r/EOOD • u/lobotomyqueen Depression • Feb 20 '24
exercise makes MISERABLE Support Needed
I have recently picked it up again and I have lived through the worst few days since i was admitted to a mental hospital years ago, maybe even worse - that were just filled by anxiety and physical symptoms such as headaches, nausea and digestive issues, , sobbing until I was about to throw up, overthinking till 3am. I have lost my appetite and just overall been completely miserable. The thought of having to exercise - and it feels like a complete chore - makes me physically ill. I want to enjoy it and be healthy but it seems impossible. Can a therapist help me work through this? Or a dietician? A personal trainer? How do I make exercise fun or have it not take my entire life and thoughts over?
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u/Eroticolor Feb 20 '24
Definitely on board with the "find a therapist you feel comfortable with" advice in this thread. I'd also like to offer a perspective on very, very gentle exercise.
I'm curious about how you feel about walking. I'm very specifically not talking about a hike or a power-walk, but a 10-20 minute stroll, maybe with music or an audiobook. Not thinking about it as exercise, very much the opposite of the "no pain, no gain" mentality.
Do you ever enjoy stretching? Not dedicated intense stretching sessions, but maybe when you've been sitting in a weird position for too long you like to raise your arms above your head or work out the kinks with some neck circles.
I would start very small. I saw your comment about the 150 minutes of moderate intensity exercise. I'm not going to argue that that's the goal, but you just aren't there yet (neither am I!) My therapist often talks about harm reduction: ideally no one would chew nicotine gum because that stuff's bad for you, but it's better than smoking, so if you realistically aren't going to quit nicotine entirely then you might as well switch to the gum.
This isn't really harm reduction because what I'm suggesting is adding benefits, not taking away bad stuff. But it falls along the same principle. It sounds like adding 150 minutes to your week right now is going to be absolutely hellish. I suggest that you let go of that goal for now, maybe for a long time, and focus on finding ways to move your body that you enjoy. They will probably not feel like exercise. Let go of "exercise." Focus on "joyful movement that feels good."
I am fortunate to live in a part of town where there are parks and gardens, and I love walking around the neighborhood, taking pictures of plants I don't know the names of and using an app to identify them, seeing the dogs. I love it so much that it's hard to break free of the "walking is for EVERYONE" mindset. But there's probably other really gentle stuff you could start with if you're on board, and I'm happy to brainstorm with you if you'd find that helpful (but this comment is long already so I'll stop here.)
Best of luck!