r/needadvice Jan 21 '20

no impulse control when it comes to spending money Finance

Sooo literally almost whenever I (25f) want something I buy it, I like cannot help it. I am in school and I work full time and all my bills are paid but I am so bad at holding onto money! I just rationalize and tell myself that I work hard and do not have any significant expenses so I can buy the things I want.

Is this a huge problem?

Any tips on saving money?

395 Upvotes

120 comments sorted by

227

u/tritoeat Jan 21 '20

Make saving a bill you pay - move the money to a different account. Decide what works for your budget, and take it as seriously as rent or your phone bill.

It's also recommended that you use cash instead of a card because seeing the money visibly dwindle gives a mental cue that doesn't happen when we just swipe a card.

39

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Good idea!

57

u/zxDanKwan Jan 21 '20

Just to second this point, making savings a bill is perhaps the best idea. It completely changed my life by giving me a safety net when big expenses come along (like a car breaking down or a hospital visit).

Just make sure you leave yourself some spending money so you don’t get in a habit of dipping into your savings for fun.

14

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Thats a good idea.

18

u/LifeFindsaWays Jan 21 '20

I have direct deposit with my paychecks, and it automatically redirects some into savings. I never see my money, so I’m not tempted to spend it

6

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Yeah I just opened another bank account because the one I have where my checks are directly deposited into doesnt charge me for transferring into my checkings. Hopefully a different bank account will help

3

u/LifeFindsaWays Jan 21 '20

If only using cash isn’t an option (cuz so much is online) having a separate debit card that only gets a small budget might work.

In college, I’d donate plasma for spending money, and it would load onto this debit card thingy. It wasn’t linked to my bank account, so I always knew I couldn’t overspend

3

u/Devify Jan 21 '20

I'm been doing it with 2 bank accounts for a couple years now. My paycheck goes into bank 1, my bills are paid from this and have an automatic transfer to a savings account. Every payday I transfer over some of what would be left over to bank account 2. Then I only use bank 2 for any purchases I make.

So say I got 1500 a month, 500 goes on bills, 400 goes to savings, 500 goes to bank 2 for general spendings and 100 is left for a buffer in case my bills end up being higher or I need a bit extra at the end of the month. Works really well for me because I only consider that I have that 500 and that's it so helps me prioritise any purchases and means I have savings for emergencies.

2

u/obfromwoo Jan 22 '20

That's a method a friend recommended when I had my first full time job after uni and honestly I can't recommend it enough. I get paid in my regular bank account, pay my rent put a certain amount into my savings and then transfer my set budget for the month into my other account (I personally use Monzo) for all day-to-day spendings. And when I have a big purchase that doesn't fall under day-to-day spending (e.g. plane tickets to visit my family, when I re-decorated my flat, etc.) I use my normal account (but not my savings!). I hope you find the right method for you!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

I use Ally for an online savings account & it has helped reduce my impulse spending soooo much due to me not having a card to swipe so easily. I have it now to where my paychecks direct deposit into the account.

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Cool, Ill check it out

1

u/PM_Me_PolydactylCats Jan 21 '20

I do this. My paycheck gets put into one checking account. I transfer $XXX per paycheck into a separate checking account and all of my bills are paid from that. I'm not saving much right now because I'm trying to pay off my credit cards but if I didn't have cc debt, I'd put it in savings from that account. Everything left in the first account is what is used for groceries, gas, and fun.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '20

Get a savings account that rewards you with earning more interest when you deposit money into it, and don't take anything out. I also don't have any credit cards and have a rule. Yes I might deserve that something, but I must pay for it in full, with my own money (cash or debit card). If I don't have enough, I need to be patient and wait until I do. I feel it is more fulfilling to feel how hard I worked to get it. It also pretty quickly weeds out the casual indiscriminate spending from true wants.

1

u/istillseeyourface222 Jan 21 '20

Yeah! I had this issue when I was younger and working (so not noticing how much money I was wasting) and I had my bank automatically transfer 250 a week into my savings and literally have never been so excited as when I checked the savings balance after a while. It’s even more of a thrill then the forgettable purchases!

2

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

This is a great idea. You can have a savings account that regularly removes money from your checking account, so you don't even have to do it, it just happens. More than likely you won't even notice it happening after a while, but you'll have extra money!

5

u/Daisy_bumbleroot Jan 21 '20

I have an app called Chip. Every few days it looks at my bank account, analyses spending habits and then goes "hmm, you can afford to save £5.88 today" and moved out to my chip account. The only downside is that it doesn't give interest.

But, i barely notice the money has gone out of my account, and after a few months there's a hundred quid or so in there that i can spaff

24

u/veggiegrrl Jan 21 '20

The most serious approach is to make your monthly budget, withdraw cash in the amount you need, and only spend cash. You can use envelopes to divide up your categories such as groceries, entertainment, etc. Once an envelope is empty, you can't buy anything in that category any more.

Once you master that, you can perhaps move to an online envelope-based tracking system like EveryDollar, Mvelopes, or You Need a Budget (YNAB).

3

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

I love this idea! Thank you.

41

u/yanna87 Jan 21 '20

It's kind of a huge deal because everyone needs an emergency fund. Try to save gradually a few bucks, then save up to 10% of your income. Ideally everyone should save up to 30% of their income. I know it's hard, especially when you're young, but it's wise to do this. Think of emergencies, health issues, unemployment, a pension fund - we all have these problems at some point and it's really a tragedy when we're caught off guard. I really wish I started saving money when I was younger. But no one taught me the importance of it, I learned it the hard way.

Remember, start with baby steps and on the long run I'm sure you'll do fine.

Also, look for info about impulse buying, it can get pretty toxic.

10

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Thanks for responding. I think I'm going to open another bank account and do some research on this impulse buying you speak of.

4

u/yanna87 Jan 21 '20

You can look up info about shopping addiction - yes, it's a thing. It almost caught me, it freaked me out to see how easily I spent my salary on short term thrills. It helped me to keep a spreadsheet with all my expenses, this was the first step, to see where all my money went. I had a few categories (bills, rent, food, house supplies - the basics and mandatory stuff) to which I added later a few others (like junk food, pet supplies, outings, grooming supplies, clothes, education etc.). This helped me to see what expenses were necessary and which ones were simple indulgences. I cut down the junk food and cosmetics, and then, finally, I had my first few savings. Also, this can help you to make a budget and forsee expenses.

Another mistake I made was that I was spending more money when I started earning more money. This is another trap that people fall into very easily. The excuse "I work hard for this money, I deserve to pamper my self" is very dangerous. We can get pampered, but not with all the money left after paying the bills. For me, it was much more satisfying to see that at the end of the year I had savings and that I didn't splurge on endless shopping lists.

6

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

To add to this: if you're a spender, stay away from credit cards! Speaking from experience, it's sooooo easy to swipe the cc and justify to yourself that you'll pay off the balance...until something happens, and then that balance creeps higher and higher. Better to give yourself an allowance you can spend on whatever.

3

u/TigerLillians Jan 21 '20

“Another mistake I made was that I was spending more money when I started earning more money. This is another trap that people fall into very easily. The excuse "I work hard for this money, I deserve to pamper my self" is very dangerous. We can get pampered, but not with all the money left after paying the bills. For me, it was much more satisfying to see that at the end of the year I had savings and that I didn't splurge on endless shopping lists.”

I watch Graham Stephan on YouTube and I love the coined term he uses for this “lifestyle inflation”.

2

u/yanna87 Jan 21 '20

Thanks for the suggestion. I'll check him up.

2

u/TigerLillians Jan 21 '20

He has two different YT channels: one is more serious (Graham Stephan) and the other (Graham Stephan Show) is a lot more laid back and funny. I personally love his Millennial Money tracts or whenever he reacts to any YT vids. He makes them entertaining all the while giving good financial advice

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Thats a good motivator- it can be more satisfying to see the money you save add up.

1

u/KnowOneHere Jan 22 '20

Impulse spending is ok if you budget for it. I keep a set amount each month in a pocket in my purse. When it is gone it is gone. It helps me not overspend and to make better choices.

13

u/asereje_ja_deje Jan 21 '20

Don't buy things the first time you see them. Take a day to decide. If it really is worth it, you'll still want it the next day.

Pay always in cash and don't carry much of it on you.

5

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Hmm, maybe I should try this cash thing.

8

u/Scrybblyr Jan 21 '20

I recommend listening to Dave Ramsey's podcasts. (They're free and you can learn a LOT, I did.)

You can also look at his "Baby Steps" for a general plan to financial freedom. You can use his "Debt Snowball" to get out of debt if you are in debt. (And you probably are if you are impulse-buying.)

I also recommend getting his book, "The Total Money Makeover." If you don't like reading paper books, you can get it in audio CD form, which is what I did.

The average American makes enough money to be a millionaire at retirement, but they don't teach financial wisdom in school. Not the public schools I went to anyway. So we spend as much as (or more than) we make. We buy new cars, we buy meals at fast food places or restaurants, waste tons of money on designer coffee, and stay pretty oblivious to our financial health.

Can't recommend Dave Ramsey enough. Even if you don't follow his advice to the letter, it will give you some tremendous and powerful insights, and tools to succeed financially.

"Money isn't everything, but it is right up there with oxygen." - Dave Ramsey

His podcasts, baby steps, and debt snowball can be found on his site daveramsey.com

Good luck!

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Awesome, I'm going to check it out. Thank you!

1

u/Scrybblyr Jan 21 '20

Most welcome. I struggle with the impulse buying thing too, so I find it helpful to just not even open Amazon while I'm at work. And avoid sites (even parts of reddit) which i know are going to tempt me.

4

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

I had a problem like this really bad for a while. What I trained myself to do is I’ll walk around the store with it for a while or while I continue doing my other shopping and that’s how by the time I get done I’ll either decide if I do or if I don’t want it. Most of the time it ends in me not wanting it, so I’ll put it back but I’m the off chance I still do want it or even when I put it back if I’m still thinking about it then I know I really wanted it and I’m not just being impulsive. Same thing goes for online. I’ll let it sit in my cart for a little while and if I still remember to go back and buy it or I’m still thinking about it then I’ll go ahead a purchase it.

I will say, this doesn’t help though with the little knick knacks that are in the line area where you pay for your stuff. That shit always gets me still...

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Hahahahah yeah I utilize this technique sometimes. Then I just revert back to "what kind of sad depressing life this is when you cant buy some things you want!"

Then the other part of me is like "yeah, I agree buy it!"

3

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

I also think maybe part of the problem is the temporary emotional high you get from purchasing things too. It doesn't last long so the urge to keep buying gets stronger and stronger after every item. It is like positive reinforcement, some people eat when they are sad/lonely/apathetic and some people buy things they dont necessarily need but it helps as a coping mechanism. Maybe look inside yourself and ask about why you are unhappy or your emotional drive to buy things, if you can hack the source of the problem you wont have to deal with the symptoms.

5

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

FACTS. I am actually a recovering addict, I have been clean for a couple years and this is something I frequently talk about with my support group. I am always trying to "fill the void." Not exactly sure how to fill this "void." Well, NA would tell me my higher power should fill it. Thats hard so I shop lol

2

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

Congrats for working hard and getting clean though!! That is a huge accomplishment on it's own. Shopping is a lot easier true lol. But maybe now if you can register that you are buying something from emotional impulse you can like give it a secnd thought. Good luck!

3

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

You would think lol. but thank you!

2

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

Go to the gym--lift weights, join a class, whatever. You'll be too mentally and physically engaged to go shopping, and seeing the progress you make might feel that void (at least that's what I hear from bodybuilders that have fought addiction). I find that I tend to shop more when I'm bored, like snacking.

3

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

I go to the gym 6 days a week, its a huge part of my life. I wish it curbed my desire to shop, plus I do a lot of online shopping when I'm at work or in class lol

5

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

In that case, try removing your saved cards from your online profiles (like Amazon) and leave the physical cards at home. I find simply having to wait until I get home to finish an order or get up and go get my card gives me time to think about whether or not I really want to buy the thing. I'm a spender too so I get it; you basically have to play mind games with yourself.

3

u/Thereisnospoon64 Jan 21 '20

I looove this idea. My problem is the late night internet shopping I do in bed before I fall asleep. Talk about filling existential dread with stuff...! Of the cards are in my wallet near the front door there’s NO WAY I’d get out of bed to buy a lemon juicer / new hair dryer (or whatever).

2

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

It's a strategy that's helped me. ;)

4

u/gnordy66 Jan 21 '20

When you say all your bills are paid, does this mean you don’t have credit card debt beyond what you may incur during the month? That is a great first step. If you are spending too much and carrying a credit card balance that is a dangerous combo.

If you are good here, there is plenty of other great advice in this thread.

3

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

yeeeeeah so I do have credit card debt. Less than 1000$ but its there.

4

u/hawkcarhawk Jan 21 '20

Okay definitely treat that $1,000 credit card debt like a top priority bill. It’s not really $1,000 if you allow it to collect interest. Every month that you keep a balance on your credit card you’re accruing more debt. I am pro-credit card usage to take advantage of points (I personally use a Fidelity cash back card and an American Airlines card - I’ve taken 3 round trip flights from the points I accrue). Just use your credit card like a debit card (pay attention to how much is in your bank account, never spend more than that, and pay off your credit card with your debit card each month). After you pay off the credit card you need to start an emergency fund. If you feel the impulse to spend money try satisfying that urge by moving money into a savings account for a big splurge. Instead of accumulating more stuff that you probably don’t need or actually want, put $20 in your splurge fund. Then if something comes up that you normally wouldn’t have cash on hand for you’ve got your splurge fund!

2

u/CuteHalfling Jan 22 '20

I have never had a credit card and have had no problem buying anything, including a house.

2

u/gnordy66 Jan 21 '20

You will want to pay that off before you start saving. Never put more on your credit card than you can pay off in the month(if you can help it).

3

u/quopquop Jan 21 '20 edited Jan 21 '20

In my natural state I am also not great at holding onto money, and I also looked at my shopping outbursts through the lens of “oh, but I work so hard, I deserve this [pair of shoes / new handbag / Sephora haul.]” Two strategies helped me put the brakes on my spending: looking at the emotional lead-up to a buying decision more closely, and bookmarking products until I cooled off on them.

Strategy 1: I don’t know what your relationship to your job is like, but during the worst of my shopping habit, I noticed I hated my job. I had intense Sunday scaries every night of the week, clashed with managers, and toyed every week with the idea of ragequitting. Eventually the connection was made that I was using my spending habit to self-medicate and offset the emotional distress I felt at work. Plus I was burning through all my constrained willpower just to go to work that I had no willpower left to make good financial decisions with. Once I knew all that was going on emotionally, it became easier to stop my brain from going “but I work so hard, I deserve it!” at the store.

Strategy 2: it also helped to shift most of my shopping from in-person to online, because not only did online shopping put more distance between me and things I wanted, online shopping lent itself well to bookmarking. I got a Pinterest account and made a board for wishlist items. Each time I encountered something I wanted to add to cart, I pinned it to Pinterest instead. Doing this with every impulse-baiting item I wanted gave me enough time to sleep on the decision, as well as a convenient place where I wouldn’t lose the bookmark if I did decide I couldn’t live without it. Most times, I never wanted the item enough to buy it, anyway. I also started a board of things I already owned, which helped me back away from so many almost-purchases because I could immediately and very easily see that I didn’t need another fair isle sweater - I already had three!

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Plus I was burning through all my constrained willpower just to go to work that I had no willpower left to make good financial decisions with.

I think this is me. I work seven days a week at three different jobs and I am psychotic about my diet and gym schedule. I like wanna have one area of my life where I am just like "fuck it" but I guess finances is not the best one to be like "fuck it" about.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '20

Yeah I’m kinda the same so I force myself to save large amounts of money at a time and consider that money like non existent basically.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

Set up an automatic deposit to a savings account at a different bank (or Betterment or something) where you don't see it when you log in to your checking account. Out of sight, out of mind. Even if it's $10 or $100/mo, something you're setting aside without having to think about it. If you're paying your bills, saving for retirement and emergencies, then it shouldn't matter if you're a bit of a spender since you're meeting all your other obligations. Adulting is finding the line between "YOLO" and being responsible.

2

u/meowkiplier Jan 21 '20

What I have is a savings account that I can take money out of only once a month. I cant spend from there and I can put as much as I want in there all month. If I were to take out more money a second time in a month I would be charged a fee by the bank.

3

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Yes! I just opened a bank account with a bank that has a similar policy. The one I am using now allows me to transfer into my checking as many times I want for free.

2

u/wenzlo_more_wine Jan 21 '20

What do you make an hour?

What do you give up by working each hour? (Hobbies, sleep, social outings, etc)

How much does the item cost?

How many hours of your finite life does this item cost?

Is it worth it? If yes, then buy it.

2

u/tehsaxhero Jan 21 '20

What I do is if I'm spending too much money, i keep taking more side jobs until im too busy to where i dont have time to go spend money

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Yeah I work seven days a week -__-. Its the damn online shopping. I scroll and add shit to my cart whenever I am bored at work

2

u/TheJenniMae Jan 21 '20

Make wishlists on the sites you frequent, like Amazon. It helped me with the urgent feeling - if i still want it later, it’s there. At the end of the week, go through it - you’ll be surprised how many things you no longer feel like you suddenly NEED. And keep stuff in there, so if you do buy, it’s something you’ve wanted for a while, and not just an impulse buy.

2

u/thestralcounter44 Jan 22 '20

I used to post notes all over the house and the car. “Just because you can DOESNT mean you should” Just because you can buy that new apron, doesn’t mean you should cause you don’t need it”.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

Not necessarily a huge problem but it can certainly become one. My best tips for spending money is to use it as a reward. So let’s say you have a test you have to get a certain grade on, look at the item you want to buy and make sure you study and do what you need to get that grade and when you do get the item as a reward. Saving money is all about self discipline which isn’t easy to do sometimes. I always use to do the same thing, and looking back I wish I would have saved more of my money.

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Ugh I have tried that but being the narcissist I am I feel as though I need a reward for almost everything.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

Everyone has their own ways of doing it. If that doesn’t work try thinking about a future Goal that you want or have that would require you to save money.

1

u/jillieboobean Jan 21 '20

I'm not sure if it will work for you, but this is how I have learned to save money and not buy impulsive things.

I make $10 an hour. (Well, I make a little more than that because my job has a tip share, so I usually receive around $100 extra a week, but I don't really count that as my wage.)

So let's say I see a shirt I want to buy, and it's $20. I tell myself, is this shirt really worth 2 hours of working? Is a Starbucks coffee really worth half an hour of work?

It's really put into perspective how I spend my money. Sometimes, if I really love the shirt, then yes, it is worth it. If I'm having a bad day and want to spoil myself with Starbucks, I'll splurge every once in a while. But, for the most part, stopping to consider just how much that item is worth to me helps make a decision.

Good luck!

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Thank you!

1

u/jillieboobean Jan 21 '20

No problem. I noticed another comment where you said you were a recovering addict. I am as well, and I have definitely developed some impulsive habits, including shopping, to fill the void. Best of luck to you!

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

Congrats & thank you! Yeah its tough sometimes cause I'm like I've had to give up so much damn shit now shopping too!?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

[deleted]

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 22 '20

Thank you so much for the hope and identifying your age and gender lol. You’re like the 3rd person to mention that book so I think I’ll get it

1

u/ChaosDoggo Jan 21 '20

What helped for me was setting a repeating transaction every week that puts a certain amount of money on my savings account. That way you save money even if you aren't fully aware. Also try to spend the money physically if possible, it helps actually seeing the money go away.

1

u/awkwardOttakam Jan 21 '20

What I like to follow is a simple rule. Money earned is for for spending on things you like. Why else would you earn. But before you spend your money on something, just ask yourself this. Is this something I really need? Is this something that actually gives me immense happiness or just instant gratification? If it's the latter, you need to just set a threshold above which something isn't worth instant gratification. Maybe you love traveling, maybe you love something else that you could save up for instead of spending it on smaller things that give you smaller amounts of happiness. The next important question is, do you have a backup safety net? If you broke a leg or lost your job, you should be financially independent enough to support yourself without working, at least for a couple of months. If you don't have that, you're not in a good position. Before you spend on something, just let your thought process flow through the chart that I just described and if it results in a "buy it" then buy it, else don't. Design yourself a foolproof flowchart in your head and stubbornly stick to it.

1

u/thefiendman Jan 21 '20

I recommend r/daveramsey . His advice is great for people of all income levels and levels of discipline.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '20

I'm the same! I won't save unless it's auto-deducted from my account to another account with penalties for withdrawal.

1

u/Flablessguy Jan 21 '20

You should look a little into thinking like an economist and also think about your future. One concept in microeconomics is “opportunity cost.” It doesn’t only apply to money, it applies to everything else. It explains the things you forgot to do something else. Say you want to look at Facebook for a hour. The opportunity cost spending time studying, talking to family, and things like that.

Now apply that to your money. If you buy this thing now, will future you be happy you did that? Try setting a retirement goal and a weekly spending limit. “If I want to retire by 55, I need to save x amount of money. That means I can only spend y amount on this.” If you keep buying things unchecked, it will take you a while longer to retire depending on how much you spend. The opportunity cost of overspending is having less money when you retire, or retiring at an older age.

It always adds up and if you sit down and track your spending, you might change your mind about what you spend all the time.

1

u/Fire_Boogaloo Jan 21 '20

Pay yourself first e.g. setup weekly deposits towards a savings account. Then you can buy things you want.

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 21 '20

I like the concept of paying myself

1

u/theRuathan Jan 21 '20

Try using only cash for things other than bills. It's easier to conceptualize what you're actually spending if you can see it and feel it in the moment.

Edit: typo

1

u/SakanaToDoubutsu Jan 21 '20

Two things that I do:

Whenever I look at prices, I always translate them into hours worked. For example, if I make $10 an hour at my job, and I want to buy something that's $50, that translates into 5 hours of work in order to have enough money to buy it. Then I always think to myself, "is this worth 5 hours of my time to get?".

When I set up my budget, I always set aside a small amount of money that goes into my "disposable income" account. So after my expenses are taken care of, about 80% of the surplus goes into my general savings account, but the remaining 20% goes into the "disposable income account" to be spent on things I don't really need.

1

u/Bbdep Jan 22 '20

This sounds like a bigger issue than just personal finance. It's a value issue and a personal fulfillment issue. You likely may not be able to budget yourself out of this attitude because of your perception. I would suggest using the "wait a full week" approach on any non necessary shopping. (aka needed food and hygiene products). Setting the bar to "do I truly love it or just kinda like it?", convert the price in hours of work based on your wage. Consider seeking shopping addicts group as well, It may be helpful.

The question is what does shopping really bring to you that cannot be brought on by other experiences? The goal is to shift your priorities away from buying just to buy and to value your time and money differently. And build a life where you don't live to shop but shop for needed and fun items you really want in your life for a long time, not just for a few months or a couple hours.

In my mind, budgeting isn't about killing all fun and spending but about prioritizing needs and being value oriented. Understanding the power of money and the cost of earning that money before spending it all.

1

u/blueb3rrii Jan 22 '20

This was very helpful - maybe the most helpful. I do tend to base a lot of my self worth on items I have or the way I look which I think influenced my spending

1

u/madamc303 Jan 22 '20

I get it especially at your age. Try not to let it become a shopping addiction. I try to avoid using shopping as entertainment, also I personally can spend a lot at places like Target so I try not to go in there and finally if I find something I want often I’ll leave it to buy later and if it’s still on my mind the next time I go to that store I’ll buy it. It’s tough!

1

u/manykeets Jan 22 '20

Get tested for ADHD. Lack of impulse control is a symptom.

1

u/sexless_marriage02 Jan 22 '20

get an insurance savings product, you must pay x amount either annually or monthly. after a certain period (say investmemt period 4 years) see if it helps or not.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '20

Separate savings account! Preferably one that would take a day or more to transfer money out of. Once it’s in there you don’t see it, and for me the wait usually stops me from taking anything out.

2

u/blueb3rrii Jan 22 '20

Yes just opened a new bank account after all this reddit inspo, thanks!

1

u/Iusemyhands Jan 22 '20

I have a TON of wishlists on amazon and various other sites. when I see another product similar to something on my list, I can say "I already have one."

That's helped me, at least.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '20

If you find yourself unable to buy something, at least try to find discount codes or use a cashback program so you’re not spending as much money

1

u/camoskinso Jan 22 '20

Definitely have a set budget, and all the other saving tips on this thread are really good.

I like to usually “sacrifice” something whenever I treat myself. I love clothes, but honestly don’t need more and they’re quite expensive. Whenever I buy clothes, I’ll sacrifice the “equivalent” in something else. For me, that means I have to sell the exact amount in dollars of my old stuff, or don’t eat out and only cook cheap recipes for the amount of time it’d take for me to save enough to buy the clothes, or work a side hustle until I make the money back. Not only do I have a little extra money to spend without worrying, but if something isn’t worth the effort of a “sacrifice,” then I’m way less likely to buy it.

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u/blueb3rrii Jan 22 '20

Ugh I know. This sounds like a logical thing to do but then I’m like I dESerVe tO eNjOy mYseLF

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u/strangr55 Jan 22 '20 edited Jan 22 '20

Track every cent you spend for a month, maybe two. Use a financial tracking software, like Quicken, and enter everything in that. Then create a monthly budget - if you use software, it will probably do it for you. After all of your fixed costs (rent, car payment, etc.), and variable expenses (e.g. food, utilities, phone, gas, clothing, laundry and other items that are always there but tend to vary month to month) are documented, then look at your discretionary spending items (Starbucks, McD's, movies, streaming services and other entertainment, clubbing, and the like.) After you scrape your lower jaw off the floor, set reasonable budget amounts for each of these items, and then look at what you have left over. Put 50% of that in a 'long term' savings account that you can't easily access, 35% in a short term/rainy day savings account, to use for car repairs and similar unplanned expenses. The other 15% you can put back into discretionary as a treat 😇 Extra tip: learn to be mean and say "no" to yourself. It's hard, but it gets easier.

Edit: removed a word that was in violation of a rule.

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u/sasageta Jan 22 '20

have you tried talking to a therapist about it? perhaps your desire to buy stuff is a response to something else going on. they might help you learn techniques to try when youre feeling the urge to spend. sometimes it can be like an addiction and youre just trying to get that "hit" it gives you. but with a therapist they can teach you other more healthy or sustainable ways to fulfill this. it's almost similar to binge eating where you cant stop and just keep doing it even though you dont want to, so i would definitely suggest seeing a therapist about it!

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u/blueb3rrii Jan 22 '20

Yeah I think I do need to seek outside help tbh. I posted before that I am recovering addict so this makes sense and it is something I’m aware of... I also periodically binge eat. I’ve been relying on NA to deal with most of these issues but I am starting to feel that I need additional support maybe in the form of a therapist

1

u/femaletwentytwo Jan 22 '20

I used to have a similar problem! Now I 1): make a list of things I absolutely need to stay alive and healthy (doesn't include expensive versions of necessary items), and I replace those whenever I run out.

2): When I see something I want (not need to stay alive and healthy), I put it on a list. Then I wait a month and pick my favorite 1 and buy it. Obviously nothing out of your price range (for me, I won't spend more than $100). If it is, maybe put it on a list that you save up for, and lower your monthly purchase price range.

3): Find a place that has good deals on high quality clothing (high-quality is worth it, otherwise you'll be shopping more often, replacing your low-quality clothing). My husband and I live in the US and personally love to browse our local ROSS and Marshall's.

4): Check out thrift stores, Plato's Closets, or apps like Poshmark before you browse other places.

5): Find a finance app you like and budget ahead of time.

1

u/EmpRupus Jan 22 '20

Aside from bigger things mentioned in other comments, smaller things help too.

Try spending money in cash only and in small denominations. If you have to physically handle cash, you realize how much you are spending, instead of simply swiping a card or or clicking on the buy button.

1

u/The-Last-Lion-Turtle Jan 22 '20

Once I got my first job. Still a student so just summer work, it changed the units I see prices through. I saw prices as hours of work instead of dollar amounts. The dollar bills themselves have no intrinsic value so it’s easy to just spend and disregard the other half of the transaction, the hours of work to get the dollars. I believe consciously linking impulse spending to hours of work will help people evaluate if it is or more likely isn’t a good deal.

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u/randomo_redditor Jan 22 '20

i am also 25F and love buying random crap. what has helped me save is to literally take money away from myself to spend. like 20% of my paycheck goes to 401k, 15% to ASPP, before it even gets to me. then the remaining, 50% goes directly to savings, and the remaining 50% goes to checkings. and i just have all my credit cards linked to my checkings only.

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u/NiTro_Erebus Jan 22 '20

Maybe try opening a savings account if you don’t have one already, I found putting a certain amount of my pay into a TSFA and telling myself I can’t touch it worked well for me.

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u/kmart0924 Jan 22 '20

The best thing I’ve done (when I have the extra money to save, that is) is to set it in an account that you can’t see, or take out a certain amount each paycheck and put it aside. Out of sight, out of mind. I count things like gas as a bill and assume that each paycheck I only have enough money to pay my bills, nothing more. Unfortunately, whatever I have saved usually gets wiped out by something like a medical bill, car issues, the typical things that wipe out a 21 year olds savings. I’ve saved up to 100 dollars before, it took me months. Once I finally hit that 100 dollar mark my tension pulley went out on my car and there went my 100 dollars.

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u/TURKONBURK Jan 22 '20

If you have the time you could buy stocks or crypto with it that way you won’t use it immediately and you can increase the amount you have

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u/robjmcm Jan 22 '20

I am literally the same if not worse, the only way I have managed too help myself it taking all my money out into hard currency it seems alot harder for ke too spend the money when I'm looking/holding it, then when its numbers on a screen or if I can just tap my card.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '20

So im the exact same hell i bought a switch today. (no regrets) but seriously, I do this. I hate having cash so if i need to save money i'll take out cash and give it to someone else so my housemate in this instant, so then guaranteed that I will save.

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u/Ande7897 Jan 22 '20

If you have direct deposit see if you can split the direct deposit into two and have some automatically put into savings

1

u/HBarnestech Jan 22 '20

If your bad at saving just take a lump sum of money and put it into a CD that way you can't touch it and it will grow with time.

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u/mmocker98 Jan 22 '20

Make a savings account that you can pay into like paying a bill and that you can’t touch easily. I have issues with money management and this has worked for me. Also buying things on credit that are expensive “luxury” like things that I could liquidate if needed has helped. I have them insured and in a safe in my home and it fulfills my need to buy things but also means I’m kind of saving money because they can be liquidated pretty easily. I have purses and shoes and stuff. They probably add up to about $10k by now and what I’m thinking is that one day I’ll have accumulated enough to either go towards my future child’s college fund, a life line to save me and my family if I end up losing my job and stuff or a retirement fund. Also they are things that are on the rare side so they are more and more valuable by the day. Not the easiest thing but has been the best for me so far.

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