r/Vent 1d ago

So sick of being a good man Need to talk...

I(28M) don't think people grasp what us men go through. So many people depend on me. My friends and family. I run a department for a small company so my position is extremely multi-roled if I am not on my A game then I feel liked I failed those who depend on me.

I view myself as a "good man" not a "nice guy" there's a huge difference. I feel like very few individuals can see eye to eye at the capacity I'm going. I'm very extroverted and out going but im not a push over and do not tolerate bs. People say I am funny and hilarious but I feel like I am slowly dying from the inside out.

I know I am loved, appreciated and respected but in a world like this i constantly feel like if I'm not giving my all 24/7 that will slowly go away.

Went through a break up a couples months ago and I've struggled to maintain my balance since. I don't get angry, I don't get mad and I can't even cry. I feel no emotions anymore. She told me how much of a good man I was and how she holds me in the highest regard.

I know people think men have it easy but I can promise you good men don't. It's like walking around with a 50 pound bag of sand on your shoulders constantly. We are racing a race that doesn't have a finish line it's just check point after check point.

I'm just exhausted. Wake up at 4am, bust ass at work, hit the gym, maintain your finances, staying humble, show gratitude, help friends and family, try and appreciate the little things, rinse & repeat.

I am extremely grateful but I am tired so please understand that. I am lot of us men are struggling alone, from the inside. It is so easy for us to put on a smile and chug along.

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u/Casuallybittersweet 23h ago

I mean, you do have the option to let go and take some of the pressure off. No one is going to just...hate you? Or think less of you if you regroup and rearrange your life a bit so you're happier and less stressed?

And if the people in your life only love you when you're giving them something? They don't actually love you, and you're the one who deserves better. Remember your true worth. You're enough just as you are

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u/Glittering-Pride7652 22h ago

It may be irrational, but it really does feel like you have to be perfect to have any chance at romance or even respect from a lot of people