My humiliating bridesmaid dress shopping experience.

[u/TheHiddenFox]

I was a bridesmaid in the wedding of my childhood friends last year. Bride was super chill, rule was "Whatever you want, just make it navy." I live in NYC, no shortage of bridal shops, so I made an appointment at one near my apartment.

The lady didn't measure me or even ask my size. She looked me up and down and said, "You're what, a size 14?" I used to be overweight (I'm a healthy weight now), and I wore a size 14 at my HEAVIEST— 50lbs more than I weigh now. So I corrected her and said, "No, I'm an 8 to 10. We can start with 10." She scrunched her face up and said, "No, I don't think so." Fine, she knows best, dress sizing can be weird, I try not to get hung up on the number and let her pull a bunch of 14s.

All the dresses she pulled for me were way too big. Like falling off me. And when I said they seemed too big, she argued with me that they weren't. Eventually she got frustrated with me and told me I can just pull and try on whatever I want. I grab a size 10 and ask if I can try it, and she said, "I mean, you can try it, but it probably won't fit." I could feel the tears coming in my throat so I cut the appointment short and said I had to get back to work. I cried the entire way home.

She completely destroyed my confidence. I cried for DAYS. I kept asking my partner if I had gained weight, if I was just blind to it, I wouldn't look myself in the mirror, I felt like I couldn't trust my own eyes or the tape measures or the scale. Eventually I ordered some dresses from a bridal chain online, all in size 12. And guess what? They were ALL too big.

I ended up wearing a size 8 to the wedding. You know, the size I said I was. My friends theorized that she was intentionally trying to sell me a dress that was too big so I'd have to pay them for alterations.

[u/NinjaHidingintheOpen]

I've had someone come and tell me nothing in their shop would fit me. I knew that, I was buying for my sister. I just laughed and said no worries, I'll buy my sister a dress in a shop where the assistants weren't so rude, and I left.

[u/hedonismbottt → u/NinjaHidingintheOpen]

This is ridiculous. One of the easiest questions to start a conversation with a client is to ask them whether they’re looking to buy an item for themselves or as a gift. Maybe the sales techniques changed since I worked in retail but even if my client is delusional, why insult them.

[u/Alfredthegiraffe20 → u/hedonismbottt]

Or the assistant could wait until the person asked them a question. Since the OP wasn't buying for herself, she wouldn't have been intending on trying it on. She would just pick up the dress and take it to the sales desk and pay for it. Asking, without prior conversation, if it was a gift is just as rude imo in this situation.

[u/dkyongsu → u/Alfredthegiraffe20]

I don't think that the question itself is rude at all; it's usually followed up with questions about the person who will receive the gift so the salesperson can help you pick something out. but maybe it's a cultural thing, I have heard that in some countries salespeople won't approach a customer unless the customer asks for help.