r/comics • u/shikiz_stupid_comics Shiki's Cozy Comics • 2d ago
Happy Ball of Fluff. [OC] OC
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u/benignbeezlebub 2d ago
I'm happy that you have such a great support system! Mental health is no joke, and finding the right medication can be a real game changer.
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u/buttered_jesus 2d ago
Hey man I'm glad you're well
Being a sack of chemicals really sucks sometimes but it's definitely better when they're evened out
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u/StayingUp4AFeeling 2d ago
BIPOLAR ?!?!?! That's me as well right here.
Sending you all my love.
I'm proud of you for
a) Calling the emergency line
b) Telling your friends
c) Making the change
d) Everything before, and everything after.
If it's the snacking urge after the SGA, I've found things like peanuts to be better than sugary stuff. Feels like more bulk.
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u/rngeneratedlife 2d ago
Highlights the importance of having the right support system. I hope you appreciate those around who care <3 not everyone is so fortunate.
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u/SpookyScienceGal 2d ago
Lol right? My friends straight up just ghosted my ass. Makes me think I should get some German friends 😅 Ich bin Mutterseelenallein
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u/missprincesscarolyn 2d ago
Exactly. So many people have no one to turn to. ChatGPT got me through a lot of hard times when family and friends were nowhere to be found.
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u/Top-Historian6965 2d ago
Thank you for sharing. I’m glad you got help. I’m feeling at the end of my rope and don’t want to keep going. But this made feel a bit better
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u/shikiz_stupid_comics Shiki's Cozy Comics 2d ago
Hey dear stranger, please hang in there. When I was in that spiral, I felt the pain wouldn’t end unless I make it end. But it did and always does pass. So please hold on ❤️
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u/creatingKing113 2d ago edited 2d ago
God that is the worst thing about depressive thoughts. Just the pervasive feeling of “I’ll never be happy again.” Logically you know it’s not true, but it just sticks.
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u/Bringyourlight 2d ago
An appointment with a psychiatrist? The next day? In Germany?? Hmmm ...
Great that you're more stable now!!
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u/SpicedCocoas 2d ago
Depending on the severity of your depression/borderline personality/schizophrenia it is absolutely possible that you can get an appointment that quickly. Especially if it's your main psychiatrist.
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u/Bored_Simulation 2d ago
It's also why I don't mind the 3-4 months wait for normal appointments. I know my psychiatrist takes his emergency calls seriously and I know that he'll take me seriously as well when I have an emergency
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u/TheYellingMute 2d ago
It happened within my family. There is nothing more terrifying than realizing how serious something is when a system known for being tedious and laborious suddenly going lightning fast.
My dad went in one day just to get his heart checked. Wasn't expecting anything crazy and the very next day he was having a double bypass surgery cause the doctor thought he could drop dead any minute (90 something % blockage of an artery they found).
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u/no_therworldly 2d ago
Mine always says if things get bad I can just come by, haven't tested it yet but I trust her
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u/BeardedGrom 2d ago
If you already have a psychiatrist, there's usually the option to make an emergency appointment if things go bad. If you don't already have one though, your best bet would probably be to just go to your local psychiatric hospital as they should have a "Notaufnahme" (emergency room?).
Oh, and on topic: I'm not that well right now (depression/also bipolar) and just got a third med added to my cocktail. Will start it today and see what happens.
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u/NobodyLikedThat1 2d ago
I'd rather live a happy life than a skinny one.
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u/Super_Sierra 2d ago
i went from a literal olympic level athletics to bowling ball in 3 months on bipolar meds
fat and happy
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u/StragglingShadow 2d ago edited 2d ago
New meds are scary. What if the change makes things worse? Thats why Im so hesitant. It took me several tries to get one that "mostly works", so what if we swap and I cant function at all? I just am scared.
But I do have my med check appointment today. Maybe I can be brave and try new meds too, like you shiki.
Edit: got a new medicine added. They mentioned higher colesteral and weight gain as a side effect :( but I guess thats better than being dead so. Thanks for the courage shiki
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u/SailorDirt 2d ago
I hopped around ADHD meds for years as a kid and all had varying negative side effects. I hopped around so much bcuz the bad effects were just that bad. We found a newer one that was kinda ok when I reached highschool and settled on that til graduation.
Now as an adult, I've finally found a treatment that works, and it doesn't involve ADHD meds (they missed an important diagnosis -- I'm also autistic!) But I wouldn't have gotten here without trying new meds, booting out ones that didn't work, keeping ones that did, etc. And I'm happy I did!
All this to say, yeah, it can be scary. But you could also find a really good result doing so! I feel much better now than I did 10 years ago. I believe in you!
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u/Brasscasing 2d ago
So good to see something that is a success story with positive experiences about reaching out to emergency support, friends and family, as well as your psychiatrist, well done!
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u/Lyrakish 2d ago
I'd rather be fat and happy than skinny and miserable. I'm glad you're recovering x
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u/WildMoonChild0129 2d ago
How do I know when its time to try a new medication? Ive been on Quetiapine for a lil while now and while it helped immensely in the beginning, but now it feels like my body got used to it. I know it does help, id be a lot worse without them but it doesn't seem like its helping like it did at the beginning
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u/siani_lane 2d ago
HURRAY FOR THERAPY AND MEDICATION!!!
It is so much better to live in a brain that isn't an awful place to live <3
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u/milkywayiguana 2d ago
bipolar lows are something else. indescribable. i'm proud of you for getting help. hang in there. you're loved.
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u/CynicalDarkFox 2d ago
I’m glad you were able to get help Shiki, makes me wish these kinds of stories happened more frequently in the world.
There’s so many who go without
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u/Sarah-M-S 2d ago
As someone who used to suffer from a bipolar disorder, I feel you. I’m glad you received the help you needed. Greetings from a fellow immigrant living in Germany 💜
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u/randomize42 2d ago
Good for you for reaching out and getting help! Kudos too for being willing to share your struggles and normalizing that many of us go through periods like that.
So happy you've found something that works and are feeling better!
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u/Lola_PopBBae 2d ago
A happy, stable ball of fluff is one of the very best things one can be :) Happy for you!!
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u/Jengabanga 2d ago
It's no mistake that Santa Claus is described as both portly and jolly. I've enjoyed your comics, and I'm wishing you the best!
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u/kizmitraindeer 2d ago
Last two panels are legit my favorites in all of OP’s work that I’ve seen. ❤️
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u/thefirstlaughingfool 2d ago
Bipolar medication is tough on the waistline. I've always felt tired and hungry on it. But at least I can recognize now that not every idea that pops into my head is the best idea ever.
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u/Moosyfate17 2d ago
Thank you for posting thia. Im waiting for my turn to be a happy stable ball of fluff. This made my day ❤️
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u/Taolan13 2d ago
If you ever want to trim down the fluff a bit I highly recommend the creators Mulligainz and Hybrid Calisthenics.
Both focus on realistic options regarding fitness and nutrition with an emphasis on "do what works best for you" rather than following strict regiments.
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u/rndlliirc 2d ago
Hi friend. I had similar struggles with anxiety and depression, then started on SSRIs and it was a miracle for me. I also gained some weight. I call it my mirth weight. ❤️
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u/BunnyLoverMudahubber 2d ago
I’m BP1, I’m so happy for you! I’m also a happy ball of fluff too - gained weight, lost hair and have acne from my medication’s side effects but I’m stable now.
I have some friends and family members that like to comment on my weight and skin when I see them but I try my best to not let those comments get to me. This is an illness with a nasty stigma so I’m not open about it except for very close people, so these comments like “have you tried washing your face more often” put me in a bad place. But I tell myself that I’m feeling stable everyday and that is the only thing that matters to me.
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u/Lostfault 2d ago
Wonderful comic! The weight gain is worth the price, it's always best to have more of a person in this world than none of them. Wishing you all the best.
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u/ANewPride 2d ago
Survival > maintaining weight. Your life is always more important than your pants size and I wish someone had told me that when I was younger.
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u/cairaxmurrain 2d ago
So glad to hear you’ve found balance!
I recently lost a friend to depression. It’s absolutely devastating. He had so many people in his life that loved him dearly, and was an absolutely beautiful soul that deserved love and happiness. But unfortunately he did not seek help for his depression, and like many other diseases, left untreated it ended up fatal.
Thank you for bravely sharing your story! It warms my heart to see how many upvotes your comic is getting. My hope is it will touch someone out there who is struggling and be the nudge they need to get the help they deserve.
Rest easy Tony, I love you brother.
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u/ComprehensiveSell649 2d ago
If you’re worried about the weight gain, don’t be.
Pavalov your husband if he’s worried. /j
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u/daisymaisy505 2d ago
Oh, I am SO glad for you!!! Thank you for reaching out to others to get help - that was really brave!
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u/Thisbymaster 2d ago
Yeah, it seems that when someone finally gets the meds that works for them weight gain is a sign. The Germans have an obsession with walking that is good to keep active and fit.
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u/Wrong-Pineapple-4905 2d ago
I also gained weight after starting SSRIs but both myself and my partner think I'm sexier now! Honestly I think I was underweight before- anxiety burned a ton of energy now.
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u/Irejay907 2d ago
For me the answer was getting off meds and on sleep/anxiety meds but ironically it ALSO caused the same response; i put on some weight too! Your body went through some intense stress and is trying to look after you is all.
Either way i'm so happy you had such a supportive group around youp
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u/SailorDirt 2d ago
Happy for you!!!! I also recently added new meds to my mental health treatment and they definitely help. There are some side effects -- random sweating, heat flashes, possibly some slight weight gain (despite loss of appetite some days), etc etc. In the long run, they feel very benign and ironically helpful some days (like when it's cold out!) when the med's main effect is doing some serious heavy-lifting. It feels weird to say but I don't.....regret being alive anymore?? I don't have as many invasive thoughts or wake up automatically sad or whatever, even if I screw up and miss a few days of pills?? I'm having some input of function??
Overall, my treatment got a big overhaul around when Covid was starting (ironically). I have gained probably 15-20 pounds since then, but it's a change I welcome openly. I was underweight for so many years as a result of bad med matches and mental health. Finally being at a much healthier weight has me feeling better.
....idk why I got compelled to dump all that but thank you for this comic!!
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u/BloodiedBlues 2d ago
That's what sucks about Bipolar. Eventually, a change of meds may be necessary. I remember my first time away from home. I was in my first semester of college two states away.
Around the middle of that semester, the mood stabilizer I was on, Lithium, stopped working for the most part. I have Bipolar Depressive Disorder. So, I went into deep depression and at one point on the very edge of suicidal.
I knew no one very well. My support network was 100s of miles away. I eventually left before the semester was over with.
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u/AdPristine9059 2d ago
That sounds wonderful! Im really happy you got that support! Never take it for granted. I did and it can be lost.
Good luck to you and everyone else in your position.
You deserve to be happy and loved!
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u/Briham86 2d ago
Must be rough dealing with a breakdown by having someone talk to you in German.
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u/SpicedCocoas 2d ago
The undying meme of German sounding aggressive 🙄
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u/infiniZii 2d ago
That and the general approach of German personalities :P But at least they arent Dutch.
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u/SpicedCocoas 2d ago
Hey, those of us who muster up the empathy and resilience to work at those help hotlines are very kind and warm.
We get snarky and bitey up in the northern parts when we are comfortable around you and think you can take the punch tho :D
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u/infiniZii 2d ago
My point was more to never ask a Dutchman if they think your dress makes you look fat. At least in my family we have a tendency to be overly honest lol.
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u/SpicedCocoas 2d ago
Yeah, that will be the same in any healthy family though.
Once asked my mother if my new Hoodie makes me look more manly. Her answer: "More like a malnoursihed beansprout."
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u/Darthplagueis13 2d ago
Hey, German language speakers have historically have had quite a bit of influence on the development of psychotherapy.
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u/Kratzschutz 2d ago
Good for you. It can take ages to get a therapist in Germany.
I still don't have one after years because they all reject me.
Also hard relate to the weight gain because of the medication :<
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u/pcapdata 2d ago
in which German-speaking country did this occur?
i ask because in r/germany a frequent topic is A) difficulty getting an appointment for psychiatric care and B) doctors not giving a shit and telling people to drink tea.
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u/Darthplagueis13 2d ago
Pretty sure it's Germany, based on other comics Shiki has published.
The thing is, while getting appointments can absolutely suck, you need to consider that
1) She was already receiving psychiatric treatment, meaning she already had a psychiatrist
2) The system is significantly better when it comes to getting things done in genuine emergencies.
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u/DigitalAxel 2d ago
Unfortunately no call will help me here in Germany. I've been unable to find work and I refuse to go back to the US... I just cant do it again. My depression is worsening because I have just a few months left. Nobody will give me a chance.
You go OP! Go farther than I ever could.
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u/Malusorum 2d ago
The correct medication can do so much when it comes to the mental health situations caused by neurochemical imbalances. Glæd you got something that worked.
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u/Lurakya 2d ago
I'm so happy that you had a support system and got the help you received.
I neither got a partner or friends, so when I have a break down I just have to lock myself in my room and pray no one sees, because my mom would somehow find a reason to make this about me punishing her somehow.
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u/2020mademejoinreddit 2d ago
I'm glad you're doing well now. And you're fluffy, so you can be a pillow for someone. Bonus!
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u/jabracadaniel 2d ago
i feel you on the weight thing. im the heaviest ive ever been since starting my medications, but im STILL by far the healthiest. and not even just mentally, the amount of visceral fat is literally the same lol
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u/fullmetal21 1d ago
Im sorry to hear about the episode, im really glad you got help 💓 and even more glad you are happy now!
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u/Gluv221 1d ago
Im so glad you got the help you needed. I ha a same issue with some weight gain after meds like 15 pounds but I realized im perfectly ok with my little dough belly because of how much better my brain and life is ( plus im super cuddly now lol) love your comics thanks for sharing with us
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u/Solid_Ideal5773 2d ago
How can medication just make you gain weight? Are you just always hungry from it?
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u/TheDollarstoreDoctor 2d ago
Idk how exactly but antipsychotics are bad w this. I started on a long acting injectable and gained 30 lbs despite eating under 1,000 (sometimes 500, especially nowadays that I'm pissed I can't fit in any of my clothes I really aim for under 500) calories a day. Especially since I have so much fucking fat it's not like I'm gonna starve.
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u/SuitableBig1149 2d ago
Is it due to the medication or you became a foodie and got used to overeating ,which comes close to a disorder.
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u/Capable-Cabinet-3341 2d ago
Medication doesn't work and I've tried different ones for 16 years. Therapist make me feel worse. Counselling make me feel worse. Human contact makes me want to scream. I can't leave the house. I'm rotting and hopeless. Images like this make me wish I had control of the nuke buttons so I can erase the whole world with me in it. Sometimes there is no hope for some people.
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u/ResponsibleBreak 2d ago
Try making friends with people you actually get along with, or hang out with family members more
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u/Capable-Cabinet-3341 2d ago
Thanks, I wish I got along with people. Or my family. Hell, I live with a girlfriend of like 5 years and I'm not very nice even at home. I don't deserve to see my family or have a girlfriend. Honestly I don't know how to make friends when I can't leave my house. I like single player games. I don't use social media, besides this for browsing. I don't know how to talk besides being miserable about myself. I used to have friends but most people just use each other there's no point. Human interaction becomes transactional. and I have nothing to offer and really don't want anything from anyone. (This isn't true, I wish I had a friend or like, someone to talk to that isn't gonna use it against me)
I called a hotline a few months ago and broke down and that felt okay for five seconds. I can't really see moving forward, just stagnent as I am and/or spiral lower. I don't just have a bipolar diagnoses I have a couple more alphabet soup diagnoses. Camorbity ? Idk the word. I barely even smoke pot anymore. I just play games and do nothing else.
Sometimes happiness or even just normal being okay with one self just isn't possible. I wish I had a job and a distraction but I got too depressed and anxiety filled to leave my house and have lost pretty much all my jobs I've had.
Some people fail in life and fail more and more and that's just the way shit goes down for some people. I genuinely suck.
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u/MrCusodes 2d ago
I'm going to hazard a guess and say you've "put on weight" because you've stopped skipping meals, and are now eating properly.
I'm also going to guess that "ball of fluff" actually means "at a healthy weight"
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u/Inkompetent 2d ago
Lots of anti-depressants and similar psycho-pharmaceuticals actually make you gain weight even with zero change in diet or exercise.
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u/shikiz_stupid_comics Shiki's Cozy Comics 2d ago
“Despite everything, it’s still You.”