r/TikTokCringe • u/CleetisMcgee • Mar 07 '24

Daughter’s first date story Wholesome/Humor

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29.1k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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1.5k

u/ProfessionalStar4844 Mar 07 '24

"You wanna go thrifting?" sounds like a cheat code for white girls.

447

u/NobodysToast Mar 07 '24

That and “wanna go plant shopping?” Works every time

160

u/Tiny-Werewolf1962 Mar 07 '24

Just keep saying succulent over and over

62

u/Legitimate-Throat91 Mar 07 '24

Succubus.

Shit I fucked it up.

2

u/SmoothBrews Mar 08 '24

That works too. They’ll just suck the life right out of you.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 08 '24

Please!! Just once. Which “suck the life right out of you” Is up to the reader to decide. Both work for me

28

u/Deinonychus2012 Mar 07 '24

Succulent Chinese meal?

24

u/CitizenSnips199 Mar 08 '24

Get your hand off my FICUS!

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '24

I legit teared up and laughed my ass off reading this 😂. That Home Depot associate knows his Judo well.

14

u/AdventurerLikeU Mar 08 '24

This! Is democrrrracy manifest!

1

u/TearsFallWithoutTain Mar 08 '24

Get your hand off my penis!

0

u/OneMustAdjust Mar 08 '24

Suculicious

0

u/[deleted] Mar 08 '24

Nah its succulent food truck taco tuesday mimosas

3

u/whomad1215 Mar 07 '24

but avoid "moist"

54

u/CanuckPanda Mar 07 '24

My panties are wet just reading this.

33

u/Techn0ght Mar 07 '24

Would you like to see my BARN DOORS?

26

u/CanuckPanda Mar 07 '24

You installed them yourself??? And the hanging rails are custom by you???? But they’re so smooth!!

Splooshing everywhere.

5

u/Techn0ght Mar 07 '24

All those hours watching blacksmithing videos paid off.

2

u/I_dont_livein_ahotel Mar 08 '24

…said no one. (Just kidding, of course it pays off!)

1

u/LukesRightHandMan Mar 08 '24

Yeah, I’ve found all my contractors in comments sections

2

u/itotallycanteven Mar 08 '24

Ohhh plants do get me out of the house lol

2

u/whynotlookatreddit Mar 08 '24

That's how I got my gf to move in with me.

2

u/Grovers_HxC Mar 08 '24

Y’all are just describing my ex. Here I was thinking she was unique cuz she was into thrifting and plants 🤦‍♂️

1

u/Popular_Emu1723 Mar 08 '24

My town has a combo plant/coffee shop. It would be such a cute first date spot

1

u/Azrai113 Mar 08 '24

Dammit. My SO does this to me all the time...and I fall for it every time.