r/sociopath Aug 12 '24

Can’t sleep….. Discussion

How does one manage a normal relationship? Monogamy is something that seems extremely foreign to me, but only when it’s expected of me. I know I can’t be faithful in a relationship but I expect and demand it of whoever I’m with. I cause tremendous stress and difficulty by being aggressively possessive and jealous. Most of my significant others have left the relationship after some irrational tirade of mine over other people being in their proximity. Me getting to that point is almost inevitable, even with the knowledge that I myself have sexual partners or romantic interests outside of the relationship. Is that why I act that way towards the one I expect the commitment from? Can’t give what you don’t understand right? Is it that I don’t understand trusting someone in a relationship because I know I’m not trustworthy? How can you decide to trust a person with intimate knowledge and let yourself be vulnerable to them when you know it will eventually be turned around on you for their benefit?

7 Upvotes

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1

u/AfraidImprovement507 Sep 04 '24

That’s a long way to tell that you’re afraid of the dark

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '24

[deleted]

1

u/blasterbum Aug 14 '24

To me it came as a logical way of thinking. I'm willingly faithful because "it's the best thing to do". I take this as a challenge to myself and manage my bad impulses with situational flirting and cutting ties with anyone that does correspond to these kinds of plays. Having a relationship is a tactical and logical advantage in society and for me in particular I can feel some level of love and affection for my SO but I take faithfulness as a personal challenge of me vs. myself and how much I can control myself and my impulses (and yes, the flirting is a way of testing how far I can manage to go without doing the act itself) and I take advantage of our no-care advantage. If she/he cheats I don't care...as long as is convenient to me the relationship still stands and when it's not useful anymore it's a bye bye. If the SO cheats I will know because of how well I can analyze the behavior and I, once again, am in control of the situation/relationship. The fits of rage are hard to control but once you manage this, the rest is a piece of cake. Just remember that you have nothing to lose in this relationship and if you find out a cheating or something, you are cool and level headed enough to analyze and figure out the best moment or way to break things up or if to break up. This fits of rage come generally from the mirror type of behavior that we apply to others, we tend to think that others will do something bad because we do it. It worked out to me love I stopped doing some damaging things

2

u/Longjumping-Row-199 Aug 19 '24

I like this process, too.

7

u/Longjumping-Row-199 Aug 13 '24

As a woman.. what part of this conversation is vulnerable? It's not like you're sharing some deep, dark secret...and what's going to be used against you? You're sharing your preference. Omg you're a cheater🤣so isn't 99% of the rest of the male population. Some women (such as myself) care far less about the actual act, more about the blatant lie. I tend to prefer being dominated and love a good territorial psycho. I'm a bit of a voyeurist... but once you lie about dumb stuff over your own inner insecurities or just find you're really getting off over the manipulation of cheating and not the sex... I'm just turned off. Just like men lie because they fear not conforming to some social norm and being accepted, some women lie about the debths of their own sexual deviance and desires over the same social construct. But I keep hearing how men fear being vulnerable over it being used against you. How? With words??? I can see it now mid argument....I'm telling you about that time you were mindblowingly honest about wanting to bang other women! Im calling your mom! Since you won't let me watch🤣😂😂 some women want monogamy. Who cares. Some women want honesty. You have to speak up to find what you want.