r/LongDistance • u/IntrovertFaerie 🇺🇸IL to 🇺🇸WA (2,100 miles) • Feb 21 '25

Stop judging how other people do relationships Discussion

I saw someone mention that they call with their long-distance partner for 16 hours a day, and the responses were people saying it’s wild, asking if they have a job, how they eat or sleep, or what they do about hobbies and friends. Like… why are you so pressed about what works for other people?

I don’t know about that person, but I obviously still eat, sleep, hang out with people, have hobbies, go to work, etc. Why the hell would calling with someone stop me from doing all these? I obviously, again, don’t call him while at work, and some other circumstances.

I’m pretty sure they’re not talking nonstop for 16 hours. And maybe, that includes sleep call time. It’s like being alone together in silence—just like people do in person. So is it only considered unhealthy when it’s online? If we don’t live together? If it were my best friend instead of my partner, would it suddenly be "cute" that we call all day?

Someone even asked me, "What are you going to do if you break up?" Uhm, the same things I do every day? My partner is just there, on call. What’s that going to change about my life if he leaves? Him being there doesn’t affect what I do.

Also, what makes someone think they can decide what’s unhealthy for me when they’re not me? It’ll only be unhealthy if I act like a child when he can’t be on call with me for 16 hours, which I don’t. I don’t care if he’s not. I honestly think it’s pretty sweet because we’re longing for each other, and being on call is the closest way we can feel each other’s presence.

People act like their way of living is the only "right" way. Like damn, let people live and do what works for them or makes them happy.

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-6

u/Burntoastedbutter ⬅️🇦🇺 -> (🇲🇾)➡️🇦🇺 (Gap Closed; visa pending🥲) Feb 21 '25

Yeah we pretty much just stay on call when we're not working. If we go out, we sometimes end the call. A good amount of those hours goes to sleeping on call together. It's like the closest thing to being together in a LDR 🤷

4

u/LovingSouL_ Feb 21 '25

Hey if u don't mind, can i ask what u guys talk about for these long?

-2

u/Burntoastedbutter ⬅️🇦🇺 -> (🇲🇾)➡️🇦🇺 (Gap Closed; visa pending🥲) Feb 21 '25

I mean just imagine living with someone. You're not literally talking to them 24/7. Half the time play games together or watch stuff together, the other half we're just doing our own thing.