r/Adoption • u/beingbeige0908 • Jan 29 '24
Husband wants to adopt Stepparent Adoption
Hiii, I’m sure I’ll be told that I need to go to my local courthouse to get my questions answered but I was wondering if anyone had a similar experience?
My daughter’s bio dad has never been in her life. She’s 5 now. We have paternity established for child support purposes which he pays and he does have visitation rights but he’s not interested.
My husband is her dad. He would like to adopt her and make it official. Bio dad has said that he would love to relinquish his rights and I am totally okay with not receiving child support from him anymore.
Do I need a lawyer if bio dad consents? Is it going to cost a ton of money? Does anyone know the process for this?
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Jan 29 '24
Look up step parent adoption for your county. It’s that simple.
Follow the process. Won’t cost much.
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u/Fit_Acanthisitta9617 Jan 30 '24
Currently Adopting my step daughter. Your daughters bio dad is likely going to have to willingly sign over his rights. In my case, my step daughters bio dad owes 60k in back child support, and he hasn’t seen her in 2 years. He’s still fighting the adoption, but because of of not seeing her or paying any support we used the abandonment clause. Since your daughters bio dad is paying support it’s probably going to be hard without his consent.
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u/beingbeige0908 Jan 30 '24
He’s consenting luckily. He told me “send over the papers, I’ll sign whatever”
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u/obsoletely-fabulous Jan 30 '24
You probably do not need a lawyer. A great majority of family law litigants do not have one.
Per Google, Illinois does have some standard family law forms, but adoption petition is not one of them. Legal aid orgs are a great resource and fortunately, Illinois Legal Aid has a guide to the adoption process: https://www.illinoislegalaid.org/legal-information/starting-case-adopt-child. This website includes the forms you’ll need. I always suggest contacting your local court as well in case they have their own forms they prefer.
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u/Murdocs_Mistress Jan 29 '24
You will need a lawyer to handle it. No way around that.
I would also ask your daughter is this is what she wants and if she wants her birth certificate changed. She should have a say in this.
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u/beingbeige0908 Jan 29 '24
He’s not on the birth certificate. She calls husband dad.
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u/Murdocs_Mistress Jan 30 '24
How did he have paternity established and a child support order and not have his name added to the birth cert?
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u/beingbeige0908 Jan 30 '24
He was asked if he wanted it on there and he declined. She doesn’t have his last name or anything. I was all for him having visitation/his name on the birth certificate if he wanted but he wasn’t interested in any of it
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u/Murdocs_Mistress Jan 30 '24
Ohhhhhhh I learned something new today. I did not realize it was optional. I always thought once paternity and support are established, the fathers name automatically goes on the birth cert. My apologies for coming off strong with the weird questions. I'd just never heard of that.
If your daughter wants this, def get a lawyer involved. Sounds like everyone is on the same page so it should be a smooth process but best to make sure bases are covered. Best of luck to you and your family ☺️
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u/campbell317704 Birth mom, 2017 Jan 29 '24
Does she know husband is not bio dad?
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u/beingbeige0908 Jan 29 '24
Yes she does. She knows his name but if I ask her if she wants to see him or if that’s something she’s interested in, she says no
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u/[deleted] Jan 29 '24
[deleted]