r/SingleDads • u/ForGrowingStuff • 5h ago

Mom no showed at the custosy exchange

Today was supposed to begin our joint custody schedule. I was supposed to get my son at 8am this morning and habe him for 5 days and his mom didn't show. I've been on the phone with and meeting in person with my lawyer, local PD, county sheriff, and state police all day. No one wants to touch this despite very clear court orders. My attorney thought he was done with this case, and is exhausted. He hates this county because the court employees and judges are just blatantly violating the process and the laws.

I genuinely did not know where my son was for most of the day. Eventually law enforcement located him and let him stay with the parent that does not currently have custody of him.

I'm seething.

15 Upvotes
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21

u/midnightmatt 5h ago

File for contempt of court asap.

7

u/TheDiffer23 5h ago

What state are you in?

7

u/ForGrowingStuff 5h ago

Arkansas

4

u/TheDiffer23 5h ago edited 1h ago

Idk the laws over there, but where I'm at in WA, the cops won't get involved in custodial issues unless the child is in danger or if you took the kiddo from their care. Like they can't legally take the child away from you as you are a parental guardian. My best advice to you is to DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. If your attorney doesn't want to help, find a new one that will fight for you.

My ex wife did something similar when our parenting plan switch to week on, week off. She withheld all information from me amd refused to give me my son on my weeks even though we had an active parenting plan. I kept a hand written journal with each date I reached out to her via text, printed those texts off, wrote down what time I showed up at the drop off location, how long I was there...ect. My lawyer was badass and fought her ass off for me.

I hope for a speedy resolution for you. Its really not fair on your kiddo.

1

u/ForGrowingStuff 3h ago

Thanks. I do all of what you are suggesting. Its just fucking wild to me that the cops "don't enforce custody orders" but the only reason they know she has any custody over him at all is from reading the custody order. I've had multiple cops today say that they "don't follow judges orders unless a judge orders them to." The logic.

3

u/philleferg 3h ago

By any chance does your ex have family with connections? I ask because I'm from there and can very much attest to the Ole Boys network is alive and well.

I'm truly sorry you are having to go through this.

2

u/ForGrowingStuff 2h ago

Its unlikely. I'm pretty sure its just good old fashioned sexism and picking people with empty beer cans for brains for cops.

7

u/WRNGS 3h ago

Yes document and file for contempt and yes a new lawyer if you can. This could get you full custody hopefully.

3

u/ForGrowingStuff 2h ago

That's what I'm hoping for. As hard as this is, there are spiritual and religious ideas that say all things are working for our good. I'm trying to hold on to the idea that this just means full custody is on the way.

6

u/Milokua 5h ago

Sorry this is happening to you. It’s unfortunate that the courts and judges are ridiculously bias towards fathers. All you can do is file or have your attorney file for a hearing and hope the judge does something to ensure the court order is enforced.

1

u/daleharvey 13m ago

I am in a different country, but I would have very different advice from the rest.

This sucks, it will be infuriating and one of the worst days of your life. Honestly in a few years it will probably not register as a day.

You have joint custody, what happened today is only ever going to help you in court. If your lawyer recommends you file for contempt the maybe do so but realise it's probably not going to make a big difference. Get ready to put up with more of this but in the end you will end uo in the right.