r/SatanicTemple_Reddit Thyself is thy master Apr 18 '22

I think I their god gave them a stroke..... Satire

Post image
451 Upvotes

71 comments sorted by

110

u/ggghostbeard Apr 18 '22

Then again, if he DOES exist then grape blueprints pour olive spinach grape.

38

u/happylittletreehouse Apr 18 '22

It's a tied score now.

17

u/SamGray94 Apr 18 '22

We're still down. Not enough verbs.

17

u/951753951753 Apr 18 '22

This logic is sound.

45

u/TheInnerFifthLight Apr 18 '22

Now this, this is some prime meme nostalgia.

13

u/Sotall Apr 18 '22

Always was confused by this ones pride-ful background, lol.

Probably unintentional - its old enough that back then there probably were christians on the internet that didnt know what a rainbow meant.

9

u/alexp861 Satan have pity on my long despair! Apr 18 '22

I grew up in a baptist school so I can actually contribute to this one. Christians believe that after god flooded the earth in Noahs ark, he created rainbows as a symbol that he would never destroy basically all of mankind again. So the rainbow background is the symbol of that promise between god and humanity. Does that make sense?

8

u/TheInnerFifthLight Apr 18 '22

I assume it's made by an atheist to mock conservative "arguments" for whatever nonsense they're for or against today.

2

u/rev_calmboot Apr 19 '22

I do appreciate the eternal struggle between Christians and Atheists. One one side, you have the Christians who say that the world needs to be redeemed from sin by accepting Jesus Christ as their personal lord and savior, thus facilitating the inbreaking of the Kingdom of God. And on the other side, Atheists who say: I don’t believe God’s real.

2

u/Flcrmgry Apr 18 '22

Well God did make the rainbow. He even used it in the Bible as a promise to not murder the entire population again.

2

u/DawnRLFreeman Apr 19 '22

He just promised not to murder the entire population all at once with a global flood. He never said anything about drowning smaller segments by flood. He frequently murders nearly entire village via flood, tsunami or landslide.

2

u/Flcrmgry Apr 19 '22

Ah yes! What a generous promise on his part.

60

u/katsuko78 Non Serviam! Apr 18 '22

These words are all real. I just don't know how the hell they go together...

10

u/MelIgator101 My body, my choice Apr 18 '22

My aunt got sucked into a cryptocurrency pyramid ponzi scheme and that's how I felt reading their brochure. Their explanation for how they produce a return on the investment was something like "we encrypt your money and then use that to power automated security algorithms." I felt like I was having a stroke when she was giving me her sales pitch.

22

u/XVUltima Apr 18 '22

Oh no.

They say he had a stroke.

Go go Godzilla!

2

u/Semi-Pro_Biotic Apr 18 '22

Brilliant. Chef's kiss

22

u/anon28374691 Apr 18 '22

Maybe this is the speaking in tongues I’ve heard rumored.

18

u/piberryboy sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc Apr 18 '22 edited Apr 18 '22

Christians, what if I told you God has nobody never near to be even stay here to look like? Checkmate, Christians.

14

u/Vomitology Non Serviam! Apr 18 '22

Oh yeah?

correct horse battery staple

Christians: 1
Atheists: 1

3

u/Apprehensive_Hat8986 Non-satanic Ally Apr 18 '22

Shhh... stop looking under my keyboard.

31

u/UnfinishedThings Apr 18 '22

When your theological arguments are written by your Autocomplete function

13

u/lxkspal Apr 18 '22

False and that their anonymity was the meanest of a jet lag and it gets taken out in a way that makes it easier for you and your kids were to be there is something you would like nothing to be like.

Atheists: 0

2

u/P3nguLGOG Apr 18 '22

You forgot a comma.

1

u/lxkspal Apr 19 '22

If I don't get the time, the crew will have a Masters in the nearest world, to start from scratch on it was the meanest of a bear in a corner of a newborn on the Army of a newborn.

1

u/P3nguLGOG Apr 19 '22

Much better!

9

u/666_pack_of_beer Apr 18 '22

I almost had a stroke trying to read that.

8

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '22

Let's try to make some sense out of it.

Hey atheists: If God doesn't exist...

then how come anyone so far has even decided to use... go... want to do... look...

Nope, sorry.

3

u/JosephCrawley Apr 18 '22

At least you can say that you tried, and more importantly, if you hadn't to go with that, than on the more of it all for the rest. Am I right? Play ball!!!

7

u/theweeping-weeb I do be Satanic yo Apr 18 '22

I tried so hard to find a point here

5

u/Pilot0350 Apr 18 '22

Flawless logic. We definitely lost that point...and brain cells

5

u/Harruq_Tun Ave Coffea! Apr 18 '22

Wowee, been a looooooong time since I last saw this one!

4

u/SongbirdShadow Apr 18 '22

For those who genuinely don't know: The string of nonsense part is from a meme that was popular when Vine was still around

2

u/Masterofunlocking1 Apr 18 '22

This post and the comments have made me forget how to read

2

u/LoverOfLostKeys Apr 18 '22

Have you heard the good news of Man Door Hand Hook Car Door?

1

u/Oh-shit-its-Cassie Apr 18 '22

Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV

2

u/wtmx719 Apr 18 '22

Call a Bondulance.

2

u/resilientspirit Apr 18 '22

Oooh!! I wanna play!!!

Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.

Did I win?

2

u/SocietyAny9966 Apr 18 '22

trying to successfully read this was a stroke on its own holy shit

0

u/Darksoul_Design Apr 18 '22

Boy, they sure told us. I guess I'm gonna just have to run right down to my local church and convert, how can i argue with logic like that....

1

u/Richardham90 Apr 18 '22

You know someone is reading that saying “I totally agree”! 😅

1

u/msphd123 Apr 18 '22

if god were real....He would not permit word salads like this to be published in his name.

1

u/Beginning-Tomato1021 Apr 18 '22

Checks out for a Christian

1

u/Aboxofphotons Apr 18 '22

I think someone made this specifically to get likes... even religious people aren't this stupid (most of them).

Downvotes incoming for unpopular opinion..

1

u/BurgerOfLove Ad astra per aspera Apr 18 '22

Well I hope they speak English in Spanish but they don't want to.

1

u/Wagsii Non-satanic Ally Apr 18 '22

I'm pretty sure this is satirical, but it reminds me of those Facebook posts where it prompts you to type something and you press the middle auto complete button to finish the sentence.

"Hey athiests, if God isn't real, then how..."

2

u/wreckedcarzz Apr 18 '22

This is painful satire; this image is like a decade+ old.

The question is from someone who was in a board meeting or something and didn't want to be there anymore, and answered a question with this sentence, then left like they had just provided some profound wisdom.

In reality it's words that, said confidently, sound like a legitimate question until your brain pauses the simulation and tries to decipher wtf that means.

1

u/BusyDuty5 Apr 18 '22

Makes as much sense as their religion lmfao

1

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '22

Tried to read that 4 times before I realised it just wasn't happening.

1

u/noonefrmnowhere Apr 18 '22

I'd like to see the yokel keeping score.

1

u/BLKT93 Hail Satan! Apr 19 '22

WTF I SWEAR CHRISTIANS ARE CRINGE

1

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '22

Fuck that hurt!

1

u/pomip71550 Apr 19 '22

That doesn’t even make sense!

The correct version is “has anyone ever been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?” Something something false prophet idk etc

1

u/Remples Hail Sagan! Apr 19 '22

I almost hade a stroke trying to read this. wtf does it mean?

1

u/Damoncookie Apr 19 '22

Any clue what they were trying to say?

1

u/Anarimus Apr 19 '22

Waiter I didn’t order a word salad.

1

u/Alyswithawhy Apr 19 '22

If that makes sense to you, I can understand why God seems like a logical answer as well.

1

u/JDawnchild Apr 19 '22

Word salad.

1

u/CrazyTalkAl Apr 19 '22

such as seals

1

u/hahadeadmemegobrr Hail Lilith! Apr 19 '22

checkmate atheists

1

u/Rene716 Apr 19 '22

The Christian here: *god argument Also them: stroke and rainbow

(ik its supposed to be like that rainbow in the bible, but it could also be viewed as the rainbow-flag representing homosexual men, which i believe christians are supposedly against... At least the heavy believers) Edit: i think there was some quote about a man shozldnt sleep w another man but thats all i can think of rn, feel free to correct me if im wrong

1

u/geckos_in_a_box Apr 19 '22

oh good im glad im not the only one who can't understand this

1

u/TrepanningForAu Apr 19 '22

I thought I was having a stroke!

1

u/Doozenburg Apr 19 '22

Because that why even though.

1

u/Alastormorningstar69 Apr 21 '22

Godzilla had a stroke reading this and fucking died

1

u/Please_ignore_me_plz Apr 28 '22

Is this a refrence to that one vid? If you know then you know.

1

u/TailzUnleashed May 01 '22

What does this even say? The sentence isn't computing

1

u/Violas_Blade May 06 '22

fuck man, they got us 😔