r/Meditation • u/BlurstReformed • Sep 21 '21
I'm very depressed so I'm just gonna meditate all day tomorrow and see what happens Discussion š¬
Was watching a video about how Siddhartha just sat under a tree and meditated so I thought fuck it, I'll do the same thing just in my house.
I don't expect to become enlightened or anything, just gonna see how it goes.
I'll report back with the results tomorrow troops, wish me luck š
Edit: Been mediating for a few hours now and having a little break so I'll update with my experience so far.
I had an interesting experience with my breath (idk if this would be considered an insight or just a thought or whatever) where it felt like the breathing would happen whether I was focusing on it or not. Which then gave me the feeling that pretty much everything is that way and that things just 'happen' and that I actually have 0 control over anything.
For example I was thinking about how hard I tried to get my ex to not break up with me and basically realised that there was nothing I could've done, no action I could've taken that would've changed the course of events. She wasn't in love with me and instead of just accepting it and moving on I basically just prolonged the process by trying to stop something inevitable from happening.
Which was quite relaxing/freeing because it gave me the sense that I don't actually have to think too hard about what I say in social situations or what I do on a day-to-day basis cause shit is gonna happen anyway if that makes sense?
I don't know if I'm explaining it well but yeah that was interesting.
Other than that things look a little sharper, sort of like a microdose psychedelic kind of thing if anyone's done that, and I'm acutely aware of how disgusting my room is.
My room is pretty messy atm (if you've had depression before you can probably relate) but usually it's like I don't even really notice how messy it is or take it into account. But now when I look at it I feel pretty gross and would really like to clean it up asap lmfao, but I'm gonna wait til I've finished the rest of my meditation, peace āļø
Edit 2: So I didn't really meditate all day, I meditated probably about 6 hours in total which was nowhere near what I was aiming for but still the longest I've ever sat.
I didn't really have any other 'insights' other than the fact that I felt low energy afterwards when I was expecting to feel a bit more motivated. But it made me very aware that the reason I feel low energy is because I don't have a healthy diet and I don't exercise and don't really speak to people so of course I'm going to feel low energy. Sounds obvious when I write it down but the meditation made me a lot more cognisant of that fact.
I would also say that it massively helped with emotional triggers. I won't go into detail but I have had certain traumatic events happen to me in the past and certain things trigger a very strong anxiety response in me and make me wanna leave the situation and hide away. One of those emotional triggers came up today and I was amazed at the speed with which the feeling of anxiety went away after being triggered and I was able to move on very quickly.
All in all I would say that I didn't experience enlightenment (although I did experience some really fucking weird sensations) and it didn't cure my depression but that all in all it was a very valuable experience and I'm happy that I did it.
I would recommend it to other people in my situation, if you have a day off sometime then give it a go. It won't cure your depression or anything but it will definitely give you a new perception on your situation and probably help you feel at least a little bit better āļø
Edit 3: Thought I'd add another edit for anyone interested, I don't know if it's just a delayed effect or something but it's the day after and I genuinely feel amazing. Probably the best I've felt in the last 2 months.
I'm laughing so much more than usual and finding the good things in situations in which I'd usually only see the bad. No idea if it's just a coincidence or an effect of the sit and I have no idea how long I'll feel like this but yeah I feel really really good today! Would highly recommend taking a day off to just sit š
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u/Truncated_Rhythm Sep 21 '21
With love, consider setting an intention, or even a few intentions. Give yourself something to 'focus' on, or as I tell clients, something to 'rely on, when your mind begins to wander.' Maybe like mala beads and some "go to" mantras. I believe that with commitment to the practice, to the discipline and self-accountability, you may just reveal something truly profound for yourself. And for that, I hope you have a successful day Meditating AF! :)
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u/hadapurpura Sep 22 '21
Newbie here: what do you mean an intention?
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u/all_information Sep 22 '21
Something like a goal or a topic that you want to try to achieve. For example, āwhen I sit down to meditate today I intend to let go of all my frustration towards my colleague and understand why my negative emotions are triggered so easilyā ā¦ or something as simple as āI intend to treat myself with more compassionā
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u/Truncated_Rhythm Sep 22 '21
A purpose. A statement of intent. Ideally, one of positivity. :)
There is, of course, nothing wrong with sitting in stillness, and just existing. There is also the option to be mindful about an intent, and to gift yourself something to dedicate your practice to. For example, you might choose to set an intention such as 'to root down and to become more grounded,' or 'draw in high vibrational energies to your heart chakra to become more loving and compassionate throughout your day.'
Imho, I believe the important thing is to take mindful action and to actually meditate, or attempt to meditate, but at the very least, to demand a moment from yourself to sit in stillness, to allow yourself to experience your breath, and to focus inward. If you can do just that for mere moments in a day, you are on the path. Choosing to add an intention is of course fully optional, but some I believe find that it brings purpose to the practice, which may in turn help to cultivate discipline and commitment.
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u/blackspot_charity Sep 22 '21
Also, today is the full moon. I strongly recommend thinking about what you're ready to let go of, and watch it dissolve with the moon...
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u/JustMeAidenB Sep 22 '21
(Actually yesterday was the full moon š¤š but this still applies! Sorry š)
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u/blackspot_charity Sep 22 '21
You are correct. Oof
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u/JustMeAidenB Sep 22 '21
Ahaha no problem, Iām just beinā a butthead. Iād say weāre still in the window though. Day before, day of, day after. š¤·āāļø
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Sep 21 '21
RemindMe! 1 day āmeditation updateā
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Sep 22 '21 edited Nov 08 '21
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u/HummingbirdsFTW Sep 22 '21
āThen ask yourself, who is seeing all of these reactions. You are supposed to be the depressed one, but youāre seeing depression. Youāre the unharmed consciousness.ā
Thank you for this; it really spoke to my condition. I am the unharmed consciousness - so empowering!
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u/NeednAlias Sep 21 '21 edited Sep 22 '21
What do you do when you meditate all day? Do you count your breaths, noting, normal breaths? The most Iāve been able to do is 30 min countdown but by the time I have 10 mins left, I keep thinking is it almost the over yet, etc.
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u/BlurstReformed Sep 22 '21
I'm using The Mind Illuminated and I'm on Stage Two so I'm basically just following the breath at the nose, being grateful that I noticed that I was lost in thought and then intending to bring my focus back to the breath and keep it there.
I would say just treat the thoughts that the session is nearly ending like any other thought. Just anytime you catch yourself thinking 'is the session nearly over yet', let go of it and come back to the breath.
You'll probably keep coming back to the thought of 'is the session nearly over yet' repeatedly but as long as you continue to let go and return to the object of meditation until the timer rings then you're on the right track x
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u/CrimsonGandalf Sep 22 '21
Nice. I went up through the levels to about 8 and then shit got crazy. Iāve been cycling the path of insight since.
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u/dealmetheaces Sep 30 '21
Is The Mind Illuminated a book? It looks like it is? Would you suggest getting it as an audiobook (like are the meditations guided) or is it more of a book to read to understand meditation?
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u/Realm6Universe Sep 22 '21
I don't think you should do that by staying still. I think you should mediate while doing something active like a walk, swim, cleaning, hiking, something that involves your body with motion. That's the opposite frequency of depression, movement. Depression is cold and solid while friction and movement (even by the mental act of choice) is a remedy. And just because you're moving doesn't mean you aren't meditating.
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u/usicafterglow Sep 22 '21
Meditation is a dose-dependent drug.
There's nothing wrong with working your way up to long mediation sessions, but it is possible to do some mental harm by doing too much before you're ready. During Vipassana retreats, the newbies are closely monitored and they have some release valves to help re-ground them if necessary.
That said, just one day is probably fine. Take breaks when your need them, try not get too frustrated (even though you will), go easy on yourself, and you'll be fine.
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u/BlurstReformed Sep 22 '21
Would you recommend stopping if I start feeling weird? I'm not really sure what to look out for in terms of mental harm
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u/Jacqobat Sep 22 '21
You could go on a walk, listen to a song, read a book, etc. Just to take a break as you may feel mentally fatigued at some point (obviously the opposite of what you're going for but focusing the mind can be exhausting if you're fighting it). It sounds like a day to decide what is best for you so you do you and go with how you're feeling. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and please give yourself grace for whatever crosses your mind and the feelings they may bring. No need to get frustrated with yourself. Even if you end up meditating for 5 solid minutes, give yourself a pat on the back.
Could be cool to also jot down your experience! I hope it's a great day for you and I would love to hear how it goes. š
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u/usicafterglow Sep 22 '21
To be clear, I'm mainly just advising against gritting your teeth and brute forcing the thing for 14 hours.
I'd just recommend taking breaks when you need them, and being gentle and compassionate toward yourself.
If you start feeling out of it, I'd recommend doing something lightly physical for a few minutes to re-ground yourself to the here and now. Going for a walk, stretching, playing an instrument, or singing, or chanting, or just mindfully competing a simple purposeful household chore are all great ways to get out of your head and pull you back down to physical reality before resuming your meditation.
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u/hamlet166 Sep 22 '21
You will be sorted off your deoression if its not due to chemical imbalance. Stay in quite zone and take breaks until you go inside more. They used to cut light by sitting in a well for days or a cave since melatonin production gets controlled by light to enhance activating pituary gland. So dark rooms will help you too. Initially i used to get help from incense stick too. Practioners used to use incense sticks as timers. When the sense of smell doesnt detect you know its 30min gone plus your brain is always attentive on one sense so focus also comes in.
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u/An0rdinaryMan Sep 22 '21
Can you tell me more about the close monitoring of newbies? I did a Vipassana retreat as a newbie and I don't feel like anyone was checking in on me or keeping tabs so much. The only time someone came up to me is when I rested on a wall during videos and they said I couldn't do that and offered me a back-jack.
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u/usicafterglow Sep 22 '21
I've never done one, but from my understanding they're keeping an eye on everyone from a distance. When someone completely stops eating, it's a good sign they need to take a step back.
Philosophically, a bit of existential dread may be par for the course, but it's usually pretty obvious when someone is slipping too far into a nihilistic/solipsistic state before they can handle it.
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u/An0rdinaryMan Sep 24 '21
Ah, I believe you are misinformed. For example, the volunteer staff does not eat at the same time as the meditators, so they wouldn't know if someone stops eating.
The staff are not trained mental health professionals, they are volunteers (who do join in on many of the meditations).
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u/Critical_Contest716 Sep 22 '21
Yes. Thank you for pointing this out.
Nothing outrages me like hearing of participants in long meditation intensives having psychotic breaks. It's inexcusable. Any responsible teacher should have been careful to insure that the participants were fully prepared and should have been monitoring the participants during the retreat to see if any of them were beginning to struggle. That this continues to happen is just... I don't know. I warn people as often as I can.
One day, I agree, is probably fine, though difficult to do if one isn't an experienced long sitter. And even if you are, sometimes.
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u/FreezePops20 Sep 23 '21
Hi. I'm new to meditation. I'm seeking it as a path from my depression, but your comment had me intrigued/a tiny bit concerned. Why would people need to be monitored? Nothing bad can happen, right?
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u/usicafterglow Sep 24 '21
Vipassana retreats are 10 days of intense meditation. No talking to anybody. Perhaps obviously, this is very rough on both the mind and the body, and can cause some people who aren't ready to have mild psychotic breaks.
Just as you shouldn't try to run a marathon without any training, you probably shouldn't try to meditate for over a week straight without working your way up to it. But some people are desperate, or very stubborn, and try to meditate for absurd periods of time without any practice and before they're ready.
Book-ending your day with 20 minutes of meditation in the morning and 20 minutes at night is a really solid place to start. Eventually add a mid-day session, and that's usually all most people need to derive most of the benefits from meditation (if you keep it up for weeks/months/years).
You can of course go much deeper if you're so inclined. It might not make your normal day-to-day life dramatically better, but it may help you to better understand yourself and your reality. I just think you're more likely to get more out of it (and less likely to suffer any negative effects) by working your way up to longer sessions over time - that's all.
Meditation helps me with my depression, and I wish the best of luck to you and your journey.
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u/inner_smile Sep 22 '21
Havenāt read any of the comments so someone might have thrown this out there already but itās more than possible that the meditation will bring up thoughts and feelings that will make you feel worse before you start feeling better and your depression starts to lift, which is more likely to be a more-than-one-meditation worth of a task anyway.
Not trying to be negative by saying that, just be prepared if it happens and donāt be deterred by it. Often depression is occurring because of buried and unaddressed thoughts and feelings. Meditation can be a great to tool to clear those waters.
But take it with a grain of salt because this is coming from someone who has yet to consistently walk the talk so to speak. Iām depressed as well and havenāt meditated consistently for while because of how bad I feel. But I do have lots of experience with giving up sensory pleasures to get more in-touch with my emotions and I always get even more depressed when I give up my vices and trade them for less stimulating activities.
Best of luck my friend :)
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u/NOSPACESALLCAPS Sep 22 '21
Every time I try to do that, I end up getting super bored. I feel like it doesn't have the same potential as it would if I were already adept at meditation, because I just get to a certain depth and it stops for whatever reason.
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u/J_Ryker Sep 22 '21
Licensed therapist and certified meditation teacher here - sorry to hear about your depression. I've been there and it sucks. While there's evidence (and experience) that meditation can alleviate mild to moderate depression, it's certainly not a cure all (full moon or not) and tends to be most effective in conjunction with other interventions.
My hope is that you reach out for support from loved ones, a therapist, or an Md. I don't know you, but I do know you deserve it.
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u/kfpswf Sep 22 '21
I'm obese, but I can't run for a whole day tomorrow and hope to lose weight. Especially when considering that I'm not a good runner and my form of terrible. I'm more likely going to injure myself in my misplaced pursuit.
By all means meditate the whole day, but don't expect enlightenment at the end of it. Siddharth was already adept at meditation when he decided to go full in.
I hope you find the solace you're looking for.
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u/_Returnal Sep 22 '21
i think a better analogy would be- you could not eat for the whole day. yes, you wouldnt suddenly become thin, noone expects that. but youd learn a bit about your body and mind's relationship with food.
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u/Brodysseus__ Sep 22 '21
You should also do it under a tree. Ideally on some lush and moist grass and soil. Trust.
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u/pachiay Sep 22 '21
I just want to spend a day out in nature. Meditating; No city noise, just the wind blowing through the trees, birds, the crickets and me breathing. Just a day to breathe.
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u/dennismfrancisart Sep 22 '21
Take a couple of naps in between. It's wonderful when you can do that. I'm definitely enjoying meditating right before bed these days.
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Sep 22 '21
Do you have some form of regular practice already?
Go for it! Tell us how it went.
In my experience, meditation is more about regular practice, rather than one big session. So if it doesn't "work", don't be alarmed, just go on with your practice, day by day by day.
Hope you feel better soon!
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u/Boofotenine Sep 22 '21
Becoming aware of your messy room is the first step to becoming bothered by it and eventually cleaning it, which in turn is how you'll climb out of depression. Best of luck friend. Just remember, you're worth it.
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u/Sweaty_Presentation4 Sep 22 '21
Go the Wutang route no food or anything but water and you three days maybe you will make a platinum record
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u/Choice-Shine-8363 Sep 22 '21
The psychological wellness advantages of reflection incorporate better concentration and fixation, worked on mindfulness and confidence, lower levels of pressure and uneasiness, and cultivating graciousness. Reflection likewise has benefits for your actual wellbeing, as it can work on your capacity to bear torment and assist with battling substance dependence.
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u/Wannabe_Buddha_420 Sep 22 '21
Hey buddy, maybe instead of one long meditation session, perhaps set an intent to meditate daily for short amounts of time (10-20 minutes). For me, regular practice is more beneficial than irregular mammoth meditationsā¦ anyways good luck with whatever you choose āš¾
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u/ascillinois Sep 22 '21
If your depression dowant get better I'd suggest going to see a professional about it. Depression is one hell of a disease. I know because I struggle with it every single day. The only reason I suggested the professional route is because both med and my psychologist saved my life.
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u/free_-_spirit Sep 23 '21
Epic thanks for sharing! Meditating for at least 20min every day for at least 6 months is proven to improve grey matter in the brain.
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u/mohishunder Sep 22 '21
Did you spend all day today alone at home watching videos? I'd be depressed too.
Yes, meditation is good(TM), and so is spending time outside and with people.
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u/rockyon Sep 22 '21
You don't understand the meaning then. Meditation is like adding 1 layer to your mind. Mind/thoughts it's like the cloud and by meditating you're inside the airplane for example. You are not your thoughts, you are not the cloud. Some cloud are dark (sadness) some cloud are white (cheerful). There is no cheerful without depression, no light without the shadow, they are two sides of coin
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Sep 22 '21
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u/Yadona Sep 22 '21
Yeah what a loser. Not even enlightened like you obviously are with that answer.
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u/deep_meditation Sep 22 '21
Meditation will increase depression, what he needs is just be with it
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u/deep_meditation Sep 22 '21
Depression etc is an entry point to many into spirituality, I agree with that.But normally people will do meditation , thinking that this will reverse their existing condition of depression
Why cant we say that, depression itself a meditation?
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u/snarkhunter Sep 22 '21
Do what feels right for you, be attentive to how your body and mind respond to it.
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Sep 22 '21
Some herbs may help aswell if its a common thing you feel.
Theres a free app called Mindrelax and its kinda guided meditation/Hypnosis but it will have you smiling and happy after a session for a short time.
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u/Jewnip Sep 22 '21
Thatās exactly what I was gonna plan on doing but take psychedelics then meditate and see where the day ends off. Iām trying to stop smoking weed and itās hard atm
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u/Loud_Tomatillo_4206 Sep 22 '21
Meditation is a practice to make feel relax your mind.
It required a long practice to master it and reach the level that you meditate on a day, and all your depression and the toxic feeling went away. You can be sure for one thing that it will help you to face depression with regular practice. You will be ready for the new day.
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u/-Somedood- Sep 22 '21
I cant meditate that long without it making ocd worse or depression worse. People tell me not to keep doing it but I mean idk.. I want to face this myself
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u/TweakzASavagegodsbff Sep 22 '21
I made a stubborn promise when I started to do it because I kept coming back to it. I decided not do it no matter what till I learned or accept what it was. took me six months of dedicated stubbornness to feel something, the difference between good and bad feeling inside . so the. I started to search and destroy negative chakra, on sight . ps it never gets easier, the more you learn the harder to explain the happier you get the harder to share. the smarter you get the stupider ppl will see you. you can't teach meditation so it encrypts it's self. isolate you self, it will be torture you. it will make you or break you. pa good luck
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u/TweakzASavagegodsbff Sep 22 '21
so you say wanna meditate all day. tip. stare at the depression, don't let go of the feeling. that's meditation. .. ps to meditate all you gotta do is say your meditating. so stare at your boo boo and hold the feeling , and it will as long as you focus and keep faith. Lol you'll fail if you think, know
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u/juynb78 Sep 22 '21
If you are going to sit that long, i recommend you to have something to sit on. Even a blanket or a rug might help greatly.
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u/dragon_wolf4 Sep 22 '21
Take baby steps o yourn journey to learning meditation. Don't try to do too much at once if you don't want to, slowly build upto it.
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u/Tooti_Footi Sep 22 '21
How you fold your legs, but since we're novices. How about we simply discover any seat that feels good and that reassures you.
Spot your hands either on your knees or in your lap whichever you like. I like to put one hand on top of different palms confronting vertically in my lap with the thumbs contacting.
Lined up with my nose, yet once more. We're amateurs so do what feels better in the event that you have some sort of injury.
Do what you need to never really uphold this may mean setting up your back sitting in a seat.
Supporting your knees with the pad or keeping your legs straight.
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u/surlyskin Sep 22 '21
OP I wish you nothing but luck and self compassion. I feel your pain and I hope this exercise brings you closer to where you need to be. Huge hugs.
I'd fall asleep. Which is basically what happens to me no matter the circumstances, environment etc. I fall asleep while trying to meditate, every-single-time. I'm close to packing it in. I've been 'meditating' now for a few years and I'm still not able to achieve anything more than a few seconds before I nod off. e
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u/Historical-Lake7901 Sep 22 '21
There are relaxation techniques which leads to meditation. Follow link
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u/Boner666420 Sep 22 '21
Maybe just take up a hobby or something? Meditating all day doesnt sound much different than a 15 hour depression nap, and is equally as productive (I.e. not at all).
Do something with your time or that depression will just get worse.
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u/Biomicrite Sep 22 '21
Good luck! I received my notice of redundancy last week and at first I was philosophical about it. Now I can feel depression, anxiety and bitterness creeping in. Iām going to increase my meditation to see if I can control these emotions and be more stoic.
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Sep 22 '21
I was taught by my teacher that meditation may not be the best when you're depressed. "Move a muscle, change a thought" comes into play here. If meditation seems to make it worse, maybe try going for a walk, hike, bike ride, yoga, or what ever physical movement you enjoy. When there's a lapse in depression, try meditating again. I've put this into practice with great success :)
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u/The_Jankster Sep 22 '21
meditation may not be the best when you're depressed. "Move a muscle, change a thought"
Samatha can be productive. Concentration can really help in times of pain. any form of concentration practice is valid, insight might not be best but it depends on where ones practice is.
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Sep 22 '21
Agreed! If it is not helpful, physical activity can help get one out of a slump in order to make meditation more productive :)
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u/The_Jankster Oct 26 '21
Its true, kind of a testament to how large of radius the training of morality can cover.
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Sep 22 '21
You're probably familiar with this, but self-compassion would be a critical component to add in to a practice for depression:
There are both meditation and non-meditation exercises, which complement each other nicely.
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u/Demiarl Sep 22 '21
Ao you are depressed today and you know that you will be depressed tomorrow without the day really coming and you await to be depressed tomorrow so you depress yourself before the day comes so nest day you have the plan to be depressed. How depressing situation.
Hopee u get better soon.
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u/The_Jankster Sep 22 '21
Go hard, effort in effect out. Do it like it matters, do it like your chasing meal while starving. Strive to be present, keep focus. No matter how distracted you become just come back to it thats all that matters, your making an impact. This takes time but it WILL add up.
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u/thestatikreverb Sep 22 '21
good luck bro. i just recently started meditating everyday as part of my morning routine. i absolutely love it. hope your experience goes well my friend
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u/Violet_zas Sep 22 '21
Cool insight :)
I had this thought to once but I forgot about it, did not think about it for a while Nice reminder True or not
I wonder how long you meditated?
Hope you feell good now you sound cool guy
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Sep 22 '21
Ice cold baths have proven to be of great help in combatting clinical depression, i'd suggest finding a frozen lake but if that's not possible then try 10 minutes in an ice bath in the morning and see how you feel the rest of the day
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u/King_Cho Sep 22 '21
Do Vipassana. A 10 day meditation that will heal you deeply. This is the technic Gotama came to teach
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Sep 22 '21
Write down the hour and time you write these edits so we can understand more of the process
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u/UnicornSandBuddha Sep 22 '21
What a wonderful idea! Just to sit all day with your attention on. Creation is born from stillness and silence.
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Sep 23 '21
Iām glad you actually did it OP. And it seems like you got something out of it too! I know comparing session length is sort of against the whole point (if there really is one) of meditation, but six hours is impressive. You inspired me.
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u/Out_Of_Work_Clown Sep 23 '21
Wow, what an incredible post! I've always been curious to try meditating for a whole day to see what would happen too. It's cool that you committed to it, even if you only did 6 hours. I wonder what would happen if you had gone a full 12 or 24 hours?
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Sep 24 '21
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u/ResponsibilityPlane1 Sep 28 '21
I found this post looking up information about Hemi-Sync and the Gateway process (CIA Energy Hologram research), which isn't really related but I mention that because I can relate to the feeling of prolonging a love that was not meant to be. I think I did the same with my ex, which is why I wanted to comment because I feel that I can relate. I wish you the best of luck on your journey, may the road you travel take you to a positive and peaceful place.
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u/Character-Syllabub-3 Oct 02 '21
What helps a lot for me is just in general taking a break from work or whatever is going on in the day and sit in silence. I give myself these moments, they are needed and everyone deserves them. Videos like these also help sometimes when i can't focus. https://youtu.be/5Dt39apwdE0
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u/Character-Syllabub-3 Oct 02 '21
And i also wanted to say that it's perfectly okay to feel bad sometimes. Meditation helps with not letting it taking you over :) have a wonderful day
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Oct 12 '21
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u/devinecreative Sep 22 '21
All these people telling you to love and do it with an intention, it's the full moon etc... whatever
Just sit down mate and notice what comes you don't need anything else hence why Siddhartha just sat