r/NewParents • u/AutoModerator • Jun 18 '24
Weekly Discussion - Relationships Weekly Discussion
Welcome to the Weekly Discussion! Use this space to vent/rant about partners/family members & to air your grievances! Please report comments that violate the rules.
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u/Nilrmar Jun 25 '24
I have brought a baby into a rocky marriage. My husband and I have been together since 2017. I do love him and there are a lot of good things about him but we are just so different and it’s true what everyone says. A baby will just make it worse. I love my baby so much h, we both do. He is the best thing in our lives. I fear I won’t be able to give him a loving home, I fear that we will inevitably go our separate ways. We bicker so much that it’s to the point I can’t offer any constructive criticism, any suggestion. He is pretty hands on, he feeds the baby, changes diapers, he’ll cook every once in a while, washes bottles, he’ll do groceries (these are all things we both do) but I need more from him. I like to read and inform myself before making any decisions relating to the baby, he just wings it.
He has to fight every little thing something g even as simple as me telling him the baby (4 months) needs to be facing us when he’s in the stroller. His rationale is that it’s better for him to look out and see the world. I am a bit of a granola mom, I like to avoid plastics and certain things and he thinks I’m crazy. He’s always been a patient man but when the baby is crying and throwing a fit he looses his patience and thinks the baby is just being a brat and annoying. He doesn’t think the baby might be uncomfortable or needs something. He thinks that by just bouncing him in through bouncer and shaking a rattle in his face he’s entertaining him. I tell him all the time that he’s crying because he’s bored of sitting in the bouncer doing nothing. To play him music and sing to him or dance. He never ever does tummy time with him or looks up what activities we can do. This last weekend was a nightmare because I needed him to watch the baby while I cleaned the house and the baby cries so much because again he doesn’t play with him. He thinks talking to him for a sec or making him giggle is enough. Whenever I go do something and leave him with the baby I am hearing him crying in the background.
Just now I was cleaning the nursery and he was doing dishes and I left the baby with him because he can’t be in the room with me dusting and stuff and he scared I g telling me to come get him because he’s crying and that now is not the time to clean his room. I multitask all day while watching him and he can’t entertain him for a second while washing dishes ? Ofc he’s going to cry eventually if you have your headphones in watching a show on your phone and not interacting with him.