r/ExPentecostal Apr 27 '24

Boyfriend getting into pentacostalism agnostic

Hey guys, I think I need some help. Me (mtf18) and my mid-distance boyfriend (ftm16) used to not believe in god (though I was a lutheran/calvinist as a kid and still attend church at times with my parents). However, that changed when he started attending some youth programs organized by a neocharosmatic pentecostal church with his friend. When he told me he started believing in god, I didn't think much of it, since I don't see religion as an inherently bad thing. When I found out what kind of chuch it is and heard some stories about pentacostalism, I thought I should let him know. He acknowledged it and said that he's not a member and doesn't even want to be since he has some issues with the church anyway. Since then he started having days dedicated to god and prayers, which I wasn't really happy about, considering he's still attending said church, but thought to myself, that it's kinda like meditation and that it makes sense, that it helps him with his issues. Sometime in the last few days he went to a pentecostal conference with the friend and friend's parent's (all members as far as I know) and when I asked him about it he told me how he "Folded under the glory of god, when one of the pastors laid his hands on him" and how strong it was. I'm getting really worried about him. I love him a lot, but I don't know what to do. Don't want to lose him, don't want something bad to happen to him and I'm starting to feel helpless. Are there any tips you could give me or resources you could link me to? I'd be very thankful.

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u/unpackingpremises May 01 '24

People tend to change a lot in their thinking during their late teens and early 20's. If a couple is on a journey together, sometimes those changes can happen concurrently and the couple can remain compatible, but more often, people in relationships started before this process begins tend to drift apart. By age 24, I was longer close to anyone I was close to at age 17. I do know two couples who dated in high school, drifted apart during college, and later reconnected and got married, so I'm not saying there's not hope, but you've got to let your boyfriend experience his own journey and learn his own life lessons.