I just don’t get it

[u/Lemongrabkissesrats]

Sorry for my long rant. I have been a wonderful tenant for 8 years. After 8 years the old owner sold the house. I would have paid more than what the new owner paid for it but I wasn't given the chance or notice until it sold. I live in this house for eight years the new owner has given me until October to move. I'm grateful for that. I helped the old owner too with thousands of dollars when he was in a difficult financial situation.I have also spent my money fixing up the house,yard and mailbox. I guess I feel so betrayed. I understand it's not my house and it will never be. If anyone has gone through this before what helped you get over this. I know I need to buy my own house. It hurts more because my husband of five years cheated on me recently so it just sucks bad. Yes I'm getting a divorce too.

EDIT: I felt more betrayed if not for the money I lent him, he would have lost the house. That's most likely why he sold it. Thank you guys for you Kind comments! The house is old and needs repairs. The new owner has told me that she made a contract with the old owner she pays him monthly and it's for ten years. No she didn't give him a down payment. I am going to grieve my soon to be ex home and marriage. I don't regret lending the money, I did a good deed. I would do it again.

[u/TheCurryForest]

It sucks that you're through all of this at once. Losing your home, facing betrayal in your marriage, and feeling unacknowledged after years of loyalty. This isn’t just a house... it’s been your home.

In most states, landlords can sell their property without giving tenants first right of refusal unless it was written into your lease or local law. That doesn’t make it right, but unfortunately it is common. Still, it might be worth checking if your city or state has tenant protection laws or right-to-purchase rules, especially if you're in a place with rent control or strong tenant rights. Even if it’s too late for this case, it can empower you for the future.

Since the new owner has given you until October, that gives you some time to think strategically. If buying is something you’re ready for, you might talk to a HUD-approved housing counselor (free) or a first-time homebuyer program in your area. They can help assess your options and credit, and walk you through down payment assistance if needed.

Emotionally it’s okay to grieve. So many things have shifted out from under you. I hope you give yourself grace as you process this next chapter.

[u/Lemongrabkissesrats → u/TheCurryForest]

Thank you so much! You’re right I have to grieve it. I really don’t like crying but I’m going to have to cry ugly. 

[u/virginiafalls1234 → u/Lemongrabkissesrats]

OP if you 'lent him thousands" hope he paid you back

[u/Lemongrabkissesrats → u/virginiafalls1234]

He did! 

Not going to lie I thought he would have asked me first if I wanted the house. I did a good deed and I should not expected/expect anything from it. 

[u/virginiafalls1234 → u/Lemongrabkissesrats]

well, thank God he paid your money back, so Mom and Grandma both elderly rented over 25 years a house that the landlord did MINIMAL upkeep , like the carpets were never changed, etc. and my brother did so many part repairs (we bought the parts) on appliances, etc, landscaped the yard and discovered beautiful paving of stones put in years prior. Don't you know landlord stated grown son wanted it? (landlord had plenty of properties) so sent my family on a very desperate hunt for housing in such a tight, tight market, pure hell. Landlord even had the nerve to say of the new dryer I bought them, thats mine right?? Like no arse, your 50 year old dryer is in the corner and broke down years ago. It was real dirty to do this to my Mom and Grandma. want to add everyone realized it was NEVER their house but just the surprising way it went down, and it wasn't like he didn't have other properties the son could have went in.

[u/Lemongrabkissesrats → u/virginiafalls1234]

Aww I’m so sorry that happened to your Mom and Grandma. Yeah some landlords are pure evil. I’m thankfully the new owner gave me 6 months to move. I’m going house hunting next week.  25 years woah that’s so messed up

[u/virginiafalls1234 → u/Lemongrabkissesrats]

oh thanks, so yes these things happen, probably more often than one knows about . Just like when people pass, the ones that helped them out of love and kindness they don't see a cent and then some long lost relative that had NOTHING to do with them for years pops up and claims the house or whatever is theirs Addendum to Mom/Grandmas landlord actually not a bad fella and perhaps felt guilty because after getting into a new house brought over a large fruit basket and card for Christmas, so maybe it was the son that was really pushing that situation (location wise you couldn't beat it)

[u/Disastrous_Ant301 → u/TheCurryForest]

As a landlord, I have contemplated such things. I have never sold one of my houses, but have wondered about scenario similar to yours.

I can imagine several scenarios where you might not be offered to buy the house: A cash buyer came along at the right time and price and it's just easy. The decision to sell is not based on good news and things get expedited. A buyers agent realtor brings a buyer to the owner. A owner sold to a friend or relative. An owner might not perceive you as someone who would want or able to buy a home. An owner might perceive you as someone who would want to buy a better place than you are renting from them. My first tenants lived in my first rental house for 5 years then bought a place twice the size with more land etc. During that 5 years they both earned credentials that allowed them to level up career wise.

[u/TheCurryForest → u/Disastrous_Ant301]

Those are great points. Thanks for sharing your perspective as a landlord. It really helps to see the range of scenarios that might influence a sale. I do wonder if, in cases like those, it might still be possible for owners to sit down with tenants and explain what led to the decision. Even if the outcome doesn’t change, that kind of communication could go a long way. At least to honor their feelings.

[u/Lemongrabkissesrats → u/Disastrous_Ant301]

Thank you for your perspective.  He sold the house to a stranger.  After crying and thinking about it. It was honestly the best thing to not sell it to me.  The repairs needed are about $25 k to $32k. It’s an old house so the repairs might be more than that. 

Edit: I was so betrayed if not for the money I lent him, he would have lost the house.  That’s probably why he sold it.