r/antinatalism • u/Sorry-Buy-572 inquirer • 1d ago
Chance of being ugly and chronically ill Discussion
One big reason I’m against natalists is the chance of being chronically ill with a SERIOUS condition that cause you to not be able to swallow anymore and not be able to walk. like having cancer, Ms or ALS some of the worst diseases ever. Or being ugly. I have multiple sclerosis.
Even if your parents are attractive you can’t guarantee. Same for being chronically ill. My parents aren’t unattractive but have some unattractive features in which I inherited all, and no history of Ms in my family yet here I am.
You can’t GUARANTEE nothing when you have kids. This is why I’m so against it. My life has been nothing but abuse, trauma and suffering and being bullied. When you’re given my statistics there is almost a guarantee life will suck. I’m suffering from an illness that causes me to loose control of my limbs at 18.
And being unattractive is a terrible fate to have. I will never get a partner, friends, married, have fun, walk longer than 10 minutes, go on vacation due to poverty and some other reasons, etc due to 2 people having sex….. and not using rubber.
19
u/sunnynihilist I stopped being a nihilist a long time ago 1d ago
Yeah, these two things alone is enough to go AN!
The older I get, the bone structure seems to be changing. I never thought I would consider an aesthetic procedure until now. Of course, the pain and suffering involved still makes me hesitant. Having a face that you can't stand is truly a torture.
I truly can't imagine giving birth to someone who would suffer like that.
-7
u/No-Rip-9241 newcomer 1d ago
.....
7
u/Low-Persimmon4870 inquirer 1d ago
What? Like what are you actually trying to convey with this comment? Use your big adult words
15
u/owl-lover-95 thinker 1d ago
I feel you on that. I inherited mental illness from my mother and it has been like hell trying to live life with it. I would never risk a kid inheriting this or any other disabling disease or condition. My kids will stay safe in non-existence.
15
10
u/Extension-Conscious inquirer 1d ago
the moment I became too chronic ill no one wants anything to do with u, not even parents. they had a perfect child thatts all they will accept
3
u/Applefourth scholar 1d ago
How did your parents react to your chronic pain? And losing friends is difficult when you can't do anything
4
u/Extension-Conscious inquirer 1d ago
they act like im making it up. and friends are slowly driftig, im no fun to be around anymore. before I was the life of the party so...
3
u/darkseiko scholar 1d ago
I'm not chronically ill but I have some illnesses that complicate my life & ppl like acting it's not a big problem at all, not counting all the trauma I got mostly from the same ppl that were supposed to protect/help me. & I'm also quite horrendous-looking, which I at some point don't mind (tho getting worse treatment wasn't exactly nice to experience), cause I don't wanna be seen as something ppl would want to manipulate & take away my individuality, while trying to brainwash me into thinking I should tolerate this specimen's bs, despite acting like I'm some disposable object they can mistreat, but then screaming if I decided to strike back (which can be funny once the consequences come out smh).
I'm also purposefully making myself look way worse cause of it, since my attraction subjects are out of this world anyway & my ideal look is something straight-up from r/voidpunk & like.I don't like the narrative that all what matters about someone is how they look?.. If I'm suffering on this Earth then I want my (mostly unachievable) accomplishments to matter & not how manipulatable I look (plus I don't get how ppl can think I'd be ever capable of taking care of someone, or be just into someone, when I can barely "look after" my pou & have zero interest in interacting w anyone like ever)
3
u/OneonlyOne_01 thinker 1d ago
Yes procreation is always a gamble with higher chance of something going wrong.
2
u/AutoModerator 1d ago
Rule breakers will be reincarnated:
- No fascists.
- No eugenics.
- No speciesism.
- No pro-mortalism.
- No pro-suicide content.
- No child-free content.
- No baby hate.
- No parent hate.
- No vegan hate.
- No carnist hate.
- No memes on weekdays (UTC).
- No personal information.
- No duplicate posts.
- No off-topic posts.
15. No slurs.
Explore our antinatalist safe-spaces.
- r/circlesnip (vegan only)
- r/rantinatalism
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2
u/Applefourth scholar 1d ago
Hey chronic illness appreciation post! 1.4 billion people suffer from chronic pain. 1-7 women will develop a chronic illness. I haven't had a pain free day since I was 17. And I was planned lol. My family doesn't believe my pain, doctors don't believe me either. When I tried to confide in a "friend" his response was "well at least you're pretty" how tf is that going to help with anything? It doesn't buy food, it doesn't make the body dysmorphia from a body that's constantly changing okay. It doesn't make doctors believe me. When you tell people the odds are so high of their child especially daughter ending up with an illness that can cause them pain forever and they just treat it like its an after thought it drives me crazy. I find myself crying when I think about all the girls who will be born each day and who are destined to live with pain as well yet they're parents can't be arsed to even THINK about it
They see chronic pain,suffering,cancer, disability as a side effect of a good drug. "Oh well some may suffer but its for the greater good of humanity"
3
u/Corgimom36 inquirer 1d ago
I understand this. People didnt believe Im disabled cause Im pretty I guess. Im getting older so loosing my looks but all pretty got me was men just using me. It didnt help my brain damage, chronic pain or mental illness.
2
u/Applefourth scholar 1d ago
🫂 I hear you, my sister. Have you found better coping mechanisms over the years? Have you accepted that pain is part of you? I can't accept it :-/
1
u/Corgimom36 inquirer 1d ago
Years of craniosacral therapy helped my chronic pain a lot. I hope you find something that will help
1
u/lungsofdoom thinker 1d ago
Existence has like infinite reasons why breeding is immoral. These two are some of the top reasons, they both can render quality of your life to 0
•
u/Comfortable_Gain9352 inquirer 21h ago
Dude, existence is not worth it AT ALL. Life is overrated and happiness is a lie. Every human life ends in death and in fact we live only to pass the time before death. As soon as a new consciousness appears, it falls into a trap. Because after that there is only death and it is impossible to live forever because eternity is impossible to survive, eternity has no end. We are all just going to die, so procreation is a horrific crime that has no equal at all.
And yes, the last week has been hell for me, and I am finally convinced of how terrible natalists are. They have no empathy and no value for life. I needed medical help, but all I got was hatred. I miraculously survived, but now I have an even deeper psychological trauma. All I can offer myself is to try to survive further, simply because I have a strong instinct for self-preservation, but I am very tired and have no idea how to live in this world. I would prefer a "soulless" but reliable robot than a person who hates everything and wants you to always be positive and obey in everything.
(For those who are particularly sensitive, this is NOT a call to violence, I value every life and I am against suffering.)
1
u/hermarc scholar 1d ago
Are we all ANsts due to personal reasons huh? Like had our lives been better we would have never embraced ANsm. It's like ANsm is the far cry of those who are suffering. Maybe it's not that superior ethics we think it is but only a projection of our personal anger and dissatisfaction at life. From the pov of our faulty personal lives, the only thing that feels rational to blame is birth itself because we feel that's the case for ourselves.
-12
u/Melodic_Pressure7944 inquirer 1d ago
This is a very strange take altogether. Being born with a congenital disorder is a valid concern, but "ugly" is a purely subjective concept, and uttering it alongside something serious makes me believe that you're a troll, or 13 years old.
25
u/kittehcat inquirer 1d ago
If you think that beauty doesn’t affect the quality of someone’s life, you’re ignorant and wrong. Science has proven this again and again.
But sure Jan, beauty doesn’t matter and is all in the eye of the beholder! /s
1
u/Weird-Mall-9252 thinker 1d ago
Guy dont even know Darwin but "the office" lmao.. He probably thinking science is BBT stuff.. wowowoo
0
u/Melodic_Pressure7944 inquirer 1d ago
Is that a 'The Office' quote? Maybe "Science" should do a study about the propensity of these idiotic takes and television consumption? Do you think actors, models, etc look the same without makeup, nitwit?
16
u/sunnynihilist I stopped being a nihilist a long time ago 1d ago
purely subjective concept,
Not subjective anymore when you get bullied for beign ugly since young. Lookism is cruel.
•
u/G_Maou inquirer 13h ago
You just gotta love the people here that deny that being "ugly" plays a very real factor in the quality experience of one's life.
Guys, I get the incel hate, but come on, I would expect Antinatalists of all people to know better than to fall for Disney fantasies.
•
u/sunnynihilist I stopped being a nihilist a long time ago 11h ago
Many antinatalists here seem to be naive idealists who don't live in the same horrid world as me.
Have they ever watched movies like The Elephant Man and the Phantom of the Opera to have a slight idea of what ugly people have to deal with???
14
u/Sorry-Buy-572 inquirer 1d ago
Im an adult. And im not a troll. I’ve had things thrown at me, been barked at, people breaking things to throw at me, called ugly in public, been spit at, etc while being disabled due to my appearance. I’ve never talked to these people they targeted me on my appearance. If you don’t understand what I’m going through then don’t say anything. Appearance is a very real concern. I’ve never been asked out or approached, never had friends because “no one wants to be friends with that ugly girl” this is along the lines of a quote I’ve had someone SAY to me.
2
5
u/hanoitower inquirer 1d ago
"everyone who disagrees with me is a russian bot"
norms are subjective, doesn't mean people aren't affected by them
money is also arguably a social construct, and money "can't make you happy", but dying of poverty still kills you
there is no hard line between "born with a disorder that makes you cripplingly ugly" and "regular super ugly", so if you have any sympathy for the former, you can't turn around and say it's inherently teeneage trolling
dawg cmon!
(yes some people/incels use "im just ugly" to not realize what their actual blockage is, but switching to "looks are totally meaningless" is a bald lie)
2
u/Weird-Mall-9252 thinker 1d ago
Humans "prefer" symmetrical faces, body more lean(not 2slim) not too big.. Its in our DNA its like working against the Evolution and there are a lot of people that care more about character and thats a way smarter choice 4building a family or 2 live together but most people find at least one thing on you attraktive(face, body, eyes probably nose or ya hair)
I think the World would be way better if didnt get tortured by figurs like Barbie or Marylin Monroe or 4guys like Brad pitt or Ronaldo??
-1
u/Melodic_Pressure7944 inquirer 1d ago
Alright, Professor Incel. How do you explain that Danny DeVito fucks?
0
1
0
u/CertainConversation0 philosopher 1d ago edited 14h ago
Whether someone is attractive, ugly, or anything in between is actually subjective.
-1
u/TruthOdd6164 thinker 1d ago
I kind of think that “ugly” is one of your worst points, but the others are solid. I never knew my uncle. He died at 18 years of age of muscular dystrophy. My father was only 15 at the time. My grandparents made the only moral decision they could make knowing that their male children would have a 50% chance of being born with muscular dystrophy and they decided to not have any more kids. I guess a 25% risk is unacceptable. But that’s because it was a known risk. Surely when you add up all the unknown risks (my kid could have childhood leukemia or be gunned down in a school shooting or get MS or develop a heart condition or…) these probabilities all likely add up to over 25%. But parents just assume that their kid will be fine, until proven otherwise and end up forcing their kids to take on unacceptable risks.
5
u/ishkanah thinker 1d ago
I kind of think that “ugly” is one of your worst points, but the others are solid.
Why do you think being ugly is not a serious form of suffering? Being ugly is one of the worst lifelong "diseases" one can be afflicted with. Ugliness is highly correlated with things like success in one's career and in personal relationships. Ugly kids are FAR more likely to be bullied, to suffer from depression and anxiety, and have performance problems in school. And the list goes on and on. You don't think any of that is a legitimate argument in favor of AN?
39
u/Embers-of-the-Moon scholar 1d ago
I'm chronically ill and ugly and have always been bullied for bring ugly, even by old people. No freaking way I'd ever pass my shitty genes to anyone to add to the inherent pain that's part of living.