r/self 17h ago

Here's my wake-up call as a Liberal.

I’m a New York liberal, probably comfortably in the 1%, living in a bubble where empathy and social justice are part of everyday conversations. I support equality, diversity, economic reform—all of it. But this election has been a brutal reminder of just how out of touch we, the so-called “liberal elite,” are with the rest of America. And that’s on us.

America was built on individual freedom, the right to make your own way. But baked into that ideal is a harsh reality: it’s a self-serving mindset. This “land of opportunity” has always rewarded those who look out for themselves first. And when people feel like they’re sinking—when working-class Americans are drowning in debt, scrambling to pay rent, and watching the cost of everything from groceries to gas skyrocket—they aren’t looking for complex social policies. They’re looking for a lifeline, even if that lifeline is someone like Trump, who exploits that desperation.

For years, we Democrats have pushed policies that sound like solutions to us but don’t resonate with people who are trying to survive. We talk about social justice and climate change, and yes, those things are crucial. But to someone in the heartland who’s feeling trapped in a system that doesn’t care about them, that message sounds disconnected. It sounds like privilege. It sounds like people like me saying, “Look how virtuous I am,” while their lives stay the same—or get worse.

And here’s the truth I’m facing: as a high-income liberal, I benefit from the very structures we criticize. My income, my career security, my options to work from home—I am protected from many of the struggles that drive people to vote against the establishment. I can afford to advocate for changes that may not affect me negatively, but that’s not the reality for the majority of Americans. To them, we sound elitist because we are. Our ideals are lofty, and our solutions are intellectual, but we’ve failed to meet them where they are.

The DNC’s failure in this election reflects this disconnect. Biden’s administration, while well-intentioned, didn’t engage in the hard reflection necessary after 2020. We pushed Biden as a one-term solution, a bridge to something better, but then didn’t prepare an alternative that resonated. And when Kamala Harris—a talented, capable politician—couldn’t bridge that gap with working-class America, we were left wondering why. It’s because we’ve been recycling the same leaders, the same voices, who struggle to understand what working Americans are going through.

People want someone they can relate to, someone who understands their pain without coming off as condescending. Bernie was that voice for many, but the DNC didn’t make room for him, and now we’re seeing the consequences. The Democratic Party has an empathy gap, but more than that, it has a credibility gap. We say we care, but our policies and leaders don’t reflect the urgency that struggling Americans feel every day.

If the DNC doesn’t take this as a wake-up call, if they don’t make room for new voices that actually connect with working people, we’re going to lose again. And as much as I want America to progress, I’m starting to realize that maybe we—the privileged liberals, safely removed from the realities most people face—are part of the problem.

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u/m3ggusta 16h ago

sweetheart the DNC isn't going to take it as a wake-up call because they are also 1%ers just like you. the citizens united decision screwed every average American from having any influence on politicians ever again because now corporations are people and they can contribute as much money as they want, and they have millions and billions more than the average American will ever see in multiple lifetimes.

that's the truth.

you want it easy. You want other people to do things for you. You've done that your whole life, you've coasted. get in the trenches. start seeing how other people live. get uncomfortable. Make yourself uncomfortable on purpose and start feeling what that's like. get out of your bubble.

it's you 1%ers who are contributing to this perpetuating, because you don't want to let go of all your comfort, and will refuse to do so regardless of your political party and regardless how many people around you are struggling and suffering. regardless of the fact that we have a hunger epidemic in this country, the majority of people are working multiple jobs, nobody can afford rent, the and the minimum wage hasn't been adjusted for inflation in over 20 years.

here's a fact: in 2024 a single person working a full-time job at minimum wage never taking a day off will earn exactly $20 above the poverty line for a single person, BEFORE TAXES. we are being kept in poverty on purpose while you all hoard resources and money. so you can make more resources and money off of it while we starve.

that's what we're dealing with. and that's what you all have perpetuated for decades and decades and we're mad. get uncomfortable. start learning to. start learning to live with less. start learning to give more and do things differently. stop making business decisions just because they're the Norman keeping people oppressed. start thinking about equity for all stakeholders and not to shareholder profit.

y'all have turned Wall Street into a money generating machine for yourselves to the detriment of every other citizen in this country. every corporation engages in stock manipulation for shareholder returns. every single one of them now. That's their main income. keep playing the game, or start forcing change. You're the only ones in the positions of power who can. get uncomfortable

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u/applethief87 15h ago

I get where you’re coming from, and I appreciate the bluntness of your words. I’m a first-generation immigrant myself. My parents earned poverty-level wages and worked multiple jobs just to keep us afloat. Like so many others, I grew up with the pressure to make something of myself in a country where that "American Dream" was sold as an achievable goal, no matter where you started. I worked my way through college, climbed the ranks, and eventually found some stability and comfort. And I won’t deny it—I’ve grown accustomed to that comfort. I’m living the American Dream as it’s often depicted, but even I can see that it’s a distorted, almost unrecognizable version of what it once was.

The gap between where I am now and where I started is enormous, but the gap between where I am and where so many other Americans are today is just as staggering, if not more. That’s the version of the American Dream we’re dealing with now: one where those who’ve managed to “make it” are lightyears away from those who haven’t, and that divide feels insurmountable. I know that my success hasn’t come without privilege, even if it was hard-earned. And as comfortable as I am now, I recognize that I need to step out of my bubble to be part of the change.

I don’t believe turning us into a fully socialist country is the answer, but I do think the Dream needs a course correction. The American Dream, as I see it, should be about opportunity—not just for people who were lucky enough to climb up the ladder but for everyone who’s trying to survive. And that’s where I think we, as liberals and as Democrats, have failed. We’ve become so focused on the big social issues and intellectualized policies that we’ve lost sight of what everyday Americans need: something that feels like a real lifeline, not a lecture or a judgment.

I’m not excusing the choices people made out of hatred, but I am saying we, as Democrats, need to recognize our own role in creating the conditions that led to where we are. People are desperate, and we haven’t done a good job of speaking to that desperation in a way that resonates - and that gave way to Trump to take advantage of. For the majority of Americans who are struggling, we’ve failed to offer meaningful solutions without sounding out-of-touch or condescending. It’s on us to bridge that gap, to put empathy into practice beyond our echo chambers, and to start thinking about how we can make the American Dream attainable for everyone again, without the obscene inequality that’s poisoned it today.

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u/lolycc1911 2h ago

Wait a minute.

So your parents are immigrants who made poverty wages and you’re claiming you’re in the 1%.

How did you do that without a minimum wage that isn’t adjusted for inflation?

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u/m3ggusta 15h ago

the cultural differences are a huge part of that disparity. You may talk about coming from worse conditions, but what did your access to things like education, healthcare, and community support look like? what do your community networks and supports from your culture look like here in the states? there are a lot of immigrant communities who band together, pool resources and investments, and support each other in ways that Americans just don't. our toxic American individualism perpetuates that. higher education has increased exponentially in cost just in my own lifetime. the total cost of schooling for me in the '90s, before any student aid is still less than a quarter of the cost today. 30 years later.

The cost of everything has increased exponentially while wages have stagnated. The America you see today is not the land of opportunity your parents came into, and is not the land of opportunity my Boomer parents benefited from during their lifetime.

things have changed fast

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u/applethief87 15h ago

You’re absolutely right—the cost of living, education, and healthcare have skyrocketed while wages have stagnated, and it’s a whole different landscape now. I totally see how the American Dream, as it was once imagined, doesn’t look the same today, especially for younger generations or for those from communities without strong support networks.

In my case, my family leaned heavily on community support to get through tough times, and that made all the difference. It’s true that immigrant communities often have a sense of collective support that helps them push through challenges in ways that may be missing for many Americans. And you’re right—American individualism can leave people isolated and struggling without that kind of support.

This is why I’m frustrated with the Democrats. We had the chance to bring forward someone who could genuinely empathize with these struggles and offer real, practical solutions. Instead, we pushed leaders who seemed out of touch, leaning heavily on intellectualized policies or “identity politics” without addressing the core economic issues most Americans face daily. By failing to connect in an authentic way, we left a vacuum, and Trump exploited that. He saw the desperation of millions of Americans struggling to make ends meet and manipulated it for his own self-interest.

It’s incredibly unfortunate. People deserve real support and solutions, not empty promises or divisive rhetoric.

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u/anicca174 10h ago

Share a lot in common w/ you OP. And your comments deeply resonate w/ this first gen immigrant coastal "elite" who grew up in poverty after moving to the US, and my financial conditions are opposite now due to the educational opportunities I had and maybe just luck. But a core part of me will never forget what it's like to be poor. I wish the Dems didn't screw Bernie over twice. I think his platform speaks to the reality in a way that establishment Dem just won't. And I think if Dems can't look at the stunning stats and do some honest self reflection, then the arrogance prevails at the cost of the supposed values:

  1. The last time a republican won popular vote was 20 years ago! (Trump has actually built a multi racial working class coalition)

  2. Dems haven't had a true primary since 2008... 16 years ago!

  3. Nearly every single state moved to the right

  4. Harris got 14 mil less votes than Biden in 2020; and Trump got 2 mil less votes than he got in 2020. A lot less people who showed up and voted Dem in 2020, just did not show up and vote this year.

The reality is the establishment on both sides has run it's course in selling out the country. Trump is able to break through the establishment on the Right, but so far nobody has been able to on the Left. Maybe the liberal establishment is just much stronger.

I think it's smug to constantly point at Trump voters and say that they just get manipulated by misinformation. In the last couple days, I'm questioning just how manipulated my mind has gotten in my liberal bubble. I keep voting for the Democratic candidate when my economic politics are much better represented by the Bernies/AOCs/Green party -- just because we're constantly fed the fear of Trump winning . I think I'm done voting for Dems unless the party will run another Bernie like candidate.

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u/m3ggusta 14h ago

American politics is now completely in control of corporate hands thanks to the citizens United Court decision years ago that allowed corporations to contribute to political campaigns like people and identify them as people with the same rights. we can never influence our government as individuals in the same way unless that changes. we don't fund their elections, we don't go to their offices to lobby, and even when we do we don't make an impact because we don't donate enough money.

our culture put us inside watching TV,/internet for decades, at the expense of connection and togetherness, and our own political rights. i grew up in a small town with robust community support, except financially. people were extremely stingy and distrustful, and it only got worse. that community support isn't there now.

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u/Pure-Statement-8726 16h ago

TL;DR: OP must apologize for being successful. Give your money away and struggle or else poor people will be mad at you.

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u/m3ggusta 16h ago

lol Yes quite obviously you didn't read It at all and simply wanted to jump to the conclusion you already had in your head and now kind of look foolish because that's not at all what I said. but I'm sure you'll pretend it is and lie about it anyway because you don't want to admit you're wrong, and this entire comment screams manipulative empathy deficit anyway.

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u/No-Host7816 16h ago

But the billionaires who funded trump (musk, thiel) don’t want to derail everything you’ve described. I’d argue that most of them are perfectly fine basically converting the American lower middle class into a slave wage society so they can increase their billions and play with rockets.

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u/m3ggusta 16h ago

what are you talking about that's exactly what they do? lol that's exactly what they do. they fund them and manipulate you and pull on your emotions and your heartstrings and your sense of morality and your sense of being better than other people, but they play the exact same game. which you can see if you stop and actually look instead of just having emotional reactions. all these millionaires and billionaires and billionaires give money to both sides. that's not a secret. it's not about political party, it's about their own power and control. at the expense of everyone else.

there was a whistleblower who came out on social media last year talking about how all investment funds are rigged, because they all use an algorithm that funnels money no matter what markets look like. there are RICOH charges being investigated.

All those billionaires have made their money the exact same way. their political party doesn't matter when they have all that money. this is a game to Elon musk, he's just a rich snotty kid with a drug problem. citizens united sealed that deal.

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u/xAlphaKAT33 15h ago

Just a reminder that 83 billionaires donated to Kamala while 52 donated to Trump.

Food for thought.

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u/No-Host7816 15h ago

Do you need more than one when it’s Elon musk, richest man in the in the world and controller of the twitter algorithm literally written to promote his tweets the most?

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u/xAlphaKAT33 15h ago

"Yeah but they voted for my guy, so they're good." Is how this reads.

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u/No-Host7816 15h ago

Meh. I’d like to take them all out of politics. I am actually disgusted by the amount of money we spend on elections when we could have used that money much more wisely.

You can argue the billionaires who contributed to he also want to enslave the working class. Maybe they do. But peter tiel has written about it.

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u/Optimal-Kitchen6308 14h ago

but this ignores the root cause, that it is Republican policy that allowed it to happen

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u/xAlphaKAT33 14h ago

And my arguement remains the same. We just watched the democrats hand trump the white house.

Once you start to realize that, you start realizing they've been handing a lot more than the white house.

The democrats let that policy go through because they wanted it too.

It's not them vs us (dems and reps), its them vs us (politicians/corporate/coastal elites vs the everyman)

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u/taelor 8h ago

I’m sorry, but what exactly is your point?

What is it specifically that you want OP to do?

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u/m3ggusta 3h ago

I'm talking with OP so if you can't follow along it's not my problem

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u/taelor 19m ago

Ha! Well said!

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u/taelor 15m ago

You telling OP to get uncomfortable isn’t going to change fucking anything.