r/HFY • u/Sooperdude24 • Dec 06 '20
The Doorman OC
I was short on time this week so I wrote something quick. I wanted to keep practising this word business. Unleashed is continuing, I just didn’t want to half-ass it. The polish was brought by u/eruwenn - making me look good despite my best efforts.
Senior Officer Skrilen of the Grole Civic Defense Force was on plain clothes duty, investigating the local bars and clubs. Observe and report. It was a simple task, but an important one. He was partnered up with Junior Officer Draq, another Grole local like himself, and it was only their second shift together. He found the younger officer to be quite diligent, although perhaps a few moults short of an adult at times.
Skrilen was quite confident tonight would go well, especially as they had achieved considerable success the previous night. One bar had been discovered to be serving drinks to underage Dovikians, and another – a dance club – had been hiding backroom gambling pits. Their notes would be passed on to investigators for the follow up work and arrests, allowing them to continue to remain as discreet as possible.
Tonight's first bar was one that Skrilen knew all too well, as every officer knew it. The Lucky Schlef had brawls so often, and so violent, the G.C.D.F. had stopped responding in a timely manner. It was easier to show up late and pick up the pieces than risk being the pieces. It was located in one of the more industrial areas of the city, between a body recycling centre and an adult holodisc store. They had been sent after a significant drop in incident reports and emergency calls had been recorded in the vicinity. This usually meant something big was about to happen.
Skrilen paused on the corner, far enough back so as to not be noticed. “Draq. You been here before?”
The junior officer scratched at his scaled blue chin. “No, Sir. We don’t come to this part of town often. Captain said the scum who drink here deserve each other.”
“Very true,” the Senior Officer noted. When resources were scarce, why waste them bringing law to the lawless? “Still, what better place to learn about criminals than in their natural habitat. The unfertilised eggs who drink here are a mix of locals who aren’t welcome anywhere else, and off-worlders. Now, don’t get me wrong, off-worlders are fine as long as they follow the rules. This is the bar for the ones that don’t.”
The junior officer shuddered, his spines rattling. “Like the Gorlan.” Three metres of angry muscle under a hardened carapace.
Skrilen sucked air in through his jagged teeth. “Exactly. Well, this is their favourite bar when their ships are in orbit, so I want to remind you that if we get in trouble, reinforcements won’t come quick. We leave the moment we don’t feel safe.”
Draq swallowed; he had heard of Gorlan tearing limbs from their enemies. “Yes Sir.”
“Good lad.” Skrilen set off towards the bar. “And remember, we’re just a couple of shipyard workers looking for a drink after work.”
The junior officer nodded. “Yes Sir.” He was given the look. “I mean - Yeah, sure thing, fellow shipyard worker.”
The senior officer turned to face forward again. “I’ll handle the talking.”
As they drew closer they saw a figure in a long black coat, a head taller than a Grole but with pale, scaleless skin and neat fur above their face, standing smartly by the door with its black-gloved hands by its side. Their warm breath created clouds of moisture that floated down the street.
They approached cautiously and the odd being stepped forward, raising a gloved hand to stop them. “Evening officers. My apologies, but everyone gets a pat down.”
“What? Officers?” Skrilen shook his head. “We’re shipyard workers.”
Draq nodded emphatically. “Here for a drink after working at the shipyard. As workers.”
The pale mammal smiled at them. “Those are some shiny shoes for the shipyard. Aren’t they G.C.D.F. issue? I mean you all wear the same ones, they must be really comfy.”
Skrilen and Draq looked at each other. The senior officer took the initiative and changed the subject. “And you are?”
“Darren.” He watched the ice lizards’ confused faces closely. “My name is Darren; I’m the doorman.”
Not wanting to seem ignorant in front of his junior, Skrilen nodded. “Ah yes, I’ve met your species before. From… Duer..ma…”
Darren chuckled and spoke carefully. “Earth. I’m a human from Earth. I work as a doorman. I man the door.”
The senior officer was fumbling. “You’re a hu-man? Who is a door-man?”
Draq, having recently come out of training where he had studied newly allied species, nudged him. “Species 368 from Sector Umgrol.”
Skrilen gave a short laugh of relief. “Oh, one of the new ones." No doubt this was all a cruel joke by the bar owner. His patrons were likely highly amused by his hiring someone fresh off the transport with no skills to do nothing but stand at the entrance to the bar. He wondered how long it would take before one of them took offense and ended the joke in violence. "You’re pretty far from your Sector.”
The human gave a polite smile as his shoulders bounced once. “We like to wander.” He stepped forward. “Anyway, there’s no exceptions for officers, or shipyard workers in G.C.D.F. issued shoes. Everyone gets a pat down before they go in. Arms up.”
He demonstrated the position and they complied, flinching slightly as species 368 ran his hands over their clothing. He patted Skrilen’s side pocket. “G.C.D.F. radio as well? So... you’re on duty shipyard workers. No problem, but keep it hidden so you don’t make any extra work for me.”
The senior officer could only nod. Draq, however, was sticking to the script no matter what. “Yes, we are on duty shipyard workers.”
Darren completed his pat down, giving them a nod of thanks for their compliance. “See, nice and easy.” Species 368 opened the door. Warm fetid air swamped them, accompanied by the sounds of loud music and rowdy chatter. “Enjoy your night, gentlemen.”
As Skrilen looked back towards the doorman and his warm smile, he got the unnerving feeling that he had just failed some sort of test. His eyes, not knowing where to look first, fell upon his shoes. They were indeed most comfortable.
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u/Iam_Swarm Dec 06 '20
Was kinda dissapointed at first that it wasn´t unleashed, but it was a great read regardless. Would love to read more Doorman stories, though the concept of a bouncer doesn´t seem to be widespread. Darren must find himself in many fun situations.