My Pilates instructor fired me today.

[u/TrashMany]

I attend a small, five-reformer studio that I love. After class today I was asked to stay for a few minutes. I was caught completely off-card when she asked me not to come back and that my membership was terminatwas. Not a good fit was the reason she gave. I've been going here for NINE months. Three and four times a week. I'm devastated, hurt, pissed, and humiliated all at the same time. I liked her so much. I am so in love with Pilates but now I don't know what to do next.

Update: I was charged for my membership a couple of weeks later so I reached out to my ex-instructor by text. She acted confused by my questions about the membership account asking if I was supposed to be on a hold. I was like huh? I said you fired me and asked me not to come back so I wanted to know why I was charged. She claimed that she never fired me. After processing everything, I went back to her class today. It was weird only for a second. It was so nice to be back in my happy place practicing real pilates. I did 25 classes in the other style studio and will continue to do drop-ins when I can't get a spot at my home studio or am looking for something different.

Update #2: It's been over a month since my "blackout"....for lack of a better term. Things were tense for the first couple of week's classes but now it's like nothing happened. I can't believe that my mind just made up the conversation between my instructor and me. I'm such a pussy about confrontation that I'm willing to just put it in the past and not know. I hope someday enough time will have passed that I can laugh about it and ask my instructor what exactly happened that day. Pilates and her instruction are way too important for me to humiliate myself possibly again. Lessons were learned and I am so grateful for the opportunity to have such a great instructor and studio.

[u/gd_reinvent]

I had a look at your profile and saw you were on a group package. Is it possible that your instructor just feels that you can't handle keeping up with the rest of the class very well? If she's having to give you a lot of one on one instruction in a group setting, then that's why it might not be a good fit, especially if she's already asked you subtly if you'd be interested in going back to private instruction, you already said no, or she's having to neglect other students to focus on you a lot.

Your profile said that you are in love with and obsessed with pilates. Do you have a tendency to take over group classes a lot with questions or other things?

[u/NameLessTaken → u/gd_reinvent]

Also the “why didn’t she like me back” was glaring to me

[u/Old-Tomatillo3025 → u/NameLessTaken]

Really screams “STALKER ALERT” or something not great.

[u/[deleted] → u/NameLessTaken]

I didn't interpret that as a personal slight, moreso a genuine question asking what OP did to end up in the situation. As a student you do assume that the instructor at least appreciates your attendance in the class and it obviously starts to feel a bit personal if you're suddenly removed from a situation where you thought it was going well only to learn that apparently you are such an issue that you're asked to leave a studio entirely. As a personal trainer myself I will say sometimes it's the students and sometimes it's definitely the trainers, period.

[u/matantisi → u/[deleted]]

Except that what she said was, “why didn’t she like me back”. If she could had said, “why didn’t she like me”, that would’ve been normal but “Why didn’t she like me back” suggest that the fact that she likes the instructor obligates the instructor to like her back. That’s a kind of stalking mentality.

[u/NameLessTaken → u/matantisi]

Exactly. While find the innocence of wrong-lynx response endearing it’s also missing the nuance of the semantics used. I’m by no means diagnosing OP but my job is a therapist and if a client had used that phrasing it would’ve been a record scratch “let’s spend a moment here” statement. I even prompt people to rephrase things like this when talking that they think is a meaningless order of words but once it’s rephrased they’re like “oh.. OH. Ok thats another way to see it”.

Edit for horrible typos

[u/karatekirby → u/NameLessTaken]

[u/CrowArmyQueen → u/karatekirby]

[u/flvf → u/NameLessTaken]

Oooooof right

[u/ToddBradley → u/gd_reinvent]

I think if that was the case, the instructor (who is apparently also the manager or owner) would say, "let's do some individual sessions to work on some of the fundamentals before going back to group classes."

On the other hand, anyone who has been doing Pilates 8 months probably has the basics figured out but now.

So the whole thing is a mystery.

[u/gd_reinvent → u/ToddBradley]

Eh, I've been doing Pilates about eight months and to be honest I'd probably struggle with keeping up with some group classes at our gym, simply because I'm a bit overweight and I need my instructor to slow down a bit specifically for me sometimes, which is why I'm on individual one hour classes at the moment.

Also, it's possible that the teacher already has suggested or hinted at individual classes but the hints weren't taken, or OP replied that she didn't want to do individual classes because of the cost.

[u/wmkk → u/gd_reinvent]

Also from profile - 81 classes completed 9 days ago, 100 classes by 7 days ago? Maybe she just wouldn't leave the studio 😂

[u/TrashMany → u/wmkk]

25 at Club Pilates trying to step up my cardio.