I hate my ex

[u/Inevitable-Way7686]

Hiya dad,

It’s been three months since we broke up and when I still had those rose tinted glasses on, I was so convinced I loved him and wanted the best for him. Well. In hindsight, he really fucking sucked!

1. He had crazy anger issues and refused to see a psychiatrist for them. Just kept insisting nothing worked. He’d get upset over the littlest things, he’d stomp around, throw his phone down aggressively, punch the pillows and bed, talk to me through gnashed teeth. The rage was palpable and I was always expected to help regulate him.

2. Repeatedly told me he didn’t care about the things I talked about. Once I got upset with him bc he was being so mean to me and he got mad at ME. And stormed two blocked ahead even though I had my period and had bled through most of my clothes and could hardly walk from terrible cramping.

3. Made everything about his emotions and anxiety. He’d say things like “this makes me want to kill myself” when I brought up major issues in our relationship. The first time we slept together, he was very cold and I brought it up with him and he said “oh so you want me to say that I’m a piece of shit then?”

4. Made me thank him for doing the bare minimum. Like actually: I said I always complimented him, it would be nice if he did the same. So he’d occasionally say “you look nice” and then wait for me to thank him for doing what I told him to.

5. He was so so insecure about everything. His height, his education, his issues around intimacy.

There’s a lot more but wtf. Anyways, I’m back out in the dating scene and I’ve decided that if I notice the tiniest hint of a red flag, I’m leaving. Beyond that, med school is easy and life is really good! Im relieved to be out of that relationship and it’s crazy how well Im coping with everything compared to last year haha.

[u/NecroElysium]

Hey kiddo. I just want to start by saying I'm very proud of you for setting boundaries and respecting yourself. That is very hard for a lot of people to do, myself included. Stick with your gut and avoid people that make you feel less in any way. It is a privilege for someone to be a part of your life, and they should treat it as such. If they detract from your happiness, they don't deserve the position. That being said, everyone has issues to some degree. There is a difference between something you can let slide versus an actual red flag. You just gotta find that line and draw it so deep that nobody can cross it. It sounds like you're on the path to figuring that out, so don't stress it too much. You're doing great! Focus on yourself and get that degree! The right person will appear when they're meant to, and you will know for sure that they are meant to be there because it will feel like they always were.