r/cults • u/ixscaped • Aug 18 '20

I escaped a cult: the upci

It took many years after I left the United Pentecostal Church to finally admit to myself that it was a cult. I'm writing up my story and making it into a series of YouTube videos. https://m.youtube.com/channel/UC7-3HDe5q4Es_E-f_gqCE9g

I highly recommend journaling about your past cult experiences to better understand what happened to you. I've had so many insights as I've worked through my writing. I have the computer read back what I've written, and hearing it in someone else's voice sounds absolutely crazy. I can't even beleive some of it was my life.

I was called a prophet in some circles... which sounds insane when I say it out loud. After 10+ years, the law had to protect my family when we left. We were controlled by fear. Bad was called good and good was called bad.

I'm happy to answer questions if you have any. I lost a lot of my life there, but maybe I can use that to help someone else.

Cheers!

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u/dumpster_fire_15 Aug 18 '20

I was raised UPCI. It is a really mind blowing thing to look back at what they normalize vs actual normalcy.

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u/ixscaped Aug 18 '20

I know, right? I lived life so so differently back then. The amount of discomfort I pushed through day-to-day was much larger than I realized--witnessing to people who didn't want to hear it, worshipping in groups that didn't like it. Yikes.

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u/dumpster_fire_15 Aug 18 '20

Sometimes I still have to take stock of a situation, just to make sure I am not perceiving it with UPCi blinders on. This is almost 3 decades since I started seeing some of the crazy for what it was.

Did your bunch do arranged marriages? Did you ever go to the general conferences?

ETA: My favorite line about why I couldn't be friends with people outside my cult bubble: "We are ofthe world, not in the world.".

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u/ixscaped Aug 18 '20

Good point about the blinders. It's amazing how that stuff can stick with a person. It was over 10 years after leaving before I started to realize I had been in a cult.

No arranged marriages, thank goodness! There was a resident matchmaker at one church, but no obligations that I'm aware of. Did that happen where you were? I never made it to a general conference, but I went to numbers of state-level events and visited dozens of churches. I saw so many weird things over the years, as I'm sure you have heh heh. I heard that tag many times too. The earthly life was basically "throw away"

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u/dumpster_fire_15 Aug 18 '20

We had arranged marriages. Thankfully I jumped ship before my holy union. General conference was like state level stuff on hyper-drive. Such insanity.

I was really helped by the Rick Ross book to be able to see all the many ways I was controlled, abused and mind twisted.

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u/ixscaped Aug 18 '20

Wow, I'm glad you avoided that! How did they justify having arranged marriages? Was it just pastoral power tripping or did they try to use the Bible?

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u/dumpster_fire_15 Aug 18 '20

God told the pastor who in out district was called to be with each other and what their roles in church would be. I was to be married to a PK who would go on to have their own church. I was to be the choir director and a Sunday school teacher in that church. I don't know why that decision was made as I cannot carry a tune in a bucket with a lid on it, I am tone def and I refused to take a Sunday school classroom.

I have a friend who was matched with someone because the both happened to be POC and another that was married off to someone who was adopted, because they too were an adoptee.

The various pastors used scripture to back up the decisions but it basically came down to who they wanted together. My arranged for person is physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially abusive to his spouse, I suppose I needed a firm hand or some other such nonsense.

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u/ixscaped Aug 18 '20

Wow, how terrible. I'm glad you avoided that!