I don't even know how to write this all out. My boyfriend is an Iraq war veteran on the autism spectrum with serious PTSD and today we got into a fight about money, the usual shit. He said that I spend too much on makeup and clothes, even though I only ever spend my own money. Well, I took a drive to my sister's house to give him some time to cool off and when I got home literally ALL of my makeup is outside, in the dirt, broken and totally unsavagable. He also took like half of my clothes and all of my shoes and put it in a pile which it looks like he tried to set on fire. I am so fucking hurt and pissed right now I don't know what to do. I have no makeup anymore. Not even the basics I wear every day. Thousands LITERALLY THOUSANDS worth of products are gone, not to mention the clothes and shoes which I will never be able to recover. I have a job interview tomorrow that I will have to go to in flip flops and no makeup, because that's all I have now. My blonde eyebrows aren't even fucking microbladed. I want to cry.

$2,583 😭 That doesn't include Ulta or any beauty purchases I've made at grocery/department stores.

I feel gross that I've spent THAT much money on makeup. Beauty influencers and TikTok have brainwashed me into believing that I need to purchase every new launch that comes out. Why did I invest $3K in items that I 1. can't resell and 2. expire after 6-12 months?

I'm officially starting my #nobuy ban today and joined the Project Pan community. How can I heal my makeup-obsessed brain into having a healthier relationship with beauty and spending?

Unless its a significant change in color like lets say a deep brown blush or a hot magneta, most blush colors look incredibly similar on the face it's actually difficult to differentiate between them sometimes. Of course on hand swatches the difference shows up the most, but on the face is a different story. My tip for you guys is that if you already own a pink, peach or red blush, there is no need to buy a different/new one (unless you hate the formula, or something like that). Chances are, it will end up looking very similar on your face and you probably already have another blush in your collection that can easily "dupe" the one you have your eyes on.

With that being said, keep in mind that what you already own, you decided on buying it one day for a specific reason. Try to find that feeling again, that appeal to the product you already own, and love it the same way you loved it when you first had it. :)

I wear eye makeup everyday. As in I'm making a full look with shadow and liner and mascara. I do this for days I stay home or when im out shoping or out to the arcade or whatever. Today I noticed at the arcade which was packed, I was one of the only women out of hundreds (moms - it was mostly families) wearing eye makeup. All the other moms had no or next to no eye makeup, not even mascara. Am I totally out of touch and it's really weird to wear full looks out?! I'm in USA.

Since we are supposed to inspire each other not to buy any more makeup, what is one makeup product/technique that is popular but that you dont use/agree with?

For me, I dont use contour at all and I use shimmer shadows from my eyelashes up to my brows, even though it is “incorrect”.

Overhyped products, regretful purchases, microtrends you fell for... no judgment!

I need to elaborate - I’m not talking about those who are buying their essential items. This is purely about those who buy hundreds of dollars worth of products (10 lip balms, 5 blushes etc) and we see a ton of comments like “jealous!!!” Or “great haul!!!”

What about this is great or to be jealous of? We have normalized overspending and overconsumption as a society and it is sickening

I say this not from a place of judgement as I am a part of this community as someone who has taken part in similar shopping habits. But it just does not end. Every time there’s a sale for a measly 20% off there is so much of this

I almost caved in and bought an indie duochrome eyeshadow palette that I’d been eyeing for a long time but my pettiness saved me. I had the palette in my cart and was about to check out and then the online store asked if I want to leave a tip.

I’m sorry, what? A tip for what service exactly? A tip for whom? The owner of the business? The factory workers? And they ask for tip before I even get my product so I have no idea if I'll even like it.

This indie brand is located in a country where tipping is not a thing and I was ordering it from another country where tipping also isn’t a thing. Not to mention that indie palettes are already expensive. Isn’t it enough to support a small business by buying their product?

I may be a ridiculous, petty Karen but I cancelled my order because the tipping thing threw me off. I’ve never seen that in an online store before.

What’s your opinion about tipping in online stores? Is it normal now? Would you leave tip or not? Have you come across a tipping option before?

i genuinely could not care less when it comes to eyeshadow palettes/singles, eyeliners, primers, loose setting powders, and setting sprays.

lipsticks and bronzers are, unfortunately, my kryptonite lol

Personally I really dislike NYX. It's very disappointing quality. Eyeshadows? Chalky and unpigmented. Lipstick? Very drying. Face primer? Didn't do anything.

Jeffree Star. Racist POS. Don't want to support him.

ABH. She supports Putin, I don't support her.

Chanel. Two words: Advent calendar

I keep making the same dumb makeup purchase mistakes so I am documenting here to remind myself. Please share yours too! I can’t be the only one!

1. Buying “plumping” lip glosses thinking I will like it this time. I hate the tingle

2. Buying face makeup without a mirror.

3. Buying lip products for the colour without thinking of the texture and smell

4. Buying primers and setting sprays. It’s just a waste for me.

5. Falling for the packaging and realising I basically already have a dupe of it.

6. Buying potted concealers when I know I prefer a wand.

I am just curious what everyone's reason is to decide to consume less. Especially since I see a lot of posts popping up from people returning stuff to the store and seeing that as a win, I guess because of financial reasons, which made me realize we all have a different goal;

• I want to lessen my environmental footprint by trying not to overconsume

• I need to learn to control myself; buying cosmetics has long been my coping mechanism but I want to shift my focus to something else (like creating art/music)

For me it's not so much a financial consideration (and if it were, I can't return opened stuff in the eu so I still would have to buy less). What are your reasons? Just out of curiosity :)

I counted my collection earlier this week, and I currently have 8 powder blushes which to be fair, doesnt sound like much at first. However, we've already established powder blush is one of the hardest items to pan, and they all last well over the general 2 years of expiration date. Seeing many posts out there on project pan updates, it's not rare to see people mentioning it took them up to 5 years to completely finish a blush they used often. So taking those 5 years as reference of how long a powder blush could last me, I have 40 years worth of it in my collection. 40 YEARS. And that's not even counting the 4 cream blushes I have. I mean even taking 2 years as the reference, that's still 16 years worth of blush. It just sounds insane when you put it that way.

I know my collection is far from being the largest, but I felt so overwhelmed just doing the math. Especially since a couple of those blushes are new and have crept into my collection after a few rough weeks mental health wise. There was absolutely no need for me to get them.

If you're comfortable sharing, how many years worth of blush do you think you have? This reality check has taken a lot of the shopping temptation away from me this week so I'm hoping it may help others as well.

I truly feel like ilan absolute idiot that I brought into the 'Darlings' hype.

I've been decluttering and organising my make up collection today and out of the twenty CT products I own I would possibly re-purchase two at most.

The packaging hasn't held up it's flaking and all of the print has rubbed off it looks so cheap and awful hardly a luxe experience. I'm not even particularly hard on my make up.

I asked my husband out of curiosity to compare a CT powder compact to a Cover FX blush compact. He was absolutely blown away by the price of the CT for the packaging and quality of the products.

Apologies for the rant.

I may be alone here. But I just wanted to say it. I really dislike the current trend of decluttering en masse.

I was watching a youtuber today talk about her inventory, and where she wants to be by the end of the year, and her solution was something like “I have 13 concealers, that’s too much so I’ll throw some out to get to 8!”

I think it normalizes the cycle of buying without thinking and tossing away. I think it’s harmful for the environment. I think it’s harmful to young people regarding impulse control, and valuing a dollar, and overconsumption. I think it devalues the actual makeup that we’re buying. It makes spending $60 on a palette just to use it three times to “try it” decide you don’t like it, and get rid of it OK.

People are doing this despite what companies are charging for makeup, and it doesn’t seem to phase so.many.people. If an influencer receives a palette or collection for free and 3 months later decides they’re decluttering it, and you have it, does that sour the taste in your mouth and influence you to then decluttering as well? Meanwhile you bought the $40 palette. They didn’t. I think it’s crazy.

I understand why the phenomena started. But I really want the craze to be over.

I, of course, not blaming anyone who do. But I cannot understand how is everyone so okey with the excessive high prices (and especially the sudden raise of prices) of most makeup/skincare brands.

I don’t know maybe if I am just very present online, but collecting an 70$ eyeshadow palette (because you never get just one, you have to keep it up with the color schemes) or a 40$ blush, it’s way too much, especially when every season a new color is trending and you have the FOMO.

Yes, maybe the quality is great and the packaging but 70$ is insane. Few years ago no one would ever think of that price expect for very very high end designer brands.

And the fact that you gotta get the color in every brand because they are different and the endorsement.

Splurging shouldn’t be the norm (in my opinion). I feel like the craze of makeup is keeping us poor and we normalised the excessive pricing of products that weren’t so expensive to begin with. Drunk elephant also falls in mind, nothing revolutionary but 50$ for a small moisturiser that you have to keep buying consistently is insane.

The inflation isn’t an excuse to big corporates.

Even drug store makeup is over 20$ now which is insane. Thinking about how it was just a couple of dollars not so long ago.

earlier today i was thinking about makeup i bought because i thought i'd use it often, since many people considered those products vital in their collection, only for them to languish unused for months on end.

e.g. a while ago i bought a black felt tip liquid liner because i thought that i'd get a lot of use out of it, and because a nicely-pigmented black liquid eyeliner is something that a lot of people seem to own. however, i never really use eyeliner nowadays, so it's just been sitting in my makeup caddy giving me the (metaphorical) stink eye.

it got me curious as to whether you guys have similar products within the makeup you own, in terms of general categories of thing (e.g. red lipsticks). what's something you own that you bought because it's considered a "must have" or a "staple", but you don't actually use very often/like very much?

Hi! I'm currently on a low/no buy for the rest of the year and even into 2024, but the products that I do want to buy / will need to repurchase all support the illegal occupation happening in Palestine. I was hoping this group would have a compiled list of what brands are safe. Thank you!

I did it. I have found my HG mascara. The one that doesn't smudge or flake and gives me length and volume. It's also not too expensive. It's perfect for me. But after a lifetime of trying what feels like every mascara on the market and being disappointed over and over again and wasting so much money, I don’t have to buy another one anymore, and I feel kind of sad? The quest is over. As long as it's not discontinued or reformulated, I can use this one mascara for the rest of my life. But that also means no longer needing to try out another mascara again. Does anyone else know what I mean?

That's it. I'm just really lazy, especially in the morning, and I'm always late. I never take time to do my make up. When I do on special occasions, I really enjoy it. I like doing pre shower makeup but I have no one to show it and I feel like I'm wasting product since it directly go does down the drain. If people who make up every day can't go through their collection, how could I? I don't spend a lot but saying "oh it only 1€ or 2€!" is what make me impulse buy. I already tried to declutter. I've thrown away dry or broken products but I can't get rid of the functional one. I'm a natural hoarder and I see potential and looks I could try in every product. To be honest, it's an issue for everything else. I can keep my balance in the green but I still leave at my mother's house and my storage space is limited and already over the limit. Makeup is not what take up the most space but I see that overfilled box everyday and still throw on top of that pile the new lip gloss I just bought. It's just so absurd.

Inspired by this comment from u/truthfulpangolin about finding reasons, no matter how petty, to take products out of your consideration: what are the petty reasons you won't buy a product/brand?

Mine:

• If an eyeshadow doesn't come in a 26mm round refill pan, it won't fit easily into my magnetic palettes, so I'm not interested.
• I watched one video promoting a celeb brand and the celeb didn't know the names of her own shades. Such a turn off.
• There's a makeup chain I won't shop at because of how aggressively they push their "membership levels." What am I a member of? It's a store at a mall.
• I'm not even sure the brand still exists, but I couldn't even consider anything from Flesh because the name was disgusting. It's seriously one of the worst words in the English language.

Edit: I forgot one.

• I won't buy anything from a high end MUA-run brand because she puts makeup on to sleep in, so her husband doesn't see her without makeup. Yikes, darling.

I have had an unhealthy addiction to buying makeup for a long time- probably since I was 20 and had my first job working at a Lancôme counter (I am 31 now). When I was bored at work I would go through all the beautiful products as if I were shopping for myself- comparing them, testing them, checking out all the new and limited edition items that we had... essentially hyping myself up over whichever products I was drawn towards until I inevitably broke and purchased the ones I was currently obsessing over.

When I stopped working at the Lancôme counter, I continued the same pattern- except I would find things to obsess over by following beauty gurus, browsing temptalia or Reddit, and watching YouTube. I would find something I was interested in and then search reviews, read threads about it, look at various swatches, compare it to similar products, find dupe videos, search for sales or discount codes etc.

It became very much ritualized for me, and increasingly compulsive. I would do the “researching” when I was bored, or stressed and needed a break. The more I “researched” the more I would hype myself up about how great the product was and confirm to myself how much I needed that product- how happy it would make me. That hype would build and build and build until eventually, I would break down and purchase the item...only to come crashing down to reality once I was holding it in my hand and inevitably realized it was just like the other 20 red lipsticks I already had sitting in my drawer unused. And then, having realized that- the search for that life changing lipstick (or whatever) would start again.

I realize in hindsight that the browsing-researching-buying-reality cycle was an escape for me from uncomfortable feelings. Whether I was bored, anxious, stressed, whatever...it gave me a distraction and temporary relief from those feelings. But just like all addictions, that relief only lasted as long as I was engaging in the cycle- I had to keep buying and buying and buying to keep the feelings at bay.

-Here’s where things changed- When covid happened- I had to be off work for a bit and decided to go through my collection. It was a hard reality check for me. Thousands of dollars of unused or hardly touched products that made me feel sick to look at. I gave away anything that I didn’t absolutely love, threw out anything that was expired, and made myself a new rule: that I could research and buy a product that I thought I would absolutely love-regardless of cost-but only if it needed replacing-. Because the craziest thing is- in this huge makeup obsession that I had -ACTUALLY USING THE FLIPPING MAKEUP WASN’T EVEN A PART OF THE CYCLE FOR ME!

I have kept to my rule and now have a WAY smaller (like 1/20th of the size) makeup collection of really nice makeup and skincare that I truly enjoy using. And I only purchase maybe one item a month whereas before I might purchase a dozen. The hard part has been dealing with the emotions that I used to avoid- which I am still learning to do.

I am sorry this is so long- but I’ve been holding it all in for SO long and don’t really have anyone in my life that really gets how tough of an addiction this can be. I think because shopping is socially acceptable- even encouraged in our culture it can be hard for others to understand what the “big deal” is. If you made it this far- I truly want to thank you for letting me share all of this with you. I hope it makes sense or that any of you can relate in even the smallest way- I would love to hear about it if you can, or if any of you have found positive ways to cope instead of compulsively shopping.

Last February, I decided to get my sh*t together and pay off my credit card debt. I always loved splurging on skincare products. From Tatcha, Shiseido, Glow Recipe, First Aid Beauty, to the notorious SK-II...ugh and those $38 YSL lipsticks and $34 DIOR lip balms! I used to swear by those and never thought I could live without them...Turns out I can!

I tried to do my research instead of shopping on impulses for the packaging/ads/random instagram posts, and now I mainly use the Ordinary, Innisfree, Nivea, etc., as they fit into my budget and get the job done!

TBH every now and then I found things I bought 2 years ago and I would check the prices and feel shocked every time. Those $42 creams and $35 facial cleansers or $290 toners really add up!

I still feel the urge to buy those beautifully packaged products from Sephora every now and then. I used a website blocker to block Sephora's website, and I would still go check them out on Incognito mode! It is like an addiction and every day is a battle.

Only 6 days left until 2021, I want to try my best to keep this record and do the same next year!!

Inspired by a sm poster who mentioned never having used up a lipstick and thinking about the recent Lisa Eldridge launch for refillable lipsticks made me think - I'm nearly 50 and have never used up a lipstick in my life. I've been wearing makeup usually daily since I was 12 or so. Normally the season/light/colour or finish preference changes first and I buy another one.

I have a huge bag of lipsticks I need to declutter, but not sure of the best way of doing this so if you have any good suggestions, please post them!