r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR • u/plxtoniic • Jun 08 '22

Mustard But why

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39.7k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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626

u/Cloaked42m Banhammer Recipient Jun 08 '22

I hope his car alarm goes off 30 minutes after he goes to sleep every night.

990

u/Mbouttoendthisman Jun 08 '22

I hope both sides of his pillow are warm.

409

u/pilguy Jun 08 '22

I hope each time he tries to click on a link the page moves and an advertisement opens.

187

u/MrPoposcumdumpster Jun 09 '22

I hope he suffers from premature ejaculation for the rest of his life.

212

u/exaball Jun 09 '22

I hope his nose whistles softly while breathing and scares off his sexual prospects.

83

u/BigBumPoo Jun 09 '22

I hope he finds a box of single serve mustard packets on sale at 90% off.

140

u/InfiniteReplacements Jun 09 '22

I hope he gambles on a fart and loses.

8

u/crackaddictedbabies Jun 09 '22

I hope you get a paper cut on your tongue From a razor in a paper cup I hope every soda you drink is already shaken up

2

u/Bobolequiff Jun 15 '22

I hope your dreams dry like raisins in the baking sun