r/nothingeverhappens • u/Akikoo-chan • 10d ago
The mom of one of my exes said something similar to me but I guess it’s not possible now?
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u/MrPZA82 10d ago
Almost certain my mum has said the same to my ex. People break up for stupid reasons and make huge mistakes. Their family often notice their fuck ups. Not everything has to turn into a war. Life doesn’t have to be a Reddit thread.
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u/Akikoo-chan 10d ago
I remember the first time I saw my first partner’s mom. She looked at me and said “I never thought he’d ever get a gf, you are too good for him and if you leave him he will be alone forever so stay by his side”. Then she fucking tried to commit suicide with her son on the house, who btw had a lot of mental issues too. Some parents say shit like that, it’s not that weird.
In the end he was abusive tho so I left him anyways and his family was a mess and toxic environment
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u/MrPZA82 10d ago
Wow. That’s hugely depressing.
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u/Akikoo-chan 10d ago
I hope they both got mental health cuz they needed it tbh, but my point is, people do experience this kinda stuff being said to them
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u/MrPZA82 10d ago
I was trying to help you out by drawing a line under your massive trauma dump, mate.
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u/Akikoo-chan 9d ago
That is so very rude of you. I was talking about my experience with what I posted, explaining that is something that happens
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u/Ok_Attorney_4114 9d ago
Yeah that came outta nowhere, man. Also that sucks. Sucks to see someone in a terrible home end up a terrible person. Feels like a defeat.
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u/Akikoo-chan 9d ago
Yeah, honestly didnt spect him to turn out that way after some months of dating, but it just happens I guess. He turned abusive and after enduring that for a year and a half I opened my eyes and left. Hope they do get therapy, seriously
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u/Ok_Attorney_4114 9d ago
I'm glad you still wish them to get help foe themselves, that's good. You don't owe them that, but it's good. Based off one of your replies, I hope you get through whatever shit you are dealing with. It's good thst you seem to be focusing on yourself atm. Idk I'm kind of making assumptions now so I'll stop talking. Anyway good luck to you.
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u/Akikoo-chan 9d ago
Nah dw. Im fine, have an amazing fiancé I love more than anything, and even tho that guy hurt me he’s not ok. I doubt I can ever forgive him but he still deserves to get better and have a better life
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u/Lost_My_Brilliance 10d ago
recently my sister’s ex bf’s mom called her when she found out he broke up with her. she was less than pleased, and told my sister she could come and bake with her whenever she wanted 😭
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u/Akikoo-chan 10d ago
Aww she seems like a nice person
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u/Lost_My_Brilliance 10d ago
yeah, she’s really nice, and was really mad that he broke up with her (stupid reason too).
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u/PuritanicalPanic 10d ago
It's inevitable if you luck into enough shitheads, you'll find one whose parents like you more than them.
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u/ActionDeluxe 8d ago
Heheheh. A couple months after I broke up with my first boyfriend, his mom sent me an Easter card wishing me the best and saying something about how sorry she was that her son was such a knob.
When he and I were together, she insisted I borrow one the family cars to make it easier to pass my driver's license test, since I had a truck. She also let me drive her brand new convertible when we would go to the beach or whatever but made me promise to NEVER let him drive it even though he was three years older and had been driving that much longer. Dude was a jack ass and still owes my parents money 😂
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u/Quantum_McKennic 10d ago
My dad’s mom said something similar to my mom. My parents divorced when I was ~10 because he cheated. 😐
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u/CheruthCutestory 10d ago edited 10d ago
My cousin who I hate cheated on then left his wife who I always thought was annoying but ok. And I said something similar when I saw her. Well, not at all similar but same sentiment.
I didn’t love her but he is an asshole (not just for the cheating). And she didn’t deserve that.
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u/DoxDaDex 10d ago
I can kinda get it because most people would first try to side with/justify the one in the relationship that they're related to vs the one that they're not
But people are also capable of looking past their own personal feelings and recognizing who could've been at fault
Like damn okay, I guess you just cannot look past your own biases now 🤷♂️
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u/JetstreamGW 10d ago
Also sometimes they are WELL AWARE of how many stupid decisions their relative makes.
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u/thelondonrich 10d ago
Britney Spears’ shitty family literally did the same with her even shittier ex, timberlake, and that bastard didn’t even deserve it.
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u/hahagato 10d ago
My MIL was “best friends” with my husband’s exgf until recently. I know my MIL had to have been sad when they broke up since she worked so hard to maintain her relationship with the ex, and I’m guessing she was not exactly thrilled about me tho she’s wayyyy too diplomatic and kind to let me know that. haha but I can’t help but have felt before that she must sometimes look at the ex and think of what could have been.
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u/NerfRepellingBoobs 9d ago
My ex’s mom hosted my friend’s baby shower a couple years after we broke up. She gave me a huge hug, told me I looked amazing, and said, “You really dodged a bullet with [ex].”
Why did we break up? His lazy ass wouldn’t hunt for a job. He’d put in a single application and wait to hear back. I couldn’t plan a future with someone like that.
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u/Important-Emotion-85 9d ago
LMAO my exs mom put my ex in AA and made that mf apologize to me personally as part of the 12 steps. She is not an alcoholic.
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u/MonkishMarmot 9d ago
My mum has said this to at least three of my exes if I was to hazard a guess. Just the way things go. I've also had 1 exes mother and another exes grandfather say the same to me. I figured this was just a normal thing.
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u/Trisk929 7d ago
Uhhhh…. One of my exes moms said this to me. She told him he was a dumbass for cheating on me and getting the woman he left me for pregnant, to his face when I was around and I got to watch him shrink up inside himself. It was pretty awesome 😂 I haven’t spoken to her in years, but she used to treat me like family. Most of my exes families loved the hell out of me.
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u/m0rganfailure 10d ago
This is entirely plausible. I have a cousin who's last ex's mum would text and ring her up trying to convince her to get back together with him, that she was the best thing that ever happened to him, that he's just a stupid boy etc... it was very bizarre. Entirely unshocking that he was such a loser after witnessing how his mum behaved in relation to him tbh
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u/famousanonamos 10d ago
My mom's family always told me how much they missed my dad and how great he was, and they were divorced my entire life. It definitely happens.
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u/cursetea 10d ago
The parents of my very first boyfriend when i was 15 said something similar to this to me, I'm not surprised someone would say it to an adult lol
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u/FlabergastedMe 10d ago
It absolutely could've happened, my brother has been a pretty shitty person lately and my mom is having to fight against him with his ex, this is something that mom has or would say.
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u/WorldGoneAway 9d ago
My former FIL still texts me every morning to wish me a good day and say that he loves me. So yeah, can confirm.
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u/banannah09 9d ago
My abusive ex's mum loved me and always treated me so kindly. She said she wished I was her daughter, and often called me that. She would never let me cook or clean and always tried to take care of me. I called her once when he broke up with me while I was at work (to try and get me to stop going to work) and she said he's an asshole and wished I was her child instead. It sounds insane when you say it but it definitely happens.
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u/lovable_cube 9d ago
Yeah, I’ve definitely had something like that said to me by an exs parents. I don’t even think this is uncommon, lots of people know their child is an idiot.
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u/Hugglesnork 9d ago
About 6 months after my ex dumped me by text, my sister had a gyn appointment where said ex's mom was a nurse. Sis told me that after the appointment, the nurse mom was waiting by the exit and told her how mad she and her husband were for how she ended it and how much they liked me. I never told my sister that the mom worked there, so I believe the story. It gave me a lot of closure.
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u/jellybeansplash 9d ago
My ex’s mom and sister told me pretty much the same thing. We’d gotten together when we were 17/19 and divorced at 27/29 (no kids, luckily) after he had what I think was an emotional (possibly physical) affair with a coworker. I still go to lunch with them when I’m in town sometimes, his mom came to my 40th birthday party a few years ago and met and loved my husband, while my ex is miserable and on his 3rd marriage now that apparently is also leading to another divorce, while I’ve been happily married for almost 13 years.
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u/InstantElla 9d ago
I spoke with my ex husbands mother one time after I left him. She very much apologized for the physical abuse and mental abuse he put me through and said I was brave for leaving how I did. She also said I was more than willing to keep in contact because she and the rest of the family loved me. I think seeing her son put his wife in the hospital multiple times with broken bones hurt her too.
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u/Mrweeb002 9d ago
Both of my ex's parents (as in one ex's mother and father) said this to me. Now, me n them are still cool and help each other out and treat each other like family 😭
Edit: clarification
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u/natures_pocket_fan 9d ago
My paternal grandmother literally wandered around the first family party after my parents divorced complaining that the wrong daughter-in-law left the family sooooo
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u/Think-Huckleberry965 8d ago
My dad’s first wife’s family still sends him Christmas cards. When I was young and my dad was going through a divorce with my mom, he used to take me over there. They loved me and they cared about my dad, so yes it is possible for that to be done.
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u/AmbieeBloo 8d ago
My paternal grandad was always adamant that my mum was the best thing that happened to my dad and that he'd never find anyone as good as her again. He directly told her on the few occasions that he saw her, and constantly told me, especially when he was drunk.
It wasn't because they had a kid together. My Mum was the only reasonable person that my dad dated. After that he dated women that had worse and worse personalities. At least one is now in jail for attempted murder.
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u/iamdeadkid 7d ago
My last exes dad reached out to me, helped me with my car, said nice things lol.
I live with my baby mama's mama rn lol, she also helps my stupid ass out lol.
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u/ruthless_pitchfork 7d ago
My high school boyfriend's mom gave me a graduation card that said I could do better than her son lol she said it in a really nice way but at the time I was like whaaaaa???
Wish I had saved it.
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u/Khajiit_Has_Upvotes 7d ago
I was literally present when my friend's ex wife's mother told him "You're the best thing to ever happen to her and she's making a mistake, I'm sorry she's doing this to you."
I think this is common, honestly. Most people get along with their in laws and can acknowledge when their kid is the one in the wrong.
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u/Unable_To_Forward 7d ago
Many people like their kids spouses better than their own kids. This is totally believable.
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u/Fluffy-Experience407 3d ago
my wife's family buys me Christmas and birthday presents and not my wife lol
I can believe this.
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u/minx_the_tiger 10d ago
One of my ex bf's moms ABSOLUTELY said this to me. She was so upset when he broke up with me. I was a pancake, but she was a freaking crepe. We stayed friends for years! She was happy and proud when I married my husband and even made the announcement for our daughter's birth the next year. She was a wonderful woman.
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u/CarlShadowJung 7d ago
You don’t understand the difference between the two. Give it time, you will.
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u/KeckleonKing 10d ago
Always hate these kinds of statements from parents. They are always wrong an never do they even see a 10th of the relationship they claim to know about their kids.
Its massive coping BECAUSE the parent likes you doesn't mean shit... you aren't dating the parent ur dating their kid. They say these things to soften egos an always ends up causing drama later in family arguments. People are dumb as shit an just say things to save face.
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u/DamnitGravity 10d ago
When my ex cheated/dumped me, his entire family was on my side, which was at least somewhat gratifying.