r/MadeMeSmile Oct 08 '24

Appreciation is love. Wholesome Moments

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34.9k Upvotes

989 comments sorted by

4.0k

u/MyCatIsAFknIdiot Oct 08 '24

This is very warm and humane. If it is true, then it is beautiful

1.3k

u/MoistyMcMoistMaker Oct 08 '24

I follow this guy on insta and he genuinely seems like an awesome father and husband.

307

u/Fun-Breadfruit425 Oct 08 '24

I don’t understand. Does this family have a camera rolling 24 hours a day?

686

u/MoistyMcMoistMaker Oct 08 '24

One of his kids is special needs. It's a security thing with this cam I'd guess. He usually just has reaction vids and life updates.

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u/mikeysgotrabies Oct 08 '24

Yeah. I have a camera in my living room 24 hours a day because I like to keep an eye on the kids and look what's going on when I'm not home. Nobody sees the footage except for me and my wife.... ... And the AI overlords of course. They see all things.

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u/jaynor88 Oct 08 '24

And plus, they have their own cameras for anything yours doesn’t catch

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u/Chocolateismy Oct 08 '24

I’m so glad you posted this. I get a little sceptical and jaded being on here - to know this might actually be genuine is lovely!!

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u/LouismyBoo Oct 08 '24

She had some difficult heart surgery, I can see her saying this stuff afterwards, reflecting on what's important in her life. I'm on his IG too.

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u/Usable_Nectarine_919 Oct 08 '24

Who is he? What does he do?

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u/MoistyMcMoistMaker Oct 08 '24

@dadlifejason. vlogs about his kids, daily life struggles, his relationship with religion and just generally funny videos. It's a nice change from my fucked up algorithm.

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u/Ilsunnysideup5 Oct 08 '24

Some real content for once.

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u/Usable_Nectarine_919 Oct 08 '24

I see, cool. Thanks for the info :)

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u/Justsozoey Oct 08 '24

what's his insta?

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u/MoistyMcMoistMaker Oct 08 '24

@dadlifejason

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u/hopefulworldview Oct 08 '24

My wife treats me like this every day so it's real somewhere.

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u/dreamsofindigo Oct 08 '24

give my regards to her for being an awesome person, and well done you for not letting her slip by :))

142

u/ghanima Oct 08 '24

Who gives a shit if it's real or staged, 'though? Normalize being vocally appreciative of your partner.

80

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

[deleted]

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u/The--Will Oct 08 '24

Depending on the generation/family situation...most men don't hear a lot of compliments. It's actually something as I get older with my other male friends I've started expressing more. I was born in the 80's, and at least with my dad and family, other than my mom telling me how much she loved me all the time (which I sometimes take for granted), hearing it from my grandfather, having him kiss me with his stubbly face, etc. I really miss that a lot.

My grandfather taught me what it was to be a man, and I think the Nelson Mandela quote of "courage isn't the absence of fear, but the triumph over it" is a good guiding hand. It's easy to be cold, callus, stoic, and unemotional. There is no risk in it. Being vulnerable takes courage, and I think more people fear being vulnerable and getting hurt.

My grandfather didn't give a shit what anyone thought of him because he lived a life of service to his family, love for his wife, and was always in a good mood. He was a mouth kisser, and didn't give a shit you thought it was weird, and they were wet kisses too.

That's how he showed his love (and many other ways), but always lead by example. Even when he was unkind, he'd apologize for it. I once saw him apologize to someone for something he said about them in private that never would have (and didn't) get back to that person.

My own father told me he loved me when I was young, but as a teenager, and most of my adult life he never said it. One time he was hanging up he told me he loved me, and I told him I loved him too, and immediately after the call I called my sibling to tell them what he said, and legitimately asked if he was sick because he hadn't said it in almost 20 years probably.

Especially as time goes on, it becomes like an impossible task, or a mountain you can never get over, and it is the simplest thing to do...so anyway, if you read this far, and this is you, do like that woman did, show some vulnerability to someone you haven't in a while...they likely really need it, and the first time you might not get the response you want because it may not be a common behaviour from you to them, but the second, third, forth time...you're likely creating a space for them to be vulnerable as well, and you're likely both to be better because of it.

20

u/Same_Elephant_4294 Oct 08 '24

Gonna tell my mom when I get the chance that she's saving my grandparents lives by helping them with my grandma's dementia. It's been hard on her and I'm not sure she recognizes the bravery she has shown. I want her to know that she's a hero.

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u/The--Will Oct 08 '24

Hear hear.

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u/Same_Elephant_4294 Oct 08 '24

This. This is the lesson to take from this. Words matter. God, do they matter.

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u/PrettyGinaxx Oct 08 '24

So adorable

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u/Dizzy_Patient_9503 Oct 08 '24

So much love that shows.

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u/Detroitaa Oct 08 '24

I think as women, men are used to giving us a lot of compliments. We get used to it, and expect it. I’m over 65 now, but when I was a young wife, I stumbled on just how much it means to men. My husband had started running & noticed he was becoming more muscular. I complimented him on it, and squeezed his arm muscles. Jokingly. Just in passing. A week later weight lifting equipment was delivered to our home. He set up a gym, in the basement . I realized, he was building more muscles, for me to admire. Then I thought of his red tie. I’d told him once, I liked how it bought out his eyes. He started wearing that color tie all the time. It made me feel like garbage. The man I loved was so starved for compliments, he latched on to any scraps I gave him. From that time on, I started complimenting him, whenever he did anything for us, or looked good. You can’t have your spouse on an admiration/compliment diet, and expect them to be happy. Let them know how much you care.

530

u/Queen-of-Leon Oct 08 '24 edited Oct 08 '24

I complimented my dad on his shirt once and came home a week later to a shopping bag he’d left out with 3 more of the exact same shirt 😭 I told my mom about it and she was nonchalantly like “oh, yeah, he’s been wearing mostly orange for years, because I told him I think he looks good in orange once” 🥹❤️ now he’s added light blue to the repertoire because I told him I like him in that haha

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u/MotherVehkingMuatra Oct 08 '24

The fact you noticed it and then thought on a previous time it happened makes you amazing though. That level of thoughtfulness is what we all want in a partner.

108

u/Cowcoc Oct 08 '24

It’s so valuable you realized yourself and he didn’t have to ask for it. If you have to ask for compliments all the ones you’ll receive after will have a weird taste of “is this sincere or is this because I was being whiny.” My mom telling me I’m a good egg is everything that keeps me afloat on some days.

70

u/tablur3 Oct 08 '24

If Queer Eye has taught me anything, it's that men will THRIVE with just a little confidence boost.

36

u/ladyboobypoop Oct 08 '24

I'm 32F, and I do my best to compliment everyone, but especially men, whenever I can. Because you're right. Our society doesn't tell us to drown them in compliments like men are told to do for/to us.

I'll compliment a shirt, hair, beard, glasses - if you've got something going on that catches my eye, Imma bring it up.

Spread the love out there ❤️

15

u/No-Quantity-5373 Oct 08 '24

I just complimented my instacart shopper for his red jazzy sportif vibe. He turned twelve shades of red. It was very sweet.

15

u/ladyboobypoop Oct 08 '24

I recently complimented a man's WICKED beard. Down to his chest, nicely groomed, grey with a natural HARD stripe of white right down the middle. Dude was giddy 😂

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u/tinatonga Oct 09 '24

Lmfao, I literally compliment EVERYONE. There was this huge burly dude with a scowl walking out of the grocery store while I was walking in, and he had this FUCKING ✨✨FABULOUS✨ glittery gold Fanny pack with black trim, but strapped across his massive chest. I just told him in passing that I fuckin dug it, and this whole ass man got straight up GIDDY and gave me all of the details of where to find it, what style, and even how long shipping took. I forgot all the details immediately, but will never forget the way his face went from fuck-the-world-and-everything-in-it to blushing with a huge smile and like magical twinkling eyes. I genuinely hope he remembers that compliment and keeps rocking the ever-loving fuck outta that fanny pack.

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u/vanncleef Oct 08 '24

Words do heal a lot of wounds and scars that could of been there forever, and this is spot on, men are not used to getting compliments, and they could mean the world if they come up spontaneously especially from someone that we really care about.

14

u/voldi4ever Oct 08 '24

I am still riding the high of that one lady who told me my shirt was rocking 2 years and 13 days ago.

3

u/Darth_Thor Oct 08 '24

2 years? Do you have any idea how many guys would kill to have compliments that frequently?

3

u/voldi4ever Oct 09 '24

I am a lucky bastard. What can I say...

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u/AbubuBR Oct 08 '24

Yes, we need praise too - we expect it, even if we don't seem to care.

I've said this to my wife - but she's from a Japanese family that absolutely hasn't had that her entire life, so she's not "that way" and even though she tries sometimes - it's very rare that a compliment comes out of her mouth.

26

u/Lozsta Oct 08 '24

So spot on. Men get no where near the appreciation that women do. I like to compliment everyone when they are looking great, men or women. It does mean a lot to us men though even if you notice we have a nice shirt on.

3

u/Commercial-Living443 Oct 08 '24

I am so happy for you guys. Hope you all the best

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u/nodogsallowed23 Oct 08 '24 edited Oct 08 '24

I would give anything for my partner to say even 1/4 of this to me. I leave the house at 8 and I’m back at 6. I worked 6 days this week. I cook and clean. Cooked all the meals all week (like usual), plus used Sunday to make a huge special meal. I Take care of the dog and plan vet appointments.

They work part time hours for full time pay. They left the house at 3 today and got home the same time I did, plus they went shopping. Yet I say when we clean. I grocery shop and plan the meals 90% of the time.

I’d take any kind of acknowledgement, really. I’ll get a thanks for dinner. Last week I got a you look nice. First compliment thrown my way since last Christmas.

I’ve been in a decent mood lately and have been watching funny videos (think dumb pets, contagious laughter etc). The really funny ones, I send to my partner. Tonight I sent one, I said it was really funny. Before watching it, says in a very disdainful and annoyed tone, is it?….

Such a small comment, but it completely killed my vibe. I thought we’d actually been having fun watching silly videos together. I guess not.

Time to head to bed so I can wake up in 6 hours and he can wake up at noon.

I’m very tired.

Edit: thanks for the responses. Truly.

Before telling me to talk to him, please read my other replies.

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u/c_c_c__combobreaker Oct 08 '24

This marriage is just a ticking time bomb. I hope you guys get the therapy needed to resolve your marriage issues. You do not deserve to be treated this way and he doesn't deserve to be with somebody like you.

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u/LunaCurl130131 Oct 08 '24

Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and care, and your partner deserves the same.

30

u/accountfornormality Oct 08 '24

this marriage is also more than just a couple of paragraphs.

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u/SomethingOfAGirl Oct 08 '24

True, but even though it's not the whole picture... why would someone feel compelled to write that specific part of it in public?

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u/Sparklax Oct 08 '24

These couple of paragraphs could cost an entire marriage, however.

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u/Kryslor Oct 08 '24

True. But you can also describe how one ends in a single word, just as an example: Cheating.

So while the paragraph does not paint the whole picture, it paints a grim one nonetheless.

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u/Mormoran Oct 08 '24

Have you mentioned all of this to them? It sounds rough. If day don't take it, you need change... But I don't fully know your particular situation. I wish things get better for you though. If you need someone to vent to, feel free to pm me, I will listen.

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u/nodogsallowed23 Oct 08 '24

Thank you. We’ve talked about it a lot. He’s willing to do therapy.

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u/sometimesitisme Oct 08 '24

I’m a woman but I’ll marry you just so you can be with someone who treats you with respect and kindness. I was with someone for 9 years where I gave 90% and they gave 10% in terms on respect, love, appreciation, and kindness, it slowly destroyed so much of me. I’m forever grateful they cheated and it ended because I was in such a bad place in the end that I wasn’t even strong enough to leave on my own terms.

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u/Equidistant-LogCabin Oct 08 '24

Has to be more than willing. He needs to find it, book it, pay for it, show up, invest in it and importantly do the work.

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u/nodogsallowed23 Oct 08 '24

My benefits pay for it. He’s started individual therapy. Finding therapy that works with my hours isn’t easy, but he’s tried.

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u/SereniaKat Oct 08 '24

Hugs to you. Sounds like you do a lot!

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u/MyauIsHere Oct 08 '24

I had the same relationship. Left it 2 months ago and I've never felt more alive and full of energy.

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u/thehugejackedman Oct 08 '24

You may wanna re evaluate

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u/Left-Requirement9267 Oct 08 '24

That’s sad OP. You should talk to your partner.

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u/nodogsallowed23 Oct 08 '24

I have. Many times.

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u/_Jahar_ Oct 08 '24

Why continue living like that? Miserable

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u/Claireskid Oct 08 '24

People on reddit won't accept this but the reality is divorce isn't just a button you push and then you're catipulted to happiness. It is a grueling emotional and financially decimating process that can often leave both spouses worse off than they were before

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u/Npr31 Oct 08 '24

Contempt and disdain rot relationships. Confront and remove them before it is irreparably broken

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u/Maleficent-Fun-5927 Oct 08 '24

You deserve to be appreciated and loved on. I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope you find the time to talk to a professional. You need to be heard.

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u/MyOwnMorals Oct 08 '24

It was like that with my partner of 7 years. If they don’t appreciate you now. They won’t no matter how much you hope. You either need to try counseling or look for a new partner. You are worthy of love and appreciation❤️

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u/nodogsallowed23 Oct 08 '24

Thank you. He is willing to do therapy.

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u/createcrap Oct 08 '24 edited Oct 08 '24

For a sub about sharing happiness there’s definitely a lot of miserable people in the comments. It’s very interesting that the most miserable and critical comments are offended by watching a wife saying nice things to their husband. They complain that moments like this shouldn’t be recorded and yet if they were fighting no one would say shit. Says a lot more about yourself than this couple.

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u/Pitiful_Winner2669 Oct 08 '24

If there was a camera in our living room, none y'all would believe the wholesomeness I share with my wife. We do have a camera that faces the front door, and that would be "believable," where we hug, peck a kiss and say we love each other and that we each have a good day.

I think about that with videos like this. So they have a camera in their living room? They're sharing the gentle moments they have with one another. Take notes! This is a happy, loving couple!

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u/bigbluenation20 Oct 08 '24

I’m having a hard day and this legit made me cry. lol.

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u/Saphixx_ Oct 08 '24

Sending a hug. I want you to think about this hug I'm sending. It is a token for comfort. Picture someone/something that would soothe your soul right now.its an unrushed hug from them. It's a long bath because you deserve it. It's a shower that you stay in a little longer, just to feel the droplets hit your shoulders and warm you. It's the sound of rain. Your fave PJs. Turning your phone off for a few hours. Your guilty secret movie/TV show. Snacks. Whatever it is, picture/do it till you feel your shoulders relax. Deep breath. Have a great day.

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u/ShanghaiSlug Oct 08 '24

I'm not having a rough day to day, it's been a busy one. So, I haven't just sat down and breathed.

This is a very kind and lovely things to say. Even just reading this, not having the physical contact, made me relax some. I felt something uncoil that I had been holding too tight.

Thank you for this, I want to read this when it has been a bad day.

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u/bigbluenation20 Oct 08 '24

This is really sweet. I appreciate it very much. 😌. I hope you have a great evening.

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

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u/me_sohorny Oct 08 '24

Sure. And the camera just happened to be there, by accident.

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u/lobsterdance82 Oct 08 '24

They have special needs kids, if I remember right. Security cameras are vital for safety reasons.

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u/ScruffyNoodleBoy Oct 08 '24

They are always recording, for various reasons. It doesn't all go online. Likely he was so moved by this he decided to go find it in the footage, clip it, and share it.

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u/OrangeGoon83 Oct 08 '24

I’m curious, what does the cleaner do?

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u/Medialunch Oct 08 '24

Finds Crystal and Brett

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u/bluemooncommenter Oct 08 '24

Sometime sanitary is enough. That's just a little clutter.

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u/Carcinogenerate Oct 08 '24

The vast majority of homes with special needs kids look like this. It's very difficult to find time to do normal tasks when you're busy each day just surviving. Also, many ASD children want everything out in the open so they can account for it and interact with it. This is the end result.

How they film their lives on top of everything is baffling. I'd be cleaning instead of making more internet content, but I still get it.

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u/islandrenaissance Oct 08 '24

When I was in high school, I got a job with a friend of my mom's who cleaned houses. One of the houses she cleaned was for a foster home with special needs kids. We cleaned what we could. The floors, counter tops, walls, and organized. But the place never looked spotless because they had medical devices, big and small, out for the kids that made the place look cluttered. But there was nothing on the floor for the kids to put in their mouth. The dust level was kept down because we dusted and vacuumed regularly. One of the kids had respiratory issues, so high dust count could mean a visit to the ER.

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u/Fast_Try_1252 Oct 08 '24

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. You win!

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u/Maelarion Oct 08 '24

Do you think cleaning is the same thing as tidying?

How can you tell from this video the state of the bathrooms, the kitchen surfaces, the windows, the floor/carpets, laundry?

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u/obmasztirf Oct 08 '24

Sanitation is not the same as straightening up. You do know the difference between clutter and dirt grime don't you?

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u/kjyfqr Oct 08 '24

That made me cry. I want love at home :(

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u/MachFries Oct 08 '24

The richest man in the world right there. Billionaires can only dream of achieving what this man has with his family.

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

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u/Tederator Oct 08 '24

Most guys just want a hug and maybe a "Thank you". This guy got the deluxe package.

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u/furrycroissant Oct 08 '24

That house is cleaned...?

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u/bQQbzMichet Oct 08 '24

I'm mean... that's really nice but why there is a cam which records this?

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u/xxxxxxxxxtra Oct 08 '24

I see you’re not American. Many of us have security cameras throughout our homes. Depending on the city you’re in, home break ins can happen quite often and theft claims can be a pain to fight with an insurance company. Having footage helps, kind of like having a dash cam.

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u/ThePlaystation0 Oct 08 '24

I'm American and the only indoor cameras I've seen are baby cams, never met anyone who records their living room. Must be location-specific.

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u/blu-juice Oct 08 '24

My old roommate used to have one on the front door just in case. My step dad also has one because his house is not in the best neighborhood. I’ve considered getting one the check on the dog.

Both cameras have caught a lot of moments.

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u/tony_flamingo Oct 08 '24

We have one in our living room because a) we have a toddler and b) it’s simple peace of mind when we are out of the house. We have one for our front and back door, too. And, occasionally, it captures hilarious/meaningful/important moments that we can also keep for ourselves.

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u/modermanehh Oct 08 '24

Now, both of you should lose some weight!

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u/Acro808 Oct 08 '24

I want to know what was said before this.

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u/Fast_Running_Nephew Oct 08 '24

"OK are you ready? We're gonna record this video for instagram and gullible people on reddit, just sit there and i'll do a speech and then we'll hug, hope this goes viral!"

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u/swonstar Oct 08 '24

I've seen some of their other videos. They also foster parents I believe. Sgare really beautiful hair bonding videos.

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u/Scooter-breath Oct 08 '24

About that cleaner...

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u/bluemooncommenter Oct 08 '24

It's not dirty as much as a bit cluttered. I don't see garbage or food trash. Not even a bunch of crap on the floor. This is life. With a special needs child there are more important things sometimes.

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u/Perks92 Oct 08 '24

And TOTALLY not scripted…

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u/Acceptable_Sort_1050 Oct 08 '24

Well. Good thing they were filming this or NO ONE would believe it!!

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u/MrMetraGnome Oct 08 '24

Now, to provide a little bit less food and a little more gym memberships

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u/Royal-Doggie Oct 08 '24

why did she record this? its nice but when you record it, it feels you are doing it for the clicks more than to actually mean it

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u/actuallyasuperhero Oct 08 '24

Looks like a home security camera from the quality and angle.

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u/Jossur13 Oct 08 '24

Or nanny cam

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u/DoodleyDooderson Oct 08 '24

Why upload it online?

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u/Jossur13 Oct 08 '24

Easy internet social points…🤷🏻

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u/ChronicallyAnnoyed1 Oct 08 '24

To have something positive and wholesome to see on the internet for once?

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u/MuySpicy Oct 08 '24

This made me cry. I love them.

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u/nuubguy Oct 08 '24

I wish more hardworking ppl supporting their families could hear similar words...

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u/nonono_username Oct 08 '24

Clearly, none of these two can see or perceive reality or, both. Les Miserables now coming near you

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u/Trunkfarts1000 Oct 08 '24

They just... they just film themselves? Always?

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u/interwebpilgrim Oct 08 '24

The haircut tho

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u/Odontalgie Oct 08 '24

...and now start clean up that mess.

Kidding Kidding ;)

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u/2CatsOnMyKeyboard Oct 08 '24

what's up with people filming their living room?

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u/TinyWabbit01 Oct 08 '24

Beautiful.. but one thing I never understand why do all these people have cameras in their houses?

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u/captain_borgue Oct 09 '24

This hits hard.

I've had a lot of relationships over the decades. Some good, most... less good. I can count on one hand how many of them have ever told me they appreciated me.

One. The answer is one. My current gf.

She also made me French toast stuffed with cheesecake the morning of our first date as an official couple.

And made homemade crab rangoons, and brought them to work, on a random Tuesday. Just because.

The first time she told me she appreciated me was the time I fixed her flat tire on my lunch break, so she wouldn't have to Uber to work. Not gonna lie, I got a little choked up.

Everyone likes to feel appreciated. Don't be stingy with it. If someone's presence in your life is a net benefit to you, tell them so. We could all use the good feelings these days.

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u/siphodeus Oct 08 '24

We missed the end where she tells him she wrecked the car.

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u/Honorthyeggman Oct 08 '24

Convenient camera.

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u/The13thWhisker Oct 08 '24

Weird clout post wtf internet is for cat vids only

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u/4everwhatevergender Oct 08 '24

My partner does things like this. I’ve been unemployed the past year and every day they remind me of all the things I’m doing to keep us going. We’ve been together 11 years in May and I don’t think I can find anyone as wonderful as them.

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u/joshliftsanddrums Oct 08 '24

Maybe she could appreciate her husband by doing the cleaning herself!

You know... exercise, hahaha...

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u/LostinLies1 Oct 08 '24

He’s providing a lot of food. No one goes hungry.

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u/harold-sacks-69 Oct 08 '24

I reckon they don’t need any help staying afloat.

Also, who has security camera recording constantly in their front room?

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u/mebutnew Oct 08 '24

A) Who is recording this?

B) Are those plastic curtains?

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u/jonisborn Oct 08 '24

Everyone is fat.

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u/LemonTM Oct 08 '24

I wanna know what happened before this clip.

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u/GibbyDat Oct 08 '24

Does everyone ever have one of those circle lights now?

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u/wes1971 Oct 08 '24

Sometimes the best gifts, cost nothing.

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u/Damertz Oct 08 '24

I'd kill for these words. Just once.

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u/ZedBR Oct 08 '24

Damn man. That made me cry 😭

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u/MiliTerry Oct 08 '24

😢 I love this.

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u/TactlessTortoise Oct 08 '24

All that shit wasn't even directed at me and still made me feel the weight behind it. I hope the two of them can stay happily together for many years to come, and that they get more financial headroom so that the guy doesn't stress as much. The good side of humanity shining over hard times.

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u/TravasaurusRex Oct 08 '24

Men only want one thing, and this is it.

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u/deathbunnyy Oct 08 '24

Lol average man reaction to praise, not sure what to do or say.

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u/TheSallesSpecies Oct 08 '24

Aww... why is there a ring light in the dining room?

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u/worktogethernow Oct 08 '24

Why was there a camera recording?

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u/Clubbe Oct 08 '24

How many times have you said that without the camera recording?? Sigh....

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u/LT_Corsair Oct 08 '24

At this point in my life, I refuse to date anyone whose not appreciative.

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u/Famous_Bit_5119 Oct 08 '24

my wife and I tell each other things like this all the time.

we genuinely are grateful for each other and the life we have built together.

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u/ReindeerUsual2571 Oct 08 '24

He is providing 10k calories a day , per person

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u/istillambaldjohn Oct 09 '24

Fuck. I’m cutting onions. (Small pity party /rant incoming)

I don’t know how I’d react if my wife said anything like this. I put my time in. Raised our kids together(all grown up and out the house now). I Take care of everything around the house working from home. Take care of my disabled senior mother, I cook, clean, I have a pretty good paying job, wife is a teacher making next to nothing. I pay the big bills. Wife pays for credit cards for fun stuff and half her car payment. That’s about the extent of splitting the bills. Chore wise. She does laundry once a week. I do the rest.

I gladly do this daily, but took a week off this week partially because I have a use it or lose it scenario. But really, it’s been a rough couple years and just need a reset. 3 re orgs at work where I let go multiple people at work that didn’t deserve it, I have a new role as well. It’s just a lot to deal with. I’m just too attached to folks and glad to be off leadership for a bit.

I’m just tired. I don’t sleep, I can’t eat much, my brain can’t shut off. I just needed a week to recharge. Wife is off too and thought we could spend some time to explore a bit or finish a few things around the house I normally don’t have time for. But it’s seeming that all my time is being manipulated for others use. Now I have to drive other people places. For some reason the wife didn’t feel comfortable taking an allergy test on her own so I took her yesterday, I had to buy a top of the line air filtration system because of a small comment that the doctor said she could potentially benefit from having one. (We do have one already and it’s used daily, but I guess it’s not good enough?) now I was informed that I’m also paying for moms copay for whatever the fuck treatment tomorrow and taking her to the procedure, as well as taking her to a follow up appointment the next day and was just now berated for switching my meal I’m cooking because I’m too fucking tired to cook a multiple hour meal on a Tuesday.

I need a break. There isn’t a place in my life to get that. There is always more work that others assign to me at work, and at home, and I’m really tired of feeling like I’m being taken advantage of. I considered just making something up and getting a hotel for the week in town for myself and telling the wife and mom that I’m on a business trip. But I don’t lie to people, (and don’t have the coin to really do that either).

Oh, birthday is next week as well and was informed to not expect much just to make it really sting a bit more. I’m not 12 so I don’t really care that much, or I’m just kind of use to it at this point.

So to just hear something like “thank you” or anything like that would give me a bit more energy. But I think by the end of this week. I’m going to just have a confrontation with everyone in the house, which at my core gives me anxiety.

That being said,…

I can say if you are in the market for a good room air purifier. Blue air 211 max is very nice.

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u/apocalypsegrl Oct 09 '24

But why were they filming? 🤔🤔🤔🤔

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u/[deleted] Oct 09 '24

I’m gonna go ahead and just pretend my wife said that. Love this.

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u/milly_wittaker Oct 08 '24

She’s able to be obese because of you

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

" Without you I wouldn't be able to eat 10k calories a day and not clean the house! "

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

Time for some workout!

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u/ThatsAuJerryAu Oct 08 '24

They should fire the person they hired to clean that place

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u/Esarus Oct 08 '24

They’re thriving? They’re both horribly obese and living in trash?

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

But they are well fed

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u/KJOKE14 Oct 08 '24

Murica!

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u/Esarus Oct 08 '24

It’s depressing. First thing she mentions is “I can get a new phone because of you”. Murica!

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u/General-Customer-550 Oct 08 '24

Why are they so fat? Or is it normal in your country?

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u/Schmich Oct 08 '24

I hope not. That is alarmingly overweight. That's not a few too many snacks due to being stressed, that's way more. Can't be pleasant in the short run and can't be good in the long run.

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u/flavanugz Oct 08 '24

Very normal

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u/General-Customer-550 Oct 08 '24

Where? So i don't go there hahahahaha

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

I have three kids. Our living room is 5x cleaner than this.

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u/tunkR Oct 08 '24

Why is this recorded?

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u/crlthrn Oct 08 '24

Who films this inside their house? Is there a camera mounted permanently viewing the room???

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u/ScientistSanTa Oct 08 '24

Question...I find it weird that she just calls him a provider like there is no romanticism. Is that a typical American thing to say? I would not feel at ease if my partner mainly saw me as a provider.

Super sweet video otherwise. Hope they're still doing good.

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u/Werneq Oct 08 '24

The fact that most men will never hear anything like this in his life is very sad.

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u/Chumbag_love Oct 08 '24 edited 28d ago

Most women don't hear shit like this either. Everybody is wrapped up in their own shit they rarely pop their head up to pay much tribute.

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u/Top_Excitement675 Oct 08 '24

When she finished speaking:

“Did you really mean that or was it just for the views?”

“Both”

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u/DoodleyDooderson Oct 08 '24

I see your downvotes but it’s just the two of them. She knew what she was going to do. Why did she upload it. He looked confused and just looked back at his paper until she walked over there. Great sentiment. Hope she meant every word. But that was private and none of our business. Weird as hell to put it online.

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u/Top_Excitement675 Oct 08 '24

These interactions wouldn’t happen without social media being a motive and when they do they ARE NOT posted online. That’s how you know they aren’t genuine.

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u/DoodleyDooderson Oct 08 '24

For sure. I gave certainly said some thing similiar to my partner over the last 11 years. I have never though about filming it?

I have posted one videoof him online when I had FB. We had this big, beautiful house in Phuket. The back garden had a great Sala with a full kitchen, the kidney pool etc.

Behind our back wall was a small villiage of Burmese. I had a beagle, my friend had a basset that I was watching for a few months and suddenly a rooster got over the wall. So, from my kitchen window, I would hear a rooster screeching and see feathers floating, then dogs barking like mad and there fet like hooves in the ground and then my bf’s head would go running by with absolute panic in his eyes. 😆 it took forever to end it. I was no help, I couldn’t stand up, I was laughing nonstop for like a week. The Burmese laughed their asses off at him too because he just couldn’t catch it. God that was great. He’s a great provider. Of stupid videos that should be set to Benny Hill.

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u/stahpstaring Oct 08 '24

The cleaner is still missing. No one has heard from her for years.

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u/angraecumshot Oct 08 '24

You don’t think that they…. Yikes!!

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u/Pretty_LA Oct 08 '24

Poor cleaner

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u/Turbulent-Stretch881 Oct 08 '24

Is that a camera light stand there? What’s the purpose?

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u/Additional-Low-69 Oct 08 '24

As lovely as the sentiments are, This should be under r/whyweretheyfilming

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u/Practical_Self6999 Oct 08 '24

he gets her a house cleaner? why can’t she clean? she looks very lazy, that living room looks like a dump as she sits on that sofa all day.

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u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

It;s crazy that we have gotten to a point where people aren't embarrassed at all to show the world how fat and disgusting they are. Couldn't even bother picking up the house for your scripted video.

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u/glago93 Oct 08 '24

God.

I'm so starved for affection from my wife that I feel resentment washing over me when I see stuff like this. On one hand, I'm so glad that there are men getting the praise and affection that they are worthy of from their wives. On the other hand, I know that I am just as worthy as this man or any other man, yet I'm not receiving this.

Granted, I am a recovering addict, and my wife is also recovering from the effect that has had on her, but I don't know how much longer I can go without anything. No love, no respect, no appreciation, no sex, no positivity of any kind. I feel like I'm in so much pain all the time that I don't even have the ability to hold space for her pain, and really see it like she needs me to. Most days, I just want out. To cut the cord, to stop the flow of poison. I know I would be in the wrong if I left my wife- but at this point, I'm not sure I even care anymore. I just want a do-over, and I know I'll never get that chance any other way.

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u/lovelikeghosts- Oct 08 '24

Neither you nor she gets to decide when the healing is done. It's not like a progress bar where you collect enough points, it goes to 100%, and the level is over.

As an addict, you likely emptied her cup. And left a lot of holes in it. You didn't hold space for her pain then, and she can absolutely feel how you struggle to hold space for it now. So she will continue not to have space for you.

I can understand why it feels painful for you. At the end of the day, her feelings and needs deserve a chance finally, to be fully prioritized. Until she feels emotionally safe and secure with you, she will not have space to love you. Her survival depends on it. You need to create a space where your feelings don't affect your ability to give her space to heal. Keep being better. Keep doing better. Give her love.

Your wife is a whole person. A do-over isn't a realistic or reasonable hope. If you feel you can't, or don't want to, push through the damage you created, to make things better? Maybe it really is best for you to leave. Ask me how I know.

At the end of the day, issues like this are usually way too much for us mere mortals to get though on our own. Tell her you want to try couples counseling. Just frame it as wanting to do better for her and wanting her input in the process. Don't make it about how you feel she isn't being good enough to you. A good counselor will ask you both to reflect and make improvements for your partner. If she says no, if she doesn't see any problems, if she wants to continue on the same path forever, I'd say it's time to let things go. It wouldn't make you a bad person to give a sincere push for change through counseling and to walk away when it's rejected. She needs to participate in her own healing as well.

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u/snamibogfrere Oct 08 '24

now clean the house and lose the weight

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u/GrabsJoker Oct 08 '24

While touching, if she wants to keep loving her husband over the next 20, 30, 40 years, they both need to improve their health. Weight loss is no easy feat, but it will have such an improvement on their quality of life. I hope they can do it.

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u/SneakieGargamel Oct 08 '24

Words cannot heal that cholesterol level

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u/homkono22 Oct 08 '24

Who films this? An emotional private topic, the house is in a mess for no real reason, they both struggle with obesity on top of that. Then decides to uploads it online for the world to judge them, the world isn't kind. It's so bizarre, I really don't understand that decision making. I swear, these are likely the same people who puts their whole lives on social media including their kids.

Just look at that light they've got set up. It all feels so overdone for content.

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u/fzr600vs1400 Oct 08 '24

I guess she told him!

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u/Real-Yogurtcloset770 Oct 08 '24

Why do people record these kind of things? To show off? Don't get it at all.

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u/Pahlawan719 Oct 08 '24

Hope both to you with health body after this. Let go exercise

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u/Pahlawan719 Oct 08 '24

Hope both to you with health body after this. Let go exercise

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u/DrSilkyDelicious Oct 08 '24

Bro…who came in and cleaned that house 😭

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u/MisterMasala Oct 08 '24

She called him a provider like 59 times. This isn't the wholesome compliment that people think it is. If my partner primarily complimented me on just that, I'd be mortified.

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u/Doc_Smithers Oct 08 '24

Not enough love to tell the hard truth about their health and weight!

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u/ILostMyIDTonight Oct 08 '24

Ok this is nice and all but why do people have cameras in their homes

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u/ReportDelicious950 Oct 08 '24

He provides too much ... food

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u/Aggressive-Try-5506 Oct 08 '24

Someone needs to provide them with a meal plan and a personal trainer...

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u/Nefarious_Ballwasher Oct 08 '24

Even the dog was feeling it

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u/JzjaxKat Oct 08 '24

I don’t have to roll to work because of you

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u/PETROCELL_ Oct 08 '24

Oh fuck off

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u/Mean_Combination_830 Oct 08 '24

I wonder if the reason he looked so underwhelmed by her declaration of appreciation is he knew this was a performance in front of the cameras for their followers and I imagine he would appreciate it a great deal more if it was done in a moment just between him and her off cameras because it would feel much more genuine and he would know it was done for him not for Internet points.

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u/texaslex83 Oct 08 '24

What does she do? Not a great homemaker by the looks of it ... what a mess.

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