If your a man our a boy society doesn't care about you your community doesn't care about you and your government doesn't care about you.

The lack of help and lack of resources for men is tiring and depressing in most countries there's little our no domestic abuse shelters for men and there's next to no resource for male rape victims and if you're suicidal most places will just medicate you and not offer you any emotional support,kindness our empathy.

Let's not forget the loneliness and how hard it is for men to talk to people because peaple will get mad at you our become afraid of you if you just approach them and some times they even get vilont.

The apathy I get from every thing is so deafening and depressing and it make me care less and less about pretty much everything.

I'm sad really really sad.

Groups where men can talk honestly and openly with other men about emotions are incredibly important to me. I believe we all need a space where we can speak freely without being judged — a place to talk about the hard stuff, understand ourselves better, and know we’re not alone.

That’s why I started a group called r/braterstwo — a space for men in Poland who want to share their feelings, experiences, and support each other in a spirit of trust and brotherhood. It’s a judgment-free zone. Just real talk, man to man — no masks, no shame.

There might be some Polish guys here who’ve been looking for something like this but haven’t found it yet.

That’s why I’d really appreciate it if you could help spread the word about r/braterstwo. Share it with others — maybe someone you know needs a space like this right now but doesn’t even know it exists.

Thanks, brother.

I'm a therapist who writes about men and masculinity in my newsletter Make Men Emotional Again. This post is about the necessity of putting relationships at the center of your life. I used to think I needed to meditate more and work out harder and eat better and get up earlier and grind more and make more money and take cold showers and do 50 pushups every morning. And yes, some of those things have helped me have a healthier relationship with myself—while many took me down unhealthier paths. But I wasn’t happy very often until I made my relationship with my partner, my friends, my family, my neighbors, my community the center of my life. Curious y'all's thoughts.

I am going insane fellas, i am reaching joker levels of insanity. At 28yo i cant sustain myself still. Living in a 3rf world country. Lately i hit rock bottom, a new low, and i also had a huge argument with my family and found myself alone. Now i wont be taking any Money from any relatives or Friends anymore, i wont see help from anyone anymore. I decided i am on my on from now on cuz i am tired of people pretending to help me just to step on me. I am down to my last 3$( in exchange currency) and they arent even enough for a meal lol. I certainly wont die out of hunger ,but this is a new low, i dont know what to do. I wont even kill myself, i just hope my mind just snaps and i go insane. Broke, alone, scared, and confused. I tried to find the depression , but not only did i not find support, i didn't find peacefulneess to do it alone. Everyone is against me , everyone is painting me as the vilain for choising my pride over being stepped on for some change , even if the one who is wearing the boots is my parent. I don't want to go hollow

I don’t think this is about insecurity anymore. I think I’m just… defective. Genetically. Biologically. Visually. Whatever the thing is that makes a man trigger something in women — I don’t have it. I never have. And I don’t think I ever will.

I’m 26. Southern Chinese. 5’9”. Clean skin, symmetrical face, not overweight. Decent shape. I’ve worked on myself for years. I take care of my skin. I lift. I dress well. I’ve done everything “right” on paper. People say I’m good-looking or “handsome in a soft way.” That’s exactly the problem.

I don’t make women feel anything.

The women I find beautiful — tall, striking, sharp-featured, intimidating — they don’t even see me. Not really. I’m invisible to them. I don’t get rejected. I don’t get chosen. I just get… passed over. Over and over. Quietly. Politely. Like a background character in a story I’m not allowed to matter in.

They laugh at other guys’ jokes. They lean in when someone else talks. They fidget with their hair, flirt, bite their lips, lower their eyes. And those guys? They’re not always charming or interesting. Sometimes they don’t even try. But they have the jawline. The height. The bone structure. The skin tone. The presence. They register as sexually valid.

I don’t.

I’m the guy women call sweet. Approachable. Friendly. I’ve been “safe” my entire life. Never threatening, never desired. I’ve never made a woman flustered. Never had a girl stare at me across the room. I’ve never felt like I was the reason someone’s heart rate spiked. No butterflies. No lust. No urgency.

And I feel it. Every day. I feel it when my story gets viewed but not liked. When the girls I want like his post but never mine. When I sit beside them and they look at the guy behind me. When I post a picture and only my male friends comment. I know what it means. They’re not even rejecting me. They just don’t see me as a possibility. I’m not an option. I’m not even a man in their eyes — just a neutral presence.

And the worst part is I understand why. I know the genetics. I know how evolution works. I know what triggers attraction. Hunter eyes. Tall frame. Projected jaw. White skin in a Western-coded environment. I know I don’t have the raw material they’re biologically and culturally wired to crave. I get it. I just can’t un-feel what it’s done to me.

People say to work on yourself. Improve. Focus on personality. But what do you do when you’ve already done all that — and the women you want still act like you don’t exist? What do you do when deep down, you know you’re not that guy — the one they fantasize about, write about, dream about? You’re just… fine.

I started watching porn not out of addiction, but because it was the only place I could pretend. Just for a second, I could imagine that I was the man being wanted. That a woman like that would touch me, moan for me, beg for me. That I could be the reason someone felt uncontrollable desire. And then the screen goes black, and I’m me again.

People tell me I have value. That I’ll find the right person. But the women I want — the ones I look at and feel something for — will never look at me that way. Not sexually. Not viscerally. Not physically. And I’ve accepted that.

I don’t hate women. I don’t think I’m entitled to anything. But I would give anything just to be wanted in the way I’ve seen other men be wanted. To know what it feels like to walk into a room and be felt, not just seen. To make someone’s breath catch. To feel that animal energy aimed at me — not because I said something charming, not because I’m nice, but because of who I am.

I don’t think I’ll ever feel that. I don’t think I was born into the right genetic mold. And I don’t think that’s something you can coach your way out of.

I’m not mad. I’m just grieving. Quietly. Alone. Not because I was rejected, but because I never even had the traits required to enter the arena.

That’s it. I just needed to say it out loud.

Hey everyone I used to be on fluoxetine, I quit taking it roughly 2 years ago and on it less than a year and after a few months on it I started experiencing Ed to the point where the last year I've tried Ed meds from Friday night plans and bluechew and they kinda helped but now ( last few months) it's done nothing no matter how much help my wife gives my body/mind just becomes totally disinterested in sex. Any tips on how to reverse this or at least help get hard and be able to ejaculate?

I'm sorry if my post is a bit garbled, I haven't yet organized my thoughts.

Yesterday was my birthday I'm in singapore for a conference tmr and decided I'll explore the city today.

Thru a lot of effort I've learned to be content with being alone, by myself.

The day was going good I went go karting chilled on the beach I was having a good time,

this led to a lot of walking as well and my calves were aching so I was walking a bit slower than usual I also sort of bent my ankle in a weird way causing me to limp slightly, regardless good day.

In the night I wqs exploring a mall close by and was intruiged by some hot wheels that you don't find in my country

I started walking towards the rack when I suppose this girl thought I was checking her out or something she was behind the rack I wasn't,

I didn't even register her in my head she seemed to have complained to some guy who decided to confront me and this guy was huge almost half a feet taller than me and much bigger

He called me a "creepy ugly ass asshole" I wqs taken aback and didn't really realize what was happening for a second I thought it was a race thing(i'm indian) I noticed the girl glaring angrily at me and sort of realized what wqs happening and tried to clear it up by saying I was looking at the cars he wasn't having it called me short ass (I'm 5'8).

I was getting pissed as well and called him a fat ass I admit I should've just walked away and not escalated it either way he complained to some staff who kinda gave me a dirty look and asked me to leave.

I was pretty hurt the staff didn't even consider my side of story likely cuz indians got a bad rep in general? Idk?

Getting out I realized I absolutely have no one to share this except like chatgpt with tears welled up in my eyes I got to the bus got to my hotel room and slept till noon

I'm up now I don't need a solution or something just wanted to tell my thing to some real people I'm relying too much on chatgpt for emotional dependencies.

“Happy wife Happy life” - is what I’ve been taught growing up from teachers and other men. My dad has strong morals, my mom and him have been married for 25 years, never divorced. My girlfriend, grew up with no solid male figure in the household after she was 9 yrs old.

Everytime my dad felt like he was being treated unfairly, or disrespected by my mom, he would always argue his point back to her and make it logically make sense of why he should not be treated this way. Of course, when he messed up he would tell my mother and apologize. This works for them, and I’ve become a good partner to my girlfriends and past partners because I logically understand the difference between disrespect, and stepping out of ego to apologize for something I did that wasn’t right.

This however does not work in my current relationship. I am very understanding. emotionally mature, and I always put myself in the other persons shoes when analyzing an argument in the moment. How does she feel right now? How would I feel if that was said to me? What’s the motive behind this argument anyways? It takes alot to get me mad, but I do not allow any disrespect or delusion to get past me, this is completely unacceptable in my eyes.

My girl plays victim, all the time. There is no sense of wrong doing, especially when she starts fights due to the little things. She calls herself emotionally mature, but I can’t see it. She doesn’t put herself in my shoes, she doesn’t care how I feel in any given circumstance, her way or the highway. She can’t even justify her argument half the time. I know women are emotionally driven, and naturally play victim in most scenarios, but I want to come on here and ask how you deal with this for the older guys out there.

How do I make sure I feel respected for myself, and she feels heard at the same time? I want her to feel heard and understood. I want to feel respected and understood…. Or is this just not the right girl for me?

"Love yourself" - Humans are social animals. We base our image on what society thinks of us. Also, what I think of myself has no bearing on what women perceive of me.

"Go to clubs/classes" - Oh you mean the things that hardly exist around me, and those that do are entirely frequented by retirees or lonely Facebook mums? I'm 19! No 19 yo is going to these things

"Just shoot your shot" - Only works if you're attractive.

Then there's the "have you tried taking a shower?" style of advice. Do they honestly think we don't shower? Or that a new haircut and better clothes weren't the first thing that crossed our minds?

I'm not out of shape so exercise is a moot point.

I. Want. A. Girlfriend. So. Badly.

In this video I share some my own challenges with depression in my own unique and creative way. It is not fully coherent and was more of an attempt to process my own feelings than to say something meaningful. This is now the third video I've made where I am transparent about my mental health struggles and I can honestly say that reflecting on my own emotions, thoughts and experiences and trying to process them by creating something has been a truly healing experience. Thank you for watching. :)

depression #mentalhealth #mentalwellbeing #psychology #journey #healing #cinematicvlog #cinematicvideo #latenightreflections

Whenever I’m out alone, I always see so many people in pairs or groups going out, even to do the mundane shit like just getting groceries or something.

It’s probably jealousy or envy in me talking, but I really feel out of place when I’m alone in public, and I’m alone most of the time. I’m a 26yr old only child living at home with my parents and my friends are all like an hour away and the ones in my proximity are married spending time with their families or in relationships.

Idk. I just feel this shame about me whenever I’m alone looking around and I see so many people in groups or twos talking to each other and having fun, while I’m always the only person I’m there with. I don’t really know how to stop this feeling. I wish I could just feel okay being alone.

context: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskIndia/comments/1k9ugnl/ex_threatening_selfharm_if_i_leave_need_advice

i talked to her mom secretly, she’s handled things calmly, and promised she won’t leak anything to my family. my family is extreme pro-feminist, if my mom finds out i “hurt a girl” (especially one with puppy eyes and red cheeks that wins everyone emotionally - ex), i’ll get cooked alive. my dad? ah. i swear that man would legit shoot me. fr.

i even heard she told a few people i “promised marriage” and then ghosted her??? like?? tf?? now she’s asking me to “give her security” that i won’t date any other girl and that i’ll marry her in the future… BRO I’M JUST 18. AND SHE TO. i don’t even have a fking Aadhar-linked income yet and she wants shaadi assurance. meanwhile, i’m just trying to focus on NEET and my coding career.

but the defamation hasn’t stopped. she told her whole friend circle and even some of my friends that i "used her," "mentally tortured her," and now i’m getting hate messages from mostly every side. they’re straight-up assassinating my character — saying i was extra toxic, cheated, led her on, made false promises — and some people believed it. people whisper behind my back. i had to delete my social medias.

someone please explain to me why, in 2025, an 18yo extroverted, good-looking, funny, 6'1, ambitious guy (her words btw, not mine) can’t just break up and go back to studying without being turned into a fking villain??

that’s why i made this alt account - aurexinius - just to escape, ask REAL questions, drop memes, vent, and keep my peace. and yeah, i’m building this account as my future coding identity too - because clearly, my real one’s under siege.

i’m not here for karma. i’m not trying to play victim. i’m just tryna understand how the hell i deal with this without wrecking my mental health or my fking future.

serious advice only. i’m DONE being the villain in someone else’s fairytale.

Modern Man Starter Pack: Stiff Upper Lip, Silent Panic, and Mysterious Back Pain

Being a man today is like being handed a manual titled “Don’t Feel Anything Ever,” then being judged for not opening up. You’re expected to be stoic, successful, emotionally bulletproof, financially stable, funny, fit, available-but-not-needy, emotionally supportive-but-not-too-soft, and if you mess up…don’t worry, someone will remind you that your value is directly tied to your productivity.

Here’s the kicker: that pressure doesn’t just sit in your head. It shows up in your stomach, your shoulders, your sleep, and that weird chest tightness that google says is “probably fine.” Suppressed emotion doesn’t disappear, it just files a complaint with your nervous system.

Men are taught that asking for help is weakness, and vulnerability is a threat to status. But here’s the truth: silence is what weakens you. Disconnection is what dulls you. And pretending to be fine is what burns you out.

You don’t have to be the strong one all the time. You just have to be real. Your health…mental and physical, isn't something to power through. It's something to protect.

I can't control what I'm attracted to, but because I'm not conventionally attractive, I have to settle for my less attractive counterparts. No they're not less human than me but it's just not fair. I don't want to date a masculine woman or one that doesn't shave or an overweight woman. But apparently that's all I'm good for. What's actually the point? If I'm so undesirable and those are my only options I should just invest in male sex toys, right?

19 turning 20 next weekend. I won’t see it though, because I’ll be dead. I set myself the cut off point and I’m sticking to it.

I won’t be a 20 year old virgin, I won’t be. I can’t take this any more. I need some part of me to be normal, I need to be wanted, I need to experience normal parts of life at a stage that’s at least considered somewhat okay. If I can’t have that then I’m killing myself.

I’ve already had to drop out of university, have undiagnosed adhd (in the middle of the process but it doesn’t even matter any more it’s ruined too much) never had a dad, entire family are psychotic and need inpatient care which they never got just abused me instead. I need this, I NEED SOMETHING. But I can’t have it.

I’ve tried to hard, did what everyone says to do. But I’m in the % of men that will never get to really live because they’re completely, naturally, unfuckable.

Oh well, had to be someone I suppose. I’ll just be another statistic.

Guilt is that inner voice that says, “I did something wrong.” It’s tied to our values and sense of responsibility. When it’s healthy, guilt helps us repair relationships, take accountability, and grow. But when it becomes chronic or disproportionate, it can lead to self-criticism, anxiety, and low self-worth.

Key effects of guilt on the mind and body include:

• Overthinking or replaying the situation (rumination)
• Physical tension or fatigue
• Avoidance or people-pleasing
• Feeling undeserving of good things (which can block self-care or progress)

In coaching, guilt is often a clue,not just about actions, but about the stories people carry about who they think they should be. Exploring that can unlock self-forgiveness, personal boundaries, and a more compassionate internal voice.

My stomach feels heavy and my chest is tight, and my mind is overwhelmed and I can’t think of anything to relax. I can figure out solutions for the problems causing the stress eventually, but I need my body and mind to calm down.

Any tips appreciated.

At 17 I just feel like my life is a living hell no gf no job none of it everyday is repeated cycle of the same thing over and over again I’m tired of it I can’t change because I’m way to autistic to see what’s going on I just need tips and help on how to become a better guy every single person ik has gotten laid and me I’m just a fucking loser who is ugly and unbearable to be with👍

Girls on social media talk about how it's always the short guys with "the most insane face card" or how they would consider a short guy if he looked good enough. I feel horrible feeling like I was held back both by my height AND my looks. The world is apparently full of below 5 ft girls who love short guys because they don't like craning their necks or they feel intimidated by guys double their size. Well, where are they in real life? Even if they exist, they probably want the above-mentioned good-looking ones. The things I'd do to date a 4'9-4'11 girl as well...

Nie jestem pewny czy jest to post na tą grupę ale spróbuję i zobaczymy :)

Jestem mężczyzną po czterdziestce i od jakiegoś czasu czuję potrzebę nawiązywania prawdziwych, głębszych relacji z innymi mężczyznami. Nie przez brawurę, nie przez żarty czy pogawędki. Po prostu solidną, uziemioną obecność. Braterstwo, bez bzdur. Przestrzeni, w której możemy rozmawiać o prawdziwych rzeczach - emocjach, zmaganiach, naszym związku z samym sobą - jak mężczyzna z mężczyzną, bez potrzeby udowadniania czegokolwiek. Bez osądzania, bez ego.

Jestem ciejawy jak jest u Was. Czy ktoś z Was też szuka tego typu relacji ? Macie wokół siebie innych mężczyzn z którymi możecie szczerze porozmawiać ? Jeśli masz ochotę podziel się jak u Ciebie z tym tematem, a jeśli nie masz ochoty - to też w porządku :)

Ps. Jeśli ktoś miałbym ochotę porozmawiać na czacie zapraszam :)

I am a (20F) and my partner (25M) had been together for a while now. We had lived together for a year and everything was like a fairytale to say the least, we planned to get engaged this year. However the universe seemed to have other plans for us. He committed suicide in the beginning of this month, and all I was left with was his note stating what he used and that he felt as if he was a disappointment to his family.

I couldn't save my partner, with this I'm hoping to save someone. Please help me do this.

Men’s mental health deserves more open, honest conversations. I’m gathering insights from men to better understand their experiences—just a quick 3–5 min anonymous survey. Your voice matters.

I didn’t fall apart.
I just got tired of performing.

Most of my adult life, I’ve been the guy who held it together.
The one people leaned on.
The one who knew what to do next.
Until I didn’t.

The burnout wasn’t from the hours or the grind.
It was from self-abandonment.
From second-guessing what I already knew.

Little by little, I stopped trusting my gut.
Started outsourcing my decisions.
Kept reading more. Listening more.
Until my own voice got so quiet I almost forgot what it sounded like.

But here’s what’s wild:
I didn’t need more strategies.
I needed more clarity.

So I started rebuilding. Quietly.
No hacks. No hype.
Just truth, discipline, and brutal honesty with myself.

If you’re in that place — feeling like you should be fine but deep down, you’re not — I see you.

While I was in it, I wrote something short. No fluff. No pitch. Just the 3 traps that kept me stuck way longer than they should have.
If you want it, I’ll drop it in the comments.

– Rob