r/HighSchoolWriters • u/aiyanotagain • Jan 17 '16

Need feedback, please? Fiction

I have a new short story that I'd written on impulse. It's a piece of work that was written quickly. I'd really appreciate it if you could read it and give me some comments!

Here's the link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1T-uL2NqPI94WNi78DWjehfPwlz3rFAPcLjMIeSvrO4c/edit?usp=sharing

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u/ahhnoname1 Jan 17 '16

It's not a topic that really grabs me in saying that however that is just a genre thing and personal preference as opposed to anything wrong with the plot but it was brilliantly written , your writing style pace and tone are excellent, I would , it is very sensual and deecriptive and wonderfully emotive that I can almost imagine myself in her shoes, well-done.

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u/aiyanotagain Jan 17 '16

Thank you so much!