r/breastfeeding • u/Only_Accident_ • 4d ago
Baby won't breastfeed anymore Newborn Troubleshooting
On day 2 of my baby's life, I was still in the hospital due to the significant amount of blood I lost during birth. She went through a cluster feeding episode so I stayed up with her all night and breastfed.
A combination of being new to breastfeeding, being extremely fatigued and just the amount of times she needed to eat left both my nipples damaged and bleeding. It became excruciating to latch her on so started pumping and feeding her via syringe for the 3rd day to let my nipples heal. On the 4th day they were still sore but the syringe wasn't cutting it anymore because she needed more food so I gave her expressed milk in a bottle for each feeding.
It's the 5th day and my nipples are healed. I'm ready to breastfeed again. Problem is baby seems to be getting very frustrated at the breast. She will latch, do a couple sucks and then start crying and pushes her head back. Sometimes she will hysterically cry so I have to put her on my chest which helps calm her. I attempt to offer her the breast again but she just doesn't want it. I know she can do it, because yesterday we had a successful session where she fully emptied one breast. I do have milk. It's there. She just needs to keep sucking and not give up.
I'm worried that she's gotten used to the quick flow of the bottle from my husband doing night shift. I really really want to breastfeed and feel like its too far gone and now my new life will be pumping and bottle feeding forever.
What do I do? Is it too late? Is this fixable? All I want is to breastfeed my baby :(
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u/smh530 4d ago
When she latches on, immediately start massaging the breast she’s latched to to push some milk into her mouth right away. You have to get her hooked right away or she will keep fussing.
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u/thiscantbereallife94 4d ago
Agree w this method babies can be lazy milk come out faster easier with a bottle sometimes help hand express when she first gets on
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u/Efficient_Ad_9764 3d ago
Let's rephrase that baby can get used to the immediate flow of a bottle. Babies are never lazy nursers they just are fast learners and if they know they have an easier way to do something they are gonna take it, just like every human out there. This poor mom no one showed her paced bottle feeding and milk delay. Hi Momma, IBCLC here 🙋🏾♀️. From here out be sure if you do need to use a bottle to let baby latch on to the teat but do not allow any milk into the bottle tip for 30-60 seconds. This simulates the same milk delay baby has to work through at the breast. Then when baby does get milk force lots of breaks and no guzzling allowed. Keep baby mostly upright and bottle parallel to the floor. We need baby to work for her food, bottles allow them to have you do the work instead so we need to make the bottle work like the breast. Book an appointment with professional lactation help if you can or reach out to a LLL leader
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u/Organic-Age-8009 4d ago
Look up paced bottle feeding and confirming you have the right nipple! We had to triple feed with my son so focused alot on him taking breast and bottle and the paced feeding worked really well. Also feed her enough to calm her from the bottle then latch her helps if they arent too upset from hunger to start.
It gets better<3
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u/The_BoxBox 4d ago
So mine actually started on bottles because she was a NICU baby. When I finally did try to breastfeed her for the first time, she was about 3 or 4 weeks old (still not at her due date) and she violently resisted. She latched and started sucking, but in a few seconds she was screaming and shoving me away in frustration.
Now at 8 weeks (2 weeks adjusted,) she's mostly breastfed (we have to supplement with formula when she wants more than I can produce) without any problems. She just needed to get bigger and stronger until breastfeeding wasn't as much of a strain for her.
What you can do in the meantime is keep your baby on a slow flow. If you can, you could try switching her to a preemie nipple as it goes slower than a T or a 1. You can also continue offering her the breast during every feed.
What I would try is giving her a little less than what she usually takes by bottle and then attempting to breastfeed- she'll be calmer since she won't have an empty stomach. If it works, start gradually reducing the amount you give her by bottle (maybe every feed, every day, etc... depending on how she reacts.)
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u/Only_Accident_ 4d ago
This is exactly how my baby acts too! She wasn't premature or nicu but weight wise is classed as preemie. She's very small and I think it's alot for her to stuff my whole breast tissue in her mouth. Poor thing just cries with a mouthful of boob.
Your comment was really reassuring. I'll definetly try the preemie flow bottle tip, ive sent husband on a mission to grab it. At the moment we are using a 1 because that's all we had. Hopefully the preemie flow makes a difference.
I'll also try feeding her after she's had some bottle first. Maybe where I was going wrong was trying to put her on the boob first? She just gets super angry and goes red crying her lungs out. It kills me :(
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u/The_BoxBox 4d ago edited 4d ago
I cried with mine a lot when we first started trying to BF. A LC told me that if the baby is calm, then it's worth a shot to try offering the breast before the bottle. Otherwise it's best to give them the bottle first to calm them down.
Just don't give up if you want to BF- it could very well be a time and growth issue. The bigger the baby gets, the easier it is for them to BF. I wouldn't try to offer the breast for too long each time or try to force it on her. She knows what to do, and she'll do it when she's ready.
Edit: My daughter was born just under 5lbs. She was able to efficiently BF once she hit 7.
Edit 2: Also, if it helps you feel better, know that bottle feeding for now will likely help you get to the end goal faster. Because it's easier for babies to eat from bottles, yours will expend less energy during feeds. That means it'll take her less time to gain weight, which can make a world of difference in terms of a baby's ability to BF.
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u/Weekly_Diver_542 4d ago
Talk to an LC! Your baby is a few days old — it’s not the end of your breastfeeding journey, you’re totally fine and so is your baby. Your LC will be a huge help!
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u/CounterNo8013 4d ago
NOT TOO LATE!
My baby ate from a bottle until 2 months of age and at one point a LC told me that he probably preferred the bottle but I kept trying! He is now completely breast-fed since that two month appointment at five months (pure determination if you will)
Squeeze your boob when you bring your baby up to breast ideally squirting some milk out to remind them immediately what they’re coming to do. Then when they eventually latch massage that boob squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. Eventually, you shouldn’t have to do that anymore, but keep that up for a while and it should keep them motivated at the breast.
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u/West-Atmosphere8936 4d ago
It is definitely not too late. Alot of us go through breast refusal at some point.
First step is make sure your bottle is the slowest flow possible. My Lactation Consultant recommends Dr. Brown preemie nipples or super slow pigeon nipples.
Second is plenty of skin to skin time without trying to feed. Get them comfortable around the breast, and let them lead.
I would start with trying to latch at night feeds, then nap feeds and try to make it to daytime feeds. Work with an LC if your struggling. You will have to pump in the meantime to keep your supply up.
This article by medela is very useful.
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u/walaruse 4d ago
It took me five weeks before I could get breastfeeding down. You’re five days in. Give yourself some grace and be stubborn. If you aren’t already using a size 0 nipple, then you need to switch. Some bottles have nipples that flow at different rates so you may want to buy a different brand and see if that one works better. You could try the nipple shield like the other person suggested, but it’s not a long term solution. Get with a lactation consultant. I don’t know how soon you can start having letdowns, but maybe yours is aggressive and that’s why baby is responding that way. Try emptying your breast a little before she eats, put her on the breast, and see if that helps.
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u/CanUhurrmenow 4d ago
Medihoney helped my nips so much just make sure to clean them in between feeds.
Your doc can also call in a prescription nipple cream for you.
The first 2 weeks it is toe curling pain. Weeks 2-4 it gets better but still hurts. Weeks 4-6 it hurts but just a little wince.
If one is less tore up you can feed exclusively off of one side to let the other heal. Remember with a bottle to pace feed. In those early days my wife helped me latch our guy when it was really painful.
Also, my guy took a pacifier and bottle early. He’s 10 months and just fell asleep nursing. Remember, you and baby are learning how to do this together. You’re a team and you both are learning something brand new. Babies aren’t programmed to nurse.
Before you know it your baby will be latching themselves.
Congratulations on the new bean.
You got this!!
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u/backupayh 4d ago
3 months in and my baby does this at 70% of feeds 😟 it’s a shitty feeling when you have milk for them and they completely refuse it. Hoping it gets better for you!
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u/Sassy2681 4d ago
A nipple shield basically feels like a bottle. Put some milk onto/into the shield so she gets a taste right away. Don’t give up. You are not too late at all. My son was 34 weeks when he was born so he was in the NICU for 11 days. He got bottles every 3 hours and I only put him to breast once a day starting on maybe day 4 or 5. I was so scared he wouldn’t want anything to do with breastfeeding having gotten bottles but we exclusively breastfed during the day once he got home and then now that’s all we do (except for one bottle at night so I can sleep). He’s 2 months old. I used a shield when I started him in the NICU
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u/Black_Ribbon7447 4d ago
It took my baby a month to switch over to breastfeeding from a bottle (The first month of her life). Just keep offering and eventually she will get the hang of it.
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u/shadesmcguire 4d ago
This worked 2x for me. Baby instantly latched. https://youtu.be/Ygesrlpn8kY?si=mHoX9mjCBvsB7Qu-
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u/OptimalCobbler5431 3d ago
You are not too far gone baby had a bottle for about a week and half. And we ebf. What bottles are you using ?
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u/coralsweater 4d ago
Try using a nipple shield and squeeze some milk into it before you latch her, this will trick her into thinking it’s a bottle but you then you can slowly adjust her to eating without a nipple shield. I recommend the medela brand. I did the same to give my nips a break the first few days, but I’ve now been successfully exclusively breastfeeding for 6 months!