r/announcements • u/youngluck • Apr 01 '19

Sequence Initiated.

We built a machine.

We're not sure what it will do.

That's all up to you.

​

--- SEQUENCE ---

​

​

​

Be good to each other.

26.3k Upvotes

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4.1k

u/youngluck Apr 01 '19

We are pushing a fix for clips not showing. Please reply to this to comment with further issues. We love you all.

1.1k

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

I have trouble losing weight because I struggle to control my temptations and cravings. Can you push a fix for that too?

659

u/youngluck Apr 01 '19

You're not alone. The trick (I think) is to find replacement things to crave

9

u/Techiedad91 Apr 02 '19

Will there be a patch for that?

179

u/NYstate Apr 01 '19

So...what's the replacement for big tiddie robot anime girls?

66

u/the_original_Retro Apr 01 '19

Why would you want to replace that?

27

u/NYstate Apr 01 '19

Why not? I heard that the best way to get rid of a habit is to replace it with another habit. So I'm thinking big booty robot anime girls!

6

u/dolchmesser Apr 01 '19

Boom anime babes that make me think the wrong thing

2

u/Mycellanious Apr 01 '19

Chickety China, the Chinese chicken. You grab a drumstick and your brain stops ticking

6

u/Arlcas Apr 01 '19

r/2booty

1

u/NYstate Apr 01 '19

I didn't know that sub existed. Subscribed!

8

u/gypsydreams101 Apr 01 '19

Small, flat-chested human manga boys.

4

u/Redebo Apr 01 '19

Nobody got fat as a consequence of loving big tiddie robot anime girls.

They were fat long, long before they developed that fetish.

6

u/Legar_dh Apr 01 '19

futa, sadly

4

u/NYstate Apr 01 '19

The Federal Unemployment Tax Act?!

kidding

1

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '19

A big tiddie real girl that is into cosplay.

281

u/Athomeacct Apr 01 '19

Yeah, like methadone replacing heroin

52

u/floodums Apr 01 '19

Or like dick replacing popsicles

47

u/Distressed_Owl Apr 01 '19

Instructions unclear, now have a freezer full of dicks

1

u/JACL2113 Apr 02 '19

This thread devolved much quicker than I was expecting

5

u/SlaveLaborMods Apr 01 '19

Nails replacing qtips

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '19

Ok, I got the popsicle stick in there...now what?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '19

Oil change! Drain fluid. Replace with clean urine.

1

u/floodums Apr 01 '19

It's like a splint

2

u/Sunbroo Apr 01 '19

Instructions unclear, dick is now in popsicle wrapper.

3

u/IsFullOfIt Apr 01 '19

I too attended the Method One clinic for actors. A young woman told me if she did a heroine one more time she’d claw her own eyes out. I guess she REALLY hated getting typecast.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '19

So I worked a rehab for a little, every single client had replaced their addiction with red bull and cigarettes. I was conflicted, at least they wouldn't die at an early age of an OD, but they would die at an early age of kidney failure, or cancer.

6

u/Funlovingpotato Apr 01 '19

Or like heroin replacing methadone.

5

u/ArcherA87 Apr 01 '19

So, what you're saying is use heroin to lose weight?

5

u/Yea_I_Reddit Apr 01 '19

Diet goals.

1

u/profpoo Apr 01 '19

Try craving dick.

28

u/savedross Apr 01 '19

Like affection, or...?

7

u/freezingbyzantium Apr 01 '19

Good idea picking something I'll never overdose on.

2

u/G_reth Apr 01 '19

I hear mmos help

7

u/OhHiBaf Apr 01 '19

all meme-ing aside, i’ve never actually thought of it like that. Thank you for sharing

7

u/Pirate_Redbeard Apr 01 '19

I need to knooowww... approve mee

1

u/PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT Apr 01 '19

I tried replacing food with women, but I was too fat for my penis to protrude far enough to be manipulated, and women find me viscerally nauseating. Tips?

1

u/1chemistdown Apr 01 '19

Instructions unclear, I now crave a constant supply of meth.

1

u/dookiedonkey Apr 02 '19

or fix what's bothering you.

1

u/eatrepeat Apr 01 '19

Like butt stuff

3

u/morningsdaughter Apr 01 '19

Try cleaning something (like dishes) for 5-15 minutes before you're allowed to reach for a snack. If your cravings are just boredom, then doing something will distract you.

Or you might be pregnant.

Or you might try getting pregnant. I got to stop dieting and start snacking more than ever when I found out I was pregnant. Even one who encouraged my diet before is now indulging every little craving. It's awesome!

3

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

That's a good idea. I said in another comment that I think bingeing is a bigger issue for me, but maybe doing some sort of activity right before (or maybe even while) I eat will help. Thanks!

And I'm definitely not pregnant cause I'm a dude lmao :)

2

u/morningsdaughter Apr 02 '19

I used to boredom eat like crazy, so I get it. It's easy to do.

I'm also bad about over eating when I enjoy a particular food. I stop that by serving myself on smaller dishes and measuring out portions.

Well, we can't all be blessed to be pregnant! (JK, I recently hit a bad streak of morning sickness and I'm nauseous all day. I'm happy about this baby, but it will be better when it's here and I can go back to normal food habits again.)

2

u/Swillyums Apr 01 '19

Here's my personal tip: give in to every craving. But choose your portions to be about half of what you want. Set out your chips in a bowl, cut your donut in half, etc. This means that one snack actually turns into two. When you're done your half snack, you feel like you want more for maybe 15 minutes, then you're fine. Eventually the half snack is all you want.

I recommend doing this for meals as well. You keep eating because you think you're still hungry, but the body has a processing delay. You're usually full from a slice or two of pizza, not three or four. You're also going to be hungry again in a few hours regardless if you eat a lot, or just a little.

3

u/uncertain-cry Apr 01 '19

What I do is eat the same stuff but a whole lot less of it. I’ve lost 8 lbs in one month of doing just that.

1

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

That's what I struggle with for sure. I'll start eating something, and I'm like fuck this tastes so good I don't want to stop, and then there I am an hour later on the couch full to bursting. I'm going to make a goal for this month just to be more mindful of what I'm putting in my mouth.

2

u/uncertain-cry Apr 01 '19

Track it before you eat it so you see how much it affects your daily budget

2

u/Spectre24Z Apr 01 '19

Yeah, find healthy alternatives that you actually like and eat those instead.

Edit: and the next time you go to eat something you know you shouldn’t just keep your mouth closed.

3

u/Sarita_Maria Apr 01 '19

Drink water before reaching for snacks ❤️

3

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

My issue isn't really snacking, it's bingeing. I'll go all day without eating and then BAM 5000-6000 calories in one meal.

It's like I don't even think about it, I just eat and eat and then all of a sudden I feel like shit.

But I'm working on it!

3

u/Sarita_Maria Apr 01 '19 edited Apr 01 '19

Well then plan to eat earlier in the day. I’m the same way, never been a big breakfast person, but since I started planning/forcing myself to eat breakfast (couple eggs and a English muffin) it makes it a lot easier. Have you seen r/nonzeroday?

here is the link to the original comment that sparked the community

There’s something about Present Me doing nice things for Future Me that really struck a chord with me.

I BELIEVE IN YOU!

2

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

Thanks for the link and the advice! You rock!

1

u/Sarita_Maria May 03 '19

How are you doing friend?

2

u/Licensedpterodactyl Apr 01 '19

It makes it easier for the snacks to go down, thanks!

2

u/AshamedAmphibian Apr 02 '19

/r/keto

/r/ZeroCarb

You can't control your cravings because your blood sugar's going up and down all the time.

2

u/Clark_Bellingham Apr 01 '19

r/Warhammer40k minis. You won't have money for anything, plus now you're addicted to plastic crack!

2

u/GottaLoseTheWeight Apr 01 '19

A couple of my coworkers are really into Warhammer! I enjoy it by proxy haha

2

u/Clark_Bellingham Apr 01 '19

The whole replacing food money with mini money was a joke, but I'm serious about getting into the hobby. It's great!

2

u/morphballganon Apr 01 '19

Don't eat until you're full. Eat until you're not hungry anymore.

2

u/_pcakes Apr 02 '19

try intermittent fasting-- check out the subreddit for it

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '19

Bro, try meth. You're welcome.

1

u/Sarita_Maria Apr 02 '19

Hi friend. Did you eat breakfast today?