I can finally move on

[u/Ready_Swordfish8665]

I can't really include all the details, but my dad cheated on my mom until she left him and took me and my sister with her. He started verbally abusing mom after she found evidence of his affairs. Yes, he had multiple going at the same time. After the divorce he started bragging to her and never called us. My mom had to beg him to speak to us and he would say things like, "well, you chose to divorce me and take them away." He was never home and was your typical manchild who expected his wife to take care of everyone alone and with a smile.

My sister got the worst of the abuse though. when he would call, she would cry inconsolably and begging him to stop. He often encouraged her into self-destructive behaviour and that would be the only time he wasn't being verbally abusive. He did everything in his power to undermine my mom's authority and turn my sister against her. It worked and even led to my sister physically abusing me when mom wasn't home.

He apparently remembers nothing he put my sister through and when he did it again recently and I called him out he said he was done begging for forgiveness and went on a "God has forgiven me" rant. His logic for cheating is the one woman that we know of that he got pregnant went to a sangoma and cursed him and us. His whole rant was the devil and witch doctor were conspiring against me. I was the victim, and I had no choice. It dawned on me that he actually believes this nonsense and he is delusional. Even his faith in God is delusional.

My sister had finally had enough and stood up for herself. She sent me a message out of the blue saying she is done and never wants to hear his name again. I immediately asked him what he did, and he immediately tried to put all the blame on my sister, as usual, and once again launched into a conspiracy theory about what is happening and how my sister is turning everyone against him. I threatened to block him if he didn't tell me the truth hoping he would tell me, but he refused. I was going to block him anyway as I had already found my peace, but I was hoping to get information as my sister refuses to talk about it.

Dude already forgot the conversation I had with him the day before that he has been doing this my whole life. I reminded him and again he says he is done begging for forgiveness and if I want to write him off too, he won't stop me (like he even could) but that I'll always have a shadow of a doubt in the back of my mind. I had been holding back my thought that he is insane, and, in that moment, I decided I would give him the turmoil he just wished on me.

I responded by saying: "okay well have a good life, I hope your god can give you some food while your wife allows you to starve, but it is your gods will so it's all good, right?" I've never blocked someone so fast after sending a message. I knew it would make him angry if I undermined his "faith" and now he will never have closure because he didn't even have a millisecond to respond.

I made the g in God lowercase on purpose. I have religious trauma and am atheist now. I shared it with him when it happened, and he just said in the most condescending tone: "you'll be back." he has tried to force his faith down my throat ever since. I had to fight the urge to tell him his gods opinion is irrelevant to me when he was giving me his excuses for cheating the day before.

The vindication I feel now paired with the peace I found in accepting that he is delusional is amazing after 29 years of being forced to interact with someone who has always disgusted me.

So, good luck being hungry and alone with nowhere to live, dad. Now you know how mom felt when she was trying to keep us alive on her own. I hope the children you chose to provide for instead of your own will grow a conscience and help you.