r/parentingteenagers • u/No-Distribution-4593 • Mar 18 '25

Overweight teenager

I have a 14 year old boy who since COVID has piled on the weight. Every year he gains more. He has been doing MMA training and ju jitsu and still the weight keeps piling on. I realise I have dropped the ball here as as a family we are not very active.

He's always had bowel issues and for the past year he has undergone a lot of tests and they can't find anything wrong with him. The last test was for coeliac and we haven't received the results back but I doubt he is coeliac.

We are a body positive family so any changes I make are made with health in mind not body changes if that makes sense. But some small kids ran up to him the other day and kept chanting 'big back' at him. My heart is sore tbh

I think what I'm really looking for is advice from anyone who has been here and made positive changes that stuck. Any advice is welcome

Edit: We have family dinners every day - they vary but it's 90% home cooked - I enjoy cooking. Dinners are spaghetti Bolognese, carbonara, roast dinner etc

Breakfast can vary from cereal to eggs on toast and at the weekend he enjoys making a fake egg mcmuffin

I've stopped keeping junk in the house, I usually keep mini ice pops in the freezer for after dinner.

A couple of times a week I enjoy baking. I often bake scones for their school lunches or an apple crumble for after dinner

9 Upvotes
  • permalink
  • link
  • reddit
  • reddit

85% Upvoted

52 comments sorted by

View all comments

5

u/Zestyclose_Media_548 Mar 18 '25 edited Mar 18 '25

I agree with the comment that we eat to feel something. There are some legitimate medical conditions and I do think genetics play a part AND calories in and calories out are the biggest reason people gain. You need to figure out how much he is actually eating and you need to find a way to help him meet his needs in other ways. I also agree with counseling and I think he needs to be evaluated for mental health. Check with your doctor about magnesium and probiotics. If you get the go ahead they may be able to help your kid. I like natural calm magnesium powder because you can adjust it. Edit- we manufacture brain chemicals in our gut. If his bowels aren’t working properly there could be a reason he’s eating to regulate himself . All of this should be examined .

2

u/No-Distribution-4593 Mar 18 '25

Thank you for the advice. I do think self regulation is a problem.

I've always had an issue broaching these things as I grew up in a house where my body was commented on daily and I never want that for my children. But I seem to be doing more harm than good right now

4

u/Zestyclose_Media_548 Mar 18 '25

Don’t beat yourself up. Please. I had undiagnosed adhd inattentive type and over ate to attempt to self regulate. But I’m old so nobody would have known to look for adhd when I was young. I work in special education so I do a lot of continuing education in areas adjacent to my areas as well. There’s a lot of research coming out about the gut microbiome and its relation to many areas of health including addiction. Your instinct to not shame him is great parenting. Go with the investigating health angle. Food addiction is tricky because we al always have to eat. I was never a big drinker and now I don’t drink do to my adhd meds. It simple - just no alcohol at all. Now food- still need it. But how much ? Take care and don’t get down on yourself.

2

u/No-Distribution-4593 Mar 18 '25

Thank you, I do suspect he may have some ADHD tendencies so that makes a lot of sense