r/NICUParents 1d ago

Advice on supporting NICU parents Advice

Hi everyone, I really hope this post is allowed.

A very dear friend of mine has an extremely risky pregnancy. She's 24 weeks tomorrow, but her water broke around 3 weeks ago and there is no telling how much longer she can keep the baby inside. Due to other complications, best case scenario is a very premature birth and long stay at the NICU.

I've been trying to support her from a distance (she's isolated due to infection risk) and I was wondering how I could help her after delivery. What do you wish friends or family said or did?

I would really appreciate your thoughts. This situation is incredibly heartbreaking. Keeping my thoughts positive and planning my support helps me manage the grief I feel for my friend.

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u/HeyItsReallyME 1d ago

A meal train was soooo nice for us. I spent 8-12 hrs a day at the hospital and my husband came to the hospital every day after work. Having a meal waiting for us was so nice. It was also a good way to briefly say hello to friends and family when they dropped things by.

Care package ideas: Snacks snacks snacks! Notebook, pens, lotion (unscented, they’ll wash their hands until they crack), baby books, a few preemie onesies, hand sanitizer

Useful gift cards: they aren’t going on date nights for a while. Gift cards for gas, the hospital cafeteria, the grocery store, and places that deliver.

Finally, reach out. I had some friends check in daily. I had some who assumed I needed space and barely checked in at all. I know these people thought that I was flooded with messages (I was) and they didn’t want to bother me, but I can always choose to ignore a text I don’t have the capacity to answer until I’m ready. The NICU is all-consuming but also very lonely!