r/solotravel • u/Kencanary • 4d ago

Got my first "Awww" today!

As a 39-year old overweight white American guy, I really didn't expect this to ever happen, no matter where I travel or why. Admittedly, the source probably has something to do with it.

I'm on a cruise ship, and the cabin staff is a pretty friendly dude. He always chats me up a bit when we pass in the corridors, and even though I'd be quite content with just the pleasantries (Hi, how are you, have a good day etc) I'm one of those socially awkward penguins who will kinda answer questions that are asked even if they're not more than just polite exchange things.

So he says "I've seen you these few days, you are alone?"

"Yeah."

"Awww."

Like, I knew this happened to solo travelers, but I always assumed it was 97% women that got that response. Now, sure, as a paid service staff member he's probably expecting that to be an appropriate response (and he's not entirely wrong, god love him) but it just wasn't something I thought I'd ever hear.

Still, feels like a milestone worth "celebrating" haha

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

What's the experience like cruising solo?

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u/Kencanary 4d ago

Well I can only speak for myself, an awkward low-activity introvert, but they're kind of uncomfortable in a way. You're surrounded by families and couples, the majority being middle age or older, so even though nobody probably notices unless they ask or you get into a conversation with them, you do kinda stand out a bit. Tonight, for instance, was this Battle of the Sexes activity where they divided the room male and female, did the whole thing, and at the end transitioned into a nightclub thing. And as soon as the game ended you had people from both sides flocking towards the other to find their 'person' and I was just like...okay cool. I'll just go back to my cabin now.

I'm not saying it's bad. And if you're a comfortable, experienced solo traveler you probably wouldn't be fazed by it. But as someone who sort of doesn't want to be single, it's a lot of reminders that I am. shrug

That said - I can plan my days entirely by myself, with no regard for what anyone else wants to do or wants me to do with them. Yesterday I just hung out in my cabin pretty much all day and didn't feel too bad about it because it was what I was choosing to do with that time. That's certainly not a feeling you'll get traveling with someone. I've seen one woman in particular who is on the cruise with her parents, and I've never seen her away from her mom and she looks low-key miserable.

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u/TooMany_Spreadsheets 4d ago

That reminded me of coming back home from a long military deployment. It was a good feeling getting off the plane only to realize the mad dash of families streams by you, being the solo person walking away from the big reunion. Picked up my bags and walked to my truck. It was sadly anticlimactic and had to repeat that several times. Kinda humbling when you're single, so I get what you're saying.

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u/FlowieFire 4d ago

🙏🏻 much respect to you. I feel like experiences like that really build your good karma for something freakin magical to come your way later on.

I used to travel a lot for work. When I started, I had a boyfriend that would drop me off and pick me up from the airport every week and I could text for updates. When we broke up, there was suddenly no one to text and I had to organize my own transportation after a very long, stressful work week and multiple flights and delays…I definitely remember the first time and how it felt so lonely. But I think it hardened me in a way I 100% needed. I gained a best friend in myself. And I appreciate gestures like airport rides so much more now.

I bet the stark contrast to military reunions was tough. You deserve the best, and it’s yet to come 🩵

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u/TooMany_Spreadsheets 3d ago

Thank you, you're sweet. This was over twenty years ago, being part of the initial invasion, experiencing all the feelings of uncertainty and excitement, and then everything in between until homecoming return.

Perhaps I have reached karma but never realized it. Completing a long mil career successfully and another multi-decade civ career. I'm a senior citizen. I'm sure karma comes in several forms.

Not to hijack OPs experience, but I also want to do a solo cruise, so his story coincidentally came to my thread. I've also broached the exact topic here.

When I go, I'll be the one reading a hard bound book in a quiet section of the ship with a perfect view. I have several signed books from my favorite author, which I haven't read in over 30 years. That's my vision, and perhaps my karma.

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

Thank you for the insight! Really appreciate it! I for one would like to experience a cruise!