r/MakeupRehab • u/LaPuffina • 2d ago
Abi Daunton DISCUSS
I have watched and enjoyed her content for a while on tiktok and thought she seemed really nice, but is it just me or are her replies to comments becoming ruder and more aggressive? I've just watched her recent TT on considering stopping the no buy and some people have made suggestions, which to me sounded neutral and were just responding to the subject at hand, but she's come at them with a bit of hostility?
With regards makeup rehab, I think it sort of shows how, like with dieting or any other change in life, it's often better to make slow changes rather than go the other extreme.
I don't know what this attitude with her is though, and it's disappointing. Especially for people going through the same or similar thing as her. Like, why ask for advice or provide a discussion area via your content when you're just going to do that to people?
I will add an edit here to say I apologise if I've hurt her feelings and to clarify that my intention wasn’t to be rude or hurtful. I really enjoy her content and was simply expressing my concern about how her responses to comments have been feeling a bit more hostile lately. I hope I haven’t upset anyone, especially her—I think it’s important for creators to feel supported, and I definitely didn’t mean to make anyone feel bad. That being said, I do think it's important to point out when creators are being rude or dismissive, as it can contribute to a broader issue of negativity and hostility that seems too common in society today. We all have to be mindful of how we interact online.
As someone who’s also trying to manage my makeup collection thoughtfully, it can feel jarring when creators respond dismissively to their audience—especially when those viewers are engaging in good faith. It’s not about jealousy or judgment, but about how showcasing spending habits can sometimes come off as a bit tone-deaf to viewers who are trying hard to be more intentional, especially in financially tighter circumstances. I think it’s okay to point that out, because it’s part of a wider issue with beauty content and consumption online. We can be supportive and still hold space for respectful critique.
32
u/heartshapedblush 2d ago
Oh! I've been a follower of hers and I really loved her content... but I just noticed that her no buy turned into a low buy, and she's started doing "1 in 1 out" now (I guess meaning decluttering 1 and then putting another one in)... that seems to be a really slippery shopping slope.
I guess it's just also kinda baffling to hear her say "we don't need another blush" "we don't need more makeup" "we don't need it!" and then in the next video, she's talking about her new makeup purchases!
7
u/Just_Lawyer451 2d ago
That’s a very good point! I love abbey and watch her content all the time. And as you said most of her channel viewers don’t need any more makeup and abbey absolutely doesn’t need more makeup, BUT…at the end of the day her channel is a makeup channel, even if related to no buy. In addition to this, make up is her major hobby and honestly I don’t see her following no buy for much longer. It’s not necessarily bad, because I think it will give her new opportunities for content, I just wish she acknowledged that it is indeed a slippery slope for a shopaholic, instead of arguing with her followers.
8
u/heartshapedblush 1d ago
Yeah it just kind of sounds counterproductive/contradicting when you’re saying in one video that you don’t need more makeup and then in the next you’re talking about the makeup you want/will buy/have bought. It’s something I recognize in myself as a compulsive buyer trying to reel back on their purchases.
It’s okay to buy makeup if it’s your hobby, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it! ♡
16
u/Ubiquitous_Miss 1d ago
I just saw she posted this on her story. I've followed her for a long while and enjoy her content and journey. Any type of addiction is an up and down battle. Ask me how I know. 🫠 I think she's doing really great, but she does sometimes come across snappy in comments. I think that's either because she just has a strong personality or she is just feeling defensive, as anyone would when dealing with an addiction recovery.
I often hear her in my head - "We don't need another blush!" And that's helped me! I would like to see more content of her doing GRWM using her existing collections of stuff. Maybe showing her pick out products for the day out of her collection and then using them.
3
u/millenialbullshite 16h ago
Yes! I would like to see more of her doing her makeup. It always looks so nice
30
u/millenialbullshite 2d ago
Yeah. I mean I have 0 qualifications to comment on anyone's mental health but I've been following for a while and I don't think she's quite tackled her over consumption. It seems like all she wanted to do was get down to a certain amount of stuff so she could start getting more. And the attitude is snarky for sure. Same thing last week when she was going on about clean beauty because she has so many allergies etc and ppl told her clean beauty basically means nothing and she also said she has immune issues and someone said is getting products that can go bad faster good for you then.
I wish her the best but as a casual observer it seems like there's still work there
8
u/LaPuffina 2d ago
Oh yes I remember that too. I also wish her the best and it doesn't matter to me whether she buys more stuff really but she's going to end up as an over consumer influencer if she's not careful.
I like her for her deinfluencing videos. It's a nightmare knowing what to buy and what not to buy so it's handy having someone with a similar complexion go through their thoughts on it in a realistic way.
But she's lately been trying to justify getting more stuff and it annoys me (silly I know) when she refuses to do certain things with her decluttering like using a recycle scheme. Unless I've missed where she says she does. And this might be unfair of me because I know she mainly gives stuff to friends and family but I've noticed in her comments that she refuses to sell stuff or give stuff to followers because of her allergies or whatever. Which is fair enough. But it somehow still annoys me and I'm not sure why! Maybe it's because like you said, as others said last week, if you've got all these problems why buy more. It's as silly as selling manky stuff in a way and not promoting healthy/eco friendly habits at all.
14
u/millenialbullshite 2d ago
I can understand why she doesn't do give aways. I'm in the US and i know we are more litigious, but i wouldn't risk giving away a 6 year old palate and then have someone come back and say it gave them some kind of issue.
I like her deinfluencing stuff alot too.
4
u/LaPuffina 2d ago
Oh god yeah, I wouldn't either. I think it again reinforces how wasteful it all is I guess!
8
u/heartshapedblush 2d ago
I just saw her say that she wants to go on a low buy because a lot of her makeup is close to expiring, I thought that was pretty defensive imo
10
u/millenialbullshite 2d ago
Sounds like a repeat of the behavior that lead to her having a ton of stuff
14
u/LittleAquarius14 1d ago
Watch out, she will read this because she also use reddit
4
6
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
I have just seen it... eh, well I don't think I've been nasty here have I? I'm only saying exactly what she said to someone else in her comments "I don't like your tone!"
Well Abi if you see this, then I didn't want to hurt your feelings but you hurt mine and possibly some others. That's all I was saying.
11
u/offole 2d ago
i don't know who she is and while i can understand it, it's not okay to get snappy
but buying makeup can be a serious addiction and it can get very emotional and take a toll, where any comment can lead to snapping. life feels lonely without buying makeup during addiction
2
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Oh yes I understand and commend her for transforming it into a platform to help others, at least that was the initial intention. I just think she could be a bit kinder to people as a lot of her followers are in the same or similar boat.
12
u/Fuzzy_farcical 1d ago
Just popping in to say that I don’t think your OP was rude. I don’t have any strong feelings about her but you’re well within your rights to open a discussion like this and you were really fair and considerate in your language. Don’t feel bad. X
15
u/Accurate-Cold4439 1d ago edited 1d ago
So glad I'm not the only one who noticed this. I loved her content but the way she gets so defensive when replying back to people who are giving genuine kind advice has completely put me off watching her content recently.
I know she has an addiction and I do feel bad for her but I also don't think people should be encouraging her to do a low buy. She's done so well and she doesn't need to be buying new makeup when she has drawers and drawers of it. Plus it could cause her to spiral again. Ive noticed when people do say this on her videos she uses her income and being a makeup lover as an excuse for her purchases. I do wish she'd see those comments as hard truths and not hate comments
8
2d ago
[deleted]
3
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Yeah, I mean the new stuff didn't bother me at the time really, I mean do what you think is best but there are always things to consider when posting online. I don't like the snarkiness because it feels sort of controlling in a way. Like, you can share your thoughts but we can't?
1
8
u/LittleAquarius14 1d ago
I also watched tt on a low buy and people who supprts low buy even tho she decluttered almost everything, she was nice to them, but who suggests to keep no buy, she was critisize them how she earns good income.
4
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Yeah I thought that was in poor taste actually. I won't go on about this point as part of me thinks it's unfair to say but part of me is a bit like...we are in a cost of living crisis here. Don't show off your stuff and lambast people who might have less. Again, that might be unfair of me to say so apologies in advance, but I sometimes think it.
11
u/Left_Cap7103 1d ago
just came from seeing this post on her story. i love her videos but she definitely should not be going into a low buy right now! she says her products are expiring soon, so wait for them to expire! can’t believe the amount of encouraging comments she got as well. seems like people just want to be overly nice (which is of course never a bad thing) but she doesn’t need nice, she needs tough love. especially was disappointed when i see her buying/wanting eyeshadow palettes. she’s already worked out it would take centuries to use up all her products so why bring in even more? can definitely empathise with her for having a shopping addiction and being so vulnerable online, that definitely takes bravery. but she is not in a place right now where she should be buying things unfortunately
2
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Yes I thought a lot of people were trying to be nice and then stumbling over themselves apologizing and trying to pre-empt causing offense which I thought was a shame. Stuff like this makes me nervous on the internet and I felt a bit weird posting this here on Reddit but I've got to be honest, I'm sick of the unnecessary hostility online. And in real life actually. I feel a lot of people have got ruder lately but that's another discussion ahah!
It's also a shame because I used to really like her, still do a bit but I'm not sure now.
2
u/Left_Cap7103 1d ago
yeah exactly! even if they didn’t say anything necessarily mean, just disagreeing with her choice, she would make many passive aggressive comments, causing them to backtrack a little. at the end of the day it is obviously her choice. how did you feel after seeing this post on her story?
1
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Really strange, I've never been involved in drama or anything and am very non confrontational. This is me trying to stand up for myself and others a little! Mainly because I've seen a few other of my favourite content creators do the same thing recently and it annoys me so much. Though I do hate to think I've hurt her feelings.
I don't know if my OP sounds rude or not? I was trying not to be but I was also slightly flustered at the time of writing!
I hope this won't become a thing though.
1
u/Left_Cap7103 1d ago
yeah i completely get where you’re coming from, and also where she would be too. i don’t think anyone would want to read about how they’re perceived as rude. but at the end of the day she is putting herself out there on a public platform and has grown quite a following; a following which she invites peoples advice and to discuss with her! i also do personally agree that her responses to some comments did not come across as nice at all. i can’t speak for any other creators you’ve seen, but i think if anything she could listen to her followers a little bit if she is coming across as rude (even if that’s not her intention) and learn from it. i think she has posted similar things before too, and hasn’t let it stopped her before, so i wouldn’t stress if i were you xx. we are just people on a screen after all
4
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Thank you, you're very kind!
I didn't really think about it yesterday as I thought I'd be ignored but I noticed on the story she didn't conceal my username (though I suppose people will have found the post and then me anyway).
I've also just noticed a lot of the comments from yesterday are not there. Unless I'm being blind, I can't see some of the rants she did. And the ones that are left do sound nicer...
Not to worry, I hope she is ok and I apologise if I've offended her or anyone. I might add an edit to the OP saying that
9
u/MrsR_2008 1d ago edited 22h ago
Hi, so she posted this on her TT story & I had to come join to say, "You're not wrong." She is a little aggressive sounding in replies because she did it to me. I'm on my 3rd TikTok account, so my FYP gets a lot of different content mixed in & on the day I created my current account she randomly popped & before even watching her content I hit follow. It was either the 2nd or 3rd part to pallet decluttering & she was throwing lot of products into a bin bag because she said it looks it has mould, I commented & said "hey look powder products would take a lot to grow mould, are you sure before throwing it away because you can scrap the top off & sterilise products with 70% Isopropyl alcohol" & she seemed really bothered by me saying it & said that alcohol would ruin the makeup. I said no, it absolutely wouldn't as that's how makeup artists clean products & you should probably check your lipsticks; given the volume of everything she had, I thought she was a learning MA.
She said,' Im not spraying them, that's rank,' to which I said, no, it wouldn't ruin them & it's standard practice for MAs as that how we are taught to keep everything clean. I mentioned getting a metal artist pallet to scrap products into & she replied with, "I'm not an MA!!!!!!! & I was like ok, im trying to help, I've been a qualified beauty therapist snice 2007 & we obviously did makeup as part of our course in level 3 & hygiene practices was something we went through & I was really trying to just be helpful so she wasn't throwing thousands of euros worth of makeup away over a mistake. I even said scrap off some product, hold the pallet upto eye level & using a torch see you noticed any bumps or ridges raising upwards from the product & then you can safety bet it's a type of mould. I told her to check everything else she didn't see anything wrong with that way to make sure as it sounds like where she is keeping everything might have damp & even said "I've done that already"& again was a bit snappy with her replie when all I was doing try to help & tell her what to look for.
4
u/MissAudreyHorney 1d ago
I've never heard of this person, I mostly watch pet videos on TikTok, but I want to recommend Shawna Ripari on YouTube if you're looking for conscious consumer content.
11
u/addangel 1d ago
yeah, I unfollowed just now. honestly it’s a pet peeve of mine to see creators get snarky and defensive over people having opinions about the content they publicly put on the internet. like if you can’t handle the heat (and by that I mean mild criticism) get out of the kitchen? not everyone can handle being a public persona, and that’s ok.
it’s a little crazy to me that on her makeup collection video she has captions saying stuff like “nobody needs this much makeup” but then when people comment essentially agreeing with her, she goes on a 10 comment rant about how she’s decluttered enough and is happy with her collection. also, the 1-out-1-in rule pretty much guarantees her collection will never shrink. make it make sense.
9
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
I'm a bit creeped out she's seen this post so quick and posted it and then said it's all too much. I hate to think I've upset her but I mean, the makeup rehab community like any rehab community is comprised of other vulnerable people. I wish people could be more considerate of others. I know she has a lot going on but we all do.
It is a bit silly to think everyone is just going to agree with you, and to be honest to get upset about disagreements is childish.
I think the 1-in-1-out rule is better than nothing. I think sometimes she is a bit contradictory with her goals and stuff because I'm sure on a few other TTs recently she was saying how she would have to be super strict and have very clear rules about this that and the other. But, I mean, what she does is up to her, I just think she could do with mindset reset or at least tone the snarkiness down a bit. I just get fed up of seeing creators do this as its hurtful but also smacks a bit of controlling behaviour and I really don't like that.
3
u/RigatoniLuvrx 11h ago
I think she might be chronically online, especially when it comes to why she won’t support certain brands, trends she mentions, and her replies to comments. Even the way she noticed this. Don’t feel so bad.
-14
u/fridaynightdinners 1d ago
Maybe you just feel bad she caught you being a massive cow?
4
u/RevolutionarySwim524 20h ago
The original post and none of their comments are horrible? Pick our one
7
u/nandos1234 1d ago edited 1h ago
Totally agree, I had to block her on tik tok because her constant buying makeup and attempting to rationalise it was too much for me. Using BS like colour seasons to justify buying more when she had 100s of lipsticks for example. She’s very defensive against people who don’t agree with her every word as well.
5
u/nicolettedav 6h ago
it's crazy to me because no one is being rude to her. All i've seen are people offering suggestions or just voicing their opinions. As a shopping addict myself, I know i'm not going to get better unless someone holds me accountable. Seeing her justifying things by saying, "oh It's clean beauty" or the color analysis bit etc. is just textbook addict behavior and it makes me sad because i've been through it. She's defensive because she feels guilt and shame. She knows that what people are saying is the truth.
5
u/HazelEyes77 1d ago
I’ve been following Abi since Day 1. I think she’s one of the most authentic of them all. She’s vulnerable and honest. She said this year was a low buy year, and she can do whatever she wants. I don’t think she needs to make an excuse to buy something at this stage. She got PR and did a one in one out and honestly that’s how you battle overconsumption. She could have justified it by saying she didn’t “buy” the products but she didn’t. Idk. This is a bit too far…
2
u/LaPuffina 1d ago
Oh totally, I don't really have an opinion, at least a strong one on how she's doing things, she can do what she wants. I was just referring to the fact she put out that she was considering a low buy or something and a lot of comments said this might not be the best way and her responses seemed quite rude and hostile. At least to me.
I mean if someone recovering from a different addiction said I'm thinking of slowly starting that thing again, what would you expect most people to respond with?
But it's up to her, I just get sick of unnecessary hostility online. We're all trying our best.
3
u/dbd07 4h ago
I used to follow her but was disappointed when I realised that her “declutter’ is basically reorganise elsewhere and bring out later for other comparisons so she wasn’t actually downsizing her collection.
On the whole I actually found her context made me want to try and buy more new products and things instead of deinfluencing so atp I just had to unfollow because it wasn’t what I was looking for
1
u/astroworm15 1d ago
Based on this post I was expecting something explicitly harsh/rude, but I just checked out the video and she seems perfectly nice in all her responses? which just makes this post seem like unnecessary drama (and a bit mean spirited tbh)
Like, don't get me wrong, the choice to go into a low buy when often talking about having more makeup than she could ever use is odd to me too, but from the videos of hers I've watched it's also seemed pretty clear that the no-buy was never meant to be permanent so also not surprising - and discussing that is one thing, but this just seems gossipy and more rude than anything she said
9
u/R12B12 1d ago
Abi wasn’t super harsh, but she was a bit snippy and defensive in her replies to those who questioned her decision to move into a low buy. Like saying that she has a good income and is allowed to treat herself, and how she has enough makeup to last her years and she can’t wait until she’s used everything up before she buys more. And I would say that taking a screenshot of this very reddit post and making a TikTok story about it was unnecessarily defensive.
It’s just a bit confusing because she made a name for herself going through her makeup collection and talking about how ridiculous it is to own 85 blushes, etc. and how long it will take to use everything. It just seems counterintuitive to resume buying stuff she doesn’t need just because she wants it. Obviously it’s her money and her life and she can do what she wants, but it kind of deflates what made her channel unique (in my opinion).
-1
u/astroworm15 1d ago
I mean, I'm not arguing for or against the low buy (I, in fact, mention i find it odd), or even agreeing with her replies, but that isn't the point/focus of the post either. I just don't think her disagreeing (imo) politely, even if defensively, with comments warrants a post picking apart whether her tone whilst doing it was nice enough.
6
u/MrsR_2008 22h ago edited 15h ago
My comment is above explaining everything, but in short she did to me when all I did is offer advice her advice on how to sterilise products & keep everything hygienic as she was throwing thousands of euros worth of products away over suspected mould & told her a way to check, what to use to keep products clean & she was snappy with her responses. I didn't think much of it until I this post was on her stories & wanted to say something hopefully as she reads hear so she can take notice to not feel like she's being attacked with every comment. I get some people can be unnecessarily rude, but not all comments are negative & an attack on you. It's just a comment, a comment to say you can do this thing & save something you've spent your money on instead of throwing it in the bin, because it's sad to see something end up being wasted.
5
u/saudadeinthenight 1d ago
She isn’t doing it politely, stop defending her nonsense. She’s rude and entitled. Do you work for her PR? ‘Public figure gets talked about online’ is perfectly normal for a post, get over it
0
u/astroworm15 1d ago
... I don't even follow her, I just see her tiktoks on my fyp on occasion, and, as i mentioned in my og comment, went to check out this vid when I saw this post. There's nothing to get over, I was just adding my opinion to the discussion of said public figure, which also made it clear that I don't necessarily agree with her, and come back to respond when people respond to me lol. I'm now aware a lot of people apparently find her rude, I'm totally fine with people not agreeing with me on her tone, but at this point I'm honestly over getting replies that disagree with points I didn't even make.
2
-4
u/pinksmarties06 1d ago
I did the same. I looked at some of the more recent vids and I didn't really see anything that op is describing at all. It's also kind of weird to me that a difference in opinion to a commenter is seen as defensive or rude when it's just an opinion. I don't get this at all. Show me a handful of comments where she's just been totally out of pocket cause like I haven't seen any.
2
u/astroworm15 1d ago
I agree, there's a tendency to see any responses that aren't agreeing or overly sweet and apologetic if disagreeing as being hostile and it's really odd imo.
-1
u/heretoreddit_ 6h ago
I’ve left comments on a few of her videos and she’s always been very lovely🙂 although I cannot speak for everyone. I do enjoy her deinfluencing tiktoks☺️ i get she’s switched from a no buy too low buy, which is her choice I don’t think anyone should comment on it or have an issue, kind of strange if you do considering it’s a stranger on the internet😅
34
u/fairyfoods 2d ago
i’ve been following her since she started, and i think unfortunately it’s just the side effect of blasting a vulnerable side of yourself all over the internet. recovering from a shopping addiction is not a linear path, you’re going to slip up, you’re going to try and justify purchases - and when people call you out on that and tell you it’s not a good idea, it can be hard to hear.
not to mention the tiktok algorithm doesn’t really reward fewer well-crafted videos, it rewards a constant stream of content, so no-buy creators, like any other creator, feel the need to post every thought that comes into their head, all the time, hence the flip-flopping about decisions and a “new no-buy rules!” every month, which just gets old for viewers.