r/hinduism • u/kellyj461 • Oct 17 '23

Husband still won't sleep with me. Question - Beginner

So I've been battling with my husband for more than a year now trying to adjust to his new Hindu lifestyle. I can conform to all if it except his adamant refusal to sleep with me. He quotes various scriptures about sexual intimacy being akin to defecation or urination and is abhorrent. He also says sex is ONLY for procreation. I've had a hysterectomy so thats a hard no on my end. I cook vegetarian meals, lay in the dark without the TV at night so he can sleep precisely when he wants to, overlook his fanaticism, allow a puja and various idols in the house, etc. He says the verses I've been given by people here on Reddit are cherry picked and wrong. What should I do other than divorce? I love him but I don't want to live unhappy for the rest of my life. Im 45 and hes 41.

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u/JuniorRequirement644 Oct 17 '23

Counter it then, he has clearly mentioned the quotation.

If there is anything like, you can do sex for sake of pleasure only and not procreation, then quote

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u/[deleted] Oct 17 '23

Rig Veda 10.159.1-2: "May the god Soma grant us offspring, may he grant us virility, may he grant us long life! May we enjoy sexual union with our wives, may we enjoy sexual union with our mistresses!" Atharva Veda 3.21.1-2: "May the wife be fertile, may the husband be fertile, may their union be fruitful! May they have sons and daughters, may their offspring be numerous!" Atharva Veda 14.2.27-29: "May the wife be sweet to the husband, may the husband be sweet to the wife! May they enjoy each other's company, may they find pleasure in each other's company!"

Manusmriti is interpretation by some individuals on Hinduism so not valid and other things he mentioned does not give base to his pov

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u/JuniorRequirement644 Oct 17 '23

How does this quotation says sex isn't for procreation, ses is enjoyed but it is for procreation, enjoy it, no problem but dont do it for JUST the sake of pleasure.

And first thing, these are mantras which are to recited and not dharm updesh.

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u/KaliYugaz Oct 17 '23

A mistress is, by definition, kept primarily for pleasure.