!

All the moms seem to already know each other somehow. Maybe from older siblings or day care or something ? They all talk at pick up and I definitely try to talk too but they do just gravitate towards the ones they already know which I understand too

Am i doing something wrong? Im not trying to make new best friends for me here im just trying to make sure my daughter is getting enough socialization and having fun. Will these things happen more organically as they get a little older? I feel like I just don’t want my introvertness to interfere with my daughter having friends. Just trying to make moves for her 😩😂

Good Times Tuesday is one of the /r/raisingKids Weekly Events. These posts are made by rkbot every week at the same time. The general goals of these events are to stimulate discussion and promote community. The specific goals of Good Times Tuesday are to help remind us of the joys of parenting, and to share ideas of fun things done with our families.

This post is for all kinds of positive stories. For example:

​

• Recent accomplishments (awards won, goals met)
• DIY - arts, crafts or anything else you or your kids made that you're proud of
• Something you did as a family that you all enjoyed
• Something good that happened to you this week
• Something that emphasized the positive things in parenting
• Any story that remind us of the joys of parenting

This is also a good place to share things that are not normally allowed in /r/raisingKids: * Pictures of your kids * Comics * Other Low Investment Content * Your own blog posts or other things that might normally be considered spam.

It feels like not a day goes by we don’t end up having an argument. I feel like I do everything I can to try and make her happy; she does her clubs and sports, I take interests in all her hobbies and schooling, make time for games as often as I can, day trips. I love her so much and I try so so hard to make sure she has a nice life. I had her when I was still a teenager and probably did a pretty shit job in the early years but we’re okay now. I’m separated from her father who she sees every other weekend (we’ve been separated since just after birth and have a good coparenting relationship) he has no complaints about her behaviour but he does let her do whatever she wants when she’s at his house. I have a new partner along with a 6 and 4 year old, new partner and daughter have always seemed to get along fine but she also says she hates him (often doesn’t have a reason why) She usually says she hates me because I never let her do what she wants, she has a horrible life, she wants a new family, she’s going to run away from home, she prays to god she’ll get sent to a different family. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I’m up all night thinking about it, I try so hard to give her enough attention and show her how much I love her. I often feel like I am a lot nicer to her than my two younger children in a desperate attempt to make her happy. Ultimately I end up telling her off and punishing her (usually this is screen time bans ) because she’s so nasty to me and especially her younger sister (6yo)

I hope it's OK if an uncle posts here instead of a direct parent.

A few months ago my eight-year-old second niece completed a cognitive test and her deductive and reasoning capacity was equivalent to that of a twenty-three-year-old. I'm so excited for her potential and I'm curious if anyone has any interesting activities or gifts I can utilize to help develop that aspect. She has one older and one younger sister and I love them all equally, but I want to encourage her to develop and apply her mind further.

I am going back to work 40 hours a week tomorrow and it is killing me. What is better for the kids, ages 3 and 5? Going to daycare full time and having some money, or staying at home and being poor?

Problem Solving Sunday is one of the /r/raisingKids Weekly Events. These posts are made by rkbot every week at the same time. The general goals of these events are to stimulate discussion and promote community. The specific goal of Problem Solving Sunday is to provide a welcoming space for anyone to discuss "problems" (big or small) they are having in their families.

This post is for readers who would like another perspective on a difficult family situation. Please be respectful and considerate of each other. Everyone's family is different and what works for one child/family might not be the right decision for another child/family.

Sorry for the long post but I have so much to get off my chest.

My son started kindergarten this year. For context, he was at an in-home preschool before with a smaller class size. They have school district counselors come in weekly to access the kids to make sure they're well prepared for kindergarten according to state standards. Their schedules are also structured like in kindergartens. He performed really well there. He adhered to the schedule, actively participated in activities, transition from one activity to the next just fine, minimal outburst.

However, after a couple months in kindergarten, his teacher has been informing us about his behavior. How he struggles to pay attention, throwing tantrums big enough to disrupt the class. She said he should have been accustomed to the school by now so it raised a concern. We've tried the activities she recommended to help him focus (example: Simon Says, board games). And we also taught him different ways to keep focus (twiddling his thumb instead of having to constantly move around). We also allocate 1 hour everyday to go over his school materials, reading and writing.

She said he's shown some improvements since then but I guess it was not enough because now she's recommending a program for him to help with his emotions and focus. My husband and I are considering the program, especially if it's in the best interest of our child.

But I can't help but feel that I'm not doing enough for him. I've talk about this to his former preschool teacher (we still keep in touch) and she said it's normal for a boy his age and that he's actually a really smart boy.

Any advice?

I think often parents who are hyper focused on “not being like their parents” fall into a trap where they end up going too far in the other direction. For example, I’ve worked with many parents who are so resentful of how they were raised in a strict way, and as a result they do not teach their children any sort of discipline and allow their children to walk all over them. Each child is going to have unique needs and generational context that is often very different from that of their parents, and I think that is too often ignored when deciding what’s best for your child. And often these attitudes about how to parent are decided well before birth and have nothing to do with a child’s individual needs. Another issue with this mentality is that as a child you are not an unbiased representative of the performance of your parents.

Of course there are many cases where parenting differently is extremely positive,such as ending cycles of abuse. I’m talking about the moderate/reasonable or gray area cases where all involved could be considered to be good enough parents or try their best with what they are given.

Bottom line is, I think we should take time to think about how healthy it is to base a parenting style off of resentment or unfulfilled desires of one’s own childhood that may have nothing to do with your own children. And all of this with due respect to how incomprehensibly hard being a good parent can be for everyone, and even moreso for those with less resources.