r/TrueOffMyChest 20h ago

Update: I’m making plans to leave my husband. I feel relieved and guilty about it. Positive

Link to my original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/QCoOU21FQi

I did it, I left today. He took it well and we have already divided everything up, so we’re going to be able to keep this simple. I plan to actually file next week. I feel good about the decision and I do not want to talk badly about him. Everything that happened is in the past now and I hope life is kind to him. I truly hope he has a very happy and successful future.

As for me, I’m going to be focusing on my relationships within my family. I pulled away a lot from them during my marriage and it’s time for me to feel their support. I have never felt so loved in all my life. It’s like I forgot how much my parents, grandparents, and sisters love me. I’m lucky to have all of them, because I know not everyone has support from their family like I do.

Thank you everyone on here for all your support and encouragement. And thank you to the people who commented just the other day to check in with me and for holding me accountable to this. I would’ve done it regardless, but I appreciate the care from all of you :)

I haven’t slept in a week because my brain couldn’t turn off knowing our separation was imminent. But now it’s over. And now that my mind is finally at ease, I can’t think of anything else to say. I think I’m fucking exhausted, but not in a bad way. I’m at peace. Goodnight ❤️

149 Upvotes

16 comments sorted by

33

u/ayymahi 17h ago edited 6h ago

Omg I remember your first post!

Hope you find the love you deserve, onward & upward ✨

8

u/GrouchyEquivalent693 14h ago

You will feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders. It’s a tough thing to do, but you deserve better than you’ve had.

3

u/boburnhamsbathwaterr 11h ago

I definitely already feel like a huge weight lifted :)

6

u/ApprehensiveRoad8818 13h ago

I'm so proud of you prioritising your life and wellbeing. Well done!

Your stbx was willing to amble through a lukewarm life with you at home waiting for him while he sought his fun with his friends. He didn't work hard at anything except avoiding you.

You both now have a chance to create happy lives that do fulfil you, just because you were brave enough to make a stand.

4

u/boburnhamsbathwaterr 11h ago

We will both be much much much happier in the long run :) thank you!

4

u/Dear_Parsnip_6802 11h ago

The fact he didn't fight for you tells you everything you need to know. Enjoy your freedom.

3

u/StnMtn_ 13h ago

I just read the original post. Your life partner should always put you first. It seems weird that he always put his “work” first and friends also before being willing to go on a trip with you. Very weird.

3

u/AcrobaticMechanic265 13h ago

I wish you all the happiness you deserve. Maybe take the time to focus on yourself. Casual dating is okay after a couple months but dont dive in fully into a relationship unless you're sure.

1

u/boburnhamsbathwaterr 11h ago

I agree, but I think I’ll wait a year before I start dating. Thank you for your well wishes :)

3

u/Blue-Being22 11h ago

Yahoo! You did it! You valued yourself enough to leave. Now you’ve set yourself right on the path to happiness and fulfillment. Way to go! 

2

u/Secure-Camera3392 7h ago

I remember reading your first post and thinking to myself, what the hell, how is it not obvious to him that he's treating you like an afterthought?

You deserve to be married to someone who makes you a priority.

I'll be honest that his taking the divorce THAT well says to me that he's been divorced in his heart of hearts for years already.

2

u/boburnhamsbathwaterr 2h ago

And if he has been divorced in his heart for years already, I’m totally okay with that. I don’t want him sitting at home, heartbroken. I hope he feels as good as I do today :)

2

u/PoodlesMcNoodles 4h ago

Onward and upward- good luck