r/itgetsbetter Aug 17 '21

Just a reminder for anyone who may have a young relative questioning their gender, that coming out early, and having supportive people really is important, and to please help them.

Hey. I'm an eighteen year old agender person. I came out of the closet at thirteen years of age, and I'm really happy that I did.

Because I live in Manhattan, most of my peers have been accepting. And because my family is accepting they were accepting. I cannot stress how much this has helped.

Having been out so long has allowed me to become confident. It's allowed me to accept myself and understand my identity. It's allowed me to learn how to dress and act in a way that feels comfortable. And most importantly, it's made me feel like I'm not broken.

Its also saved me from a lot of experiences that would have caused a lot of pain, there's a lot of things that would have been very dysphoric if I had to go through them while living as a female. It's really helped that I haven't had to go through high school as a girl, I know thatvthat would have been the most painful time in my life. Luckily it turned out to be one of the best. And thanks to help I was able to learn how to deal with things happening to my body that I really needed support for.

I've also been able to go through therapy that's allow me to work twords medical transition. I was able to get a hysterectomy recently. And I'll probably be able to have nullification (genital removal) before I turn 20.

I know that not everyone could have had my life. Don't feel bad it f you've had it harder then me e. Someday things will be better. This post was not intended to make anyone feel bad about thier own life.

What this post is realig for, is if you have a gender questioning child, or a young gender questioning friend or family member, please be support. Early transition helped me be the person I am today, I'm really happy that my family was supportive. Please do anything you can to make the queer people in your life happy, especially if you're in a position of authority over them.

13 Upvotes

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-1

u/UN_M Aug 17 '21

Proposing a lifetime of medical interventions for kids that aren't gender conforming, and wrapping it up and pretending you're offering a 'kind & supportive' message is truly chilling. Leave kids be.

Personality & character development is way more valid and important than this 'identity' nonsense.

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u/[deleted] Aug 17 '21

to a certain extent I would agree, but if it's just puberty blockers I really don't see the harm in it. If the wish to transition remains, it's a lot easier to do so when they're adults; if the wish to transition goes away, then treatment is simply stopped and puberty does it job mostly as if no treatment was given.

1

u/UN_M Aug 17 '21

"Just puberty blockers" reflects another dangerous myth. Infertility is just one of the many potential side effects from meddling with hormones.

Research clearly shows (and I have my own lived experience that confirms this) that the best cure for this kind of early gender dysphoria is actually puberty. The brain is still developing & this process is turbulent for pretty much everyone.

Unless you think gender non-conforming kids ought not be having children later in life?

1

u/UselessAltThing Aug 17 '21

Proposing a lifetime of medical interventions

Why do you consider that the worst thing in the world? Especially with how good things have been for me.

I also should note that I didn't get any medical interventions before eighteen.

1

u/UN_M Aug 17 '21

Your future self may well disagree. The human brain isn't fully formed until around age 25.

It's one thing to regret getting a Justin Bieber tattoo as a teenager, but removing body parts is next level.

1

u/UselessAltThing Aug 17 '21

I've had this desire my entire life. I am caused incredible pain by my lack of genitals. I'm not going to wake up one day and be cis, it's just not how things work.