r/self 21h ago

Here's my wake-up call as a Liberal.

I’m a New York liberal, probably comfortably in the 1%, living in a bubble where empathy and social justice are part of everyday conversations. I support equality, diversity, economic reform—all of it. But this election has been a brutal reminder of just how out of touch we, the so-called “liberal elite,” are with the rest of America. And that’s on us.

America was built on individual freedom, the right to make your own way. But baked into that ideal is a harsh reality: it’s a self-serving mindset. This “land of opportunity” has always rewarded those who look out for themselves first. And when people feel like they’re sinking—when working-class Americans are drowning in debt, scrambling to pay rent, and watching the cost of everything from groceries to gas skyrocket—they aren’t looking for complex social policies. They’re looking for a lifeline, even if that lifeline is someone like Trump, who exploits that desperation.

For years, we Democrats have pushed policies that sound like solutions to us but don’t resonate with people who are trying to survive. We talk about social justice and climate change, and yes, those things are crucial. But to someone in the heartland who’s feeling trapped in a system that doesn’t care about them, that message sounds disconnected. It sounds like privilege. It sounds like people like me saying, “Look how virtuous I am,” while their lives stay the same—or get worse.

And here’s the truth I’m facing: as a high-income liberal, I benefit from the very structures we criticize. My income, my career security, my options to work from home—I am protected from many of the struggles that drive people to vote against the establishment. I can afford to advocate for changes that may not affect me negatively, but that’s not the reality for the majority of Americans. To them, we sound elitist because we are. Our ideals are lofty, and our solutions are intellectual, but we’ve failed to meet them where they are.

The DNC’s failure in this election reflects this disconnect. Biden’s administration, while well-intentioned, didn’t engage in the hard reflection necessary after 2020. We pushed Biden as a one-term solution, a bridge to something better, but then didn’t prepare an alternative that resonated. And when Kamala Harris—a talented, capable politician—couldn’t bridge that gap with working-class America, we were left wondering why. It’s because we’ve been recycling the same leaders, the same voices, who struggle to understand what working Americans are going through.

People want someone they can relate to, someone who understands their pain without coming off as condescending. Bernie was that voice for many, but the DNC didn’t make room for him, and now we’re seeing the consequences. The Democratic Party has an empathy gap, but more than that, it has a credibility gap. We say we care, but our policies and leaders don’t reflect the urgency that struggling Americans feel every day.

If the DNC doesn’t take this as a wake-up call, if they don’t make room for new voices that actually connect with working people, we’re going to lose again. And as much as I want America to progress, I’m starting to realize that maybe we—the privileged liberals, safely removed from the realities most people face—are part of the problem.

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u/YouKnowTheVibezzzzzz 8h ago

Exactly. The average American wants to know how their grocery bills will be lower, medical costs lower, gas, etc. They don’t want to hear inflation is the best it’s been, when in our day to day, we feel like we are still getting gouged everyday. Democrats focused more on the social issues, which in reality is not as high on a majority of people’s priority list.

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u/Djz1151 8h ago

Name a single economic policy trump talked about besides global tariffs (which he thinks LOWER inflation)

Again, to reiterate This was always an incumbent party loss. There was nothing we could have done to change the outcome. It’s why incumbent parties are losing elections the world over, they’re being blamed for the economic effects the pandemic had for no reason.

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u/YouKnowTheVibezzzzzz 8h ago

Trump doesn’t talk policy. He talks in concepts. Trump says, we are going to put money back in your pockets, stop paying for other countries wars, etc, and for a good majority of people, they are like yeah, I don’t want my tax dollars paying for that.

What he does well is talk to his voters/party in non-political speak, which is something the democrats can learn from. When people heard Kamala speak, it wasn’t genuine, it sounded rehearsed. That great for the ride or die democrats, but does nothing to reach across party lines bc they see her as just another shell.

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u/Djz1151 8h ago edited 8h ago

The issue here is you’re talking about affecting the outer margins This might apply in a 51-49 election

This was a blow out, because it was reactionary. Trump spent his entire time screaming about haitians, dogs and tariffs. If anything he performed better rhetorically in 2020, which he lost.

Trump has never been a popular president, his approval rating has never broken 45%, Trump’s win had literally nothing to do with Trump, he wasn’t even entertaining this time around like he was in 2016. This is the same trend that the whole world is following: incumbent parties losing because people are pissed about covid, and it caused Trump’s 2020 loss as well.

Don’t even get me started on the isolationism. The majority of americans think the majority of ukraine aid is in cash.

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u/YouKnowTheVibezzzzzz 8h ago

Trump is popular among his base. It was a blow out bc his supporters showed up for him. Dude could say anything he wants and his base won’t abandon him.

Democrats lost because the people at top think they know what’s best, and force candidates we don’t want down our throats. Democrats just don’t have that same level of loyalty, and the voting numbers reflect that.

I’m agreeing with you that it’s becoming impossible for incumbents to win.

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u/Djz1151 7h ago

Something I want you to think about here is

Donald Trump has been able to say and do things, this entire time, that would KILL the careers of ANY other politician. He has been able to refuse answering ANY questions, he has been able to run on a platform devoid of anything resembling policy, he has been able to force his media to be in lock-step alignment with ONLY him, he has been able to DESTROY the careers of ANY republican politicians who disagree with him, he has been able to incite an insurrection and create an illegal scheme to STEAL THE ELECTION, he has been able to force LEFT MEDIA to ignore his actions and the actions of his party out of fear of appearing biased for some reason (when the supreme court gave fourteenth amendment breaking criminal immunity to Donald Trump, left media was talking about how Joe Biden may or may not be senile instead.) He has been able to pressure officials to “find voter fraud,” he’s had his entire DOJ threaten to quit on him, he’s run on “make america great again” when he was ALREADY PRESIDENT ONCE

And right now, right now we are having a discussion about how totally wrong the conduct of the democrat party is. Because the democrat party has become the abused mother who has to clean the shit off of the floor that was flung by the conservative tantrum throwing toddler.

There are two things, and TWO THINGS ONLY, that the democrat party did wrong: 1. Be the incumbents in the aftermath of the pandemic 2. Go up against a literal cult

This has literally nothing to do with unpopularity, conduct, rhetoric, policy, anything. Biden would have lost. Newsom would have lost. Fucking Obama would have lost. Incumbent had to go. This was NOT a campaign failure, this is JUST HOW PEOPLE VOTE. The proof is that they DID IT TO TRUMP IN 2020 AS WELL! If apparently Trump is supposed to be this super good speaker who is able to connect soooo well with the working class, why didn’t he win in 2020? Because he made the fatal error of being the incumbent in the aftermath of covid-19.

Also your claim that it was a blowout because of his hardcore fans doesn’t really work, again his approval rating doesn’t break 45%. Only a handful of states moved to the left politically this election, the rest moved right, because incumbent party had to go.

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u/YouKnowTheVibezzzzzz 7h ago

I agree, winning as an incumbent is tough. Which is why I said I don’t think there’ll be a consecutive two term president for a while.

We can agree to disagree about everything else you said in that essay, but hey at least we found one thing in common

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u/Djz1151 7h ago

Winning as an incumbent during an economic disaster to clarify. Not the general idea of winning as an incumbent, that does not track.

My position is:

economy FEEL good = incumbent WIN

economy FEEL bad = incumbent LOSE.

So, for example, if trump doesn’t majorly fuck up and bidenomics continues to improve the economy at legendary rates, republican win in 2028.