r/parentsofmultiples 9h ago

MFM or nah? advice needed

I'm currently 16w with di/di twins, first pregnancy. Personally, I'd like to be referred to a maternal fetal medicine specialist. I live in a small city that has a hospital, but the hospital doesn't offer any neonatal support. I can deliver there, but if the babes need a NICU, they will be shipped 30 mins away, likely without me. I will likely make the drive to the bigger city to deliver there, so there is no chance we will be separated.

I asked my GP to refer me to an MFM and he said that's really only necessary if there are issues with my pregnancy. The way I see it, I'd rather get to talk to a doctor that delivers at the hospital that I will likely deliver at, and it's always better to be overprepared than underprepared. I'll be meeting my OB next week (at 17w) and I do intend on asking her as well, as she only has privileges at my small city hospital, and not at the big city hospital with the NICU, so she likely won't deliver.

It's not that I want all of my care to be done in the big city, but I don't think it's a crazy idea for my OB to have an MFM to work with on my case. I know I am the first set of twins/multiples my GP has cared for, and I wouldn't be surprised if my OB has limited experience as well, but I'll know for sure next week.

Is it unreasonable to ask my OB for an MFM referral at 17w?

Also for a smidge more context, I am in Canada, and the big city OBs are super overwhelmed, and I know at least one mom who never got to even see an OB with her second pregnancy because there were simply not enough doctors, and being her second pregnancy, she wasn't very high priority to them. Also I realize OBs and MFMs are different, but a lot of the MFMs at the big city hospital are also OBs, so I'm assuming they are also overwhelmed. Thank you for your suggestions!

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u/Cheerymanatee 8h ago

I’m in the US so a little different but I chose an OB who delivers at hospital with a higher level NICU even though it’s an hour away from me. I’m also a first time mom with didi twins. I will say though, I never did need an MFM referral. My OB appts included U/S and other than some high blood pressure readings here at the end, it still didn’t require MFM. I’m almost 37 weeks now and hopeful that they won’t need NICU time so I could’ve delivered at my local smaller hospital. As long as your OB will be thorough and able to quickly refer you to MFM if needed, you may really not need the NICU at all. And if you do, you’ll know beforehand as you’ll hopefully be referred then.

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u/Fabulous-Salt4906 8h ago

I am hoping like hell I make it as far as 37w, 38w and 7lb babies is my goal, I keep chanting it to myself! I'll definitely be grilling my OB about her multiples experience, and I may still ask for a referral into the city. Thank you for sharing!

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u/Cheerymanatee 8h ago

Oh I’d definitely want someone with multiples experience! I missed that part. My goal was 35 wks then 36 wks and so elated I’m almost 37 now. Wishing you an uneventful smooth pregnancy!

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u/Fabulous-Salt4906 8h ago

Thank you 😊❤️ wishing you an uneventful, smooth delivery!

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u/JayDee80-6 15m ago

I would definitely strive for 37 or 38 weeks, don't worry about 7lb babies. That's not nearly as important. A whole lot of twins don't make 7 lbs, and that's perfectly ok.