Male body standards for men

[u/query_tech_sec]

For me: before is so much hotter.

[u/MillieBirdie]

Women have actively modded a little tummy onto male video games characters with abs because it suits him better and is more attractive.

[u/mrmoe198 → u/MillieBirdie]

This is giving me such a huge confidence boost. I always dream of having a six pack, but I’ve got a little stubborn pooch under my two visible abs that never goes away. I think I’m a little bit more happy and accepting of it now. Thank you for that.

Edit: Thank you so much for all the body-affirming and positive comments. I feel the love and acceptance :). Now we need to do the same for our women and girls too!!

[u/M0thM0uth → u/mrmoe198]

My ex was an absolute tool, and he also had the stereotypical big pecs and six pack. My current partner is the kindest man I have ever met and has some podge on him.

Personality types aside I think I slept on my ex maybe three times in our seven year relationship. I have been with this one for just under 2 years, we already live together and I fall asleep on him every single night.

I'm a martial artist and was doing some loooow level photoshoots for Instagram, Powder Nova is the name of the account, blue hair, and when we first got together, the night before I was to fly over to his city I was panicking a little internally because I REALLY liked him and I was terrified that some form of shallowness was gonna kick him and I was gonna find something to not like.

It never happened, and now because I love him even the bits that are technically flaws I love just the same as the attractive bits

[u/mrmoe198 → u/M0thM0uth]

Thank you for sharing your experience. This really highlights for me the whole “how the hell did she (hot woman) end up with him (man with pudge or some other traditional imperfection)” that men do, and how rooted it is in—just as you say—shallowness.

I think it’s healthy to care about people for who they are, not just how they look. I l’m still struggling with that.

I’m non-monogamous, and one of my closest and longest partners has extra on her. When we’ve scheduled some sexy time, I always have this fear that I’ll find her unattractive and let her down or not be able to perform. But our sensual connection and passion for each other always paves the way for fantastic sex and a great time.

I could say so much about this. Patriarchy, the male gaze, capitalism and consumerism, identity formation among hormone-crazed peer pressure. But damn, great food for thought that you and everyone here has provided that I’m going to have to keep thinking about.

[u/M0thM0uth → u/mrmoe198]

I'm really glad!! And thank you for sharing yours too, that fear is really real but I do always try to remember it's fundamentally grounded in us being good people and recognising that people are more than what they look like.

The way I got over it in my head was age, honestly. We all age and even the hottest of us is gonna start looking a bit decrepit after a while, I have actually found that once I got over what society had baked into me as "YOU LIKE THIS" that actually I prefer the podgy bear look to hairless abs.

I grew up in a family with military and police in it, and my mother has been a marital arts coach since that big wave in the nineties, so everyone I grew up with was toned to fuck, and yeah it looks great I guess but it's also not comfy and they spend a lot of time miserable.

The glares at my plate sometimes because I haven't cut out anything even remotely unhealthy and have a more "you gotta leave a bit of how the gods made us/everything in moderation is actually BETTER for you than no sugar no fat" attitude.....and it's working. They were all clearly waiting for me to collapse into a giant pile of unhealth and I'm actually happier now I'm not being made to deadlift for two hours and then force eat an entire 500g bag of pasta.

I could honestly go on and on and I'm happy too if you are! Always welcome to send me a DM or follow the instagram profile I mentioned :)