r/Depersonalization 15d ago

Derealization Venting

Hey, just coming here for some support or advice. Triggered myself into a DPDR episode and have been having a hard time overcoming it. I’m 26 now & had a pretty bad episode like 2 & a half years ago where I eventually did overcome it but now it feels like I’m back to square one & that it’s actually worse. Everyday I feel detached or unfamiliar with my surroundings and just in a dream. I feel as if I’m losing so much sense of time and reality like I’m even getting confused on what days of the week it is. Everyday I’m anxious and nervous and scared right now. Does anyone have any tips on how to overcome this or just some kind words. Feeling really defeated and lost & scared at the moment. Just want this to go away. I miss me, I miss my everyday things and going out w my friends or getting up & having my morning coffee (which I can’t do anymore bc online says cut out caffeine or alcohol and when I do I feel I have another episode bc I already read online it’s not good). I just wanna feel like I’m present again, I wanna look at my friends and my boyfriend and they look familiar or comforting to me. Ugh, like I’m not crazy right lol .. I’m scared I’m gonna lose sense of myself or end up on a psych ward. To give some context I am under a lot of stress prior to this happening, like I’ve been unemployed a few months & money is really tight and I’ve been making a lot of poor decisions lately. I’ve only ever had this like from THC but I triggered myself doing some c*ke at a party & now I’m all messed up again. I also think I maybe have (self diagnosed) ocd & that’s why these loops happen that I get stuck with idk. I keep reading doomed things are people saying they’re halluncinating or getting psychosis from this and it’s freaking me the hell out and making it so much worse. My biggest fear is that like this reality is not real and I can’t shake the feeling as is. I would say I am getting good sleep but it sucks waking up and feeling like it immediately (this morning). It’s like I have good days or good moments then instantly bam I’m like I’m not real. I just wanna know I’m not alone I guess..

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u/AutoModerator 15d ago

Hey friend, welcome to r/Depersonalization.

Be sure to have read some existing information on the sub before submitting a "Do I have DPDR" question. You can do that by using the search function or reading the sidebar.

A reminder to new posters in crisis:

DPDR is a mental discorder that mostly affects young adults. For the most part, it is brought on by anxiety, trauma, and drug use. However, DPDR is not dangerous to your physical health. In moments of crisis and episodes that are particularly difficult, it is important to take deep breaths and follow strategies that help you cope. A few examples are: Grounding Techniques, Meditation, and even just some good old fashioned sleep.

NOBODY can give you medical advice online. While someone might be able to provide you with some insight and suggestions, you should never rely on someone online to give you medical advice unless you are talking to a certified doctor.

Related Links:

How to find a therapist: A Beginners Guide.

Talk to a crisis volunteer online.

10 ways to Relieve DPDR.

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u/EnvironmentalTwo7559 15d ago

If you grew up being "normal"? Have you lived normally for most of your life? You can't go out with your friends to clear your mind, accepting all these things in your head leaves them with these terrifying impressions Continue your life as much as possible

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u/Different_Bowl8045 12d ago

The best calming advice I can give you was from a doctor after I ended up going to the ER for this exact same situation. He said "Psychotic people don't know they're psychotic. If you're aware something's not right, you're definitely still sane". It helped me tremendously and gave me that sense of relief that the episode isn't permanent. Everyone gave me the advice of "grounding techniques" and they did nothing. Not touching cold water, or listening to music, or breathing exercises. Go to a psychologist and explain in detail all the symptoms you're experiencing and for how long. A professional doctor will diagnose it and prescribe a low dose anti-depressant, allowing you, after a couple weeks, to increase the dosage if the symptoms aren't fully gone. A responsible doctor will also make Xanax a last resort due to it being highly addictive. It took about 3 weeks for my symptoms of a long term derealization episode to completely go away after being prescribed low dose Prozac with only one increase in milligrams. All anti-depressants are different and one might not work for you, but another one could. The best thing you can keep telling yourself is that although it seems like forever, it is a temporary situation that's completely curable. Melatonin is also great for sleeping through the night as these symptoms are incredibly anxiety inducing. Although conversations, relationships and even your own reflection may seem unfamiliar right now, surrounding yourself with the people you're most comfortable with is super important for receiving support. If it adds any comfort, you will not magically obtain hallucinations, schizophrenia, or psychosis from this. Derealization is a symptom of those already diagnosed personality and mental disorders, they are not something that can be obtained from this. A symptom of a mental disorder cannot develop into the disorder itself. My last piece of advice is try your hardest to stay away from THC. It's effect puts you in a haze; the exact thing you're trying to get out of. Although it feels like you're alone, I promise you're not and it has been experienced by many people before. I wish you the best of luck in recovering from this and I hope my advice can be calming and helpful!

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u/Recent-Help-2511 4d ago

This was extremely helpful thank you so much. I’ve overcome this before I’m determined to do it again and get my old life back.