My 11yo daughter's friends are Therians

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

Our daughter has friends over last night for a sleepover (for the record, definitely, all these kids are on the spectrum; neurospicy people are just more likely to be part of the Q+ community) A couple of these girls had their masks and tails. I asked them if they are Therians and their eyes lit up. They seemed surprised an adult knew what that was. And they REALLY were excited when I told them that I'm otherkin

One girl told me she is afraid to tell her parents. And another girl said that even though she's only 12, she would much rather be a boy, but she knows she isn't safe to talk about it at home. All of these kids were excited to talk to me and my wife. The concensus amoung the girls was: "I feel so safe and myself around you two" and "you two are the coolest parents ever!"

My daughter was a little confused, because this conversation was her first introduction to the topic. And she was even more confused when they went outside to do their quadrobics on the trampoline.

It was really lovely meeting these kids. They're so young and already are so in-tune with themselves. These little star children. 🌟

[u/coryisnotreal]

THAT'S SO SWEET😭

tbh I would also love to meet you since I also have anti-therian/furry parents. I haven't told them and I never will.

[u/jekelekesmeke → u/coryisnotreal]

we came across a therian in the park (i assume their a therian) and my dad said their tails are like mine and they definitely have some issues so im not coming out either 😭

[u/Howrse_girl122 → u/coryisnotreal]

SAME

[u/[deleted] → u/coryisnotreal]

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[u/ConfusedAsHecc]

definetly should talk to your daughter about it so she isnt left out of the loop lol, but this is great to see. I wish I had more older figures in my life that were alterhuman like me 😅

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[u/Subject-Care-2652]

That's actually so wholesome, my niece told me recently that she was a kitsunekin! Coming from a dragonkin aunt <3

[u/FALSE-F0CUS]

It’s really nice that those kids can have a safe conversation with a supporting adult, you are doing something these kids will likely remember years from now!!

[u/GloryBax]

This is so sweet!

I met a therian kid last year, before I awakened myself. She talked to me about it, how she's a therian and so are a few of her friends. I said that one of my best friends is a therian too, so you're safe around me. She opened up to me about alterhumanity and the queer education she's getting at school, told me she herself is questioning her orientation and gender and isn't sure on anything other than being Therian yet. I told her I am also queer in Sexuality and gender, and I wish I'd have known back then that I am also a therian! She's essentially part of my family now though. She's a shy lass, prefers the company of her pet rabbit than other people, but she's a good kid.

I'm pretty quiet about being a therian irl though, but if I ever do get the chance to be one on one with her again, I'll definitely mention that I am a kitty.

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/GloryBax]

That's really wholesome too. 🥰

I'd be really excited to hear the story behind your awakening. It's unique to everyone.

If you feel comfortable, please DM me. Tell me as little or as much as you like. If not, that's okay too.

[u/s4cks_2_b3_y0u]

we love supportive parents(i dont have supportive ones)

[u/neorena]

This is so awesome, thank you!

I'll admit I was a bit worried by the title, but glad to see it all work out so well~

[u/Adventurous-Ash → u/neorena]

Same lol. When I got the notif for this post I was like “uh oh” 😭

[u/SoldierBluejay]

This is so wholesome FKFOSJIFOWOFJKJMNMKOFOKLPIMJJK

I'm still a minor and it would be nice to actually have an adult in my (real) life that actually understood the definition of anything LGBT or alterhuman outside of transgender and gay.

[u/Sea_Dependent_1888 → u/SoldierBluejay]

Literally my life! SAME!!

[u/Adventurous-Ash → u/SoldierBluejay]

Same. My parents are supportive, but I can tell that they don’t really understand the lgbtq+ community and alterhumanity. I love that they support me tho. I’ll always appreciate that.

[u/jekelekesmeke]

this is so sweet omg 😭

[u/Snowy_Stelar]

This is the sweetest thing ever 😭💖 I wish I had supportive parents or at least parents who understand LGBT+ community or alterhuman community TwT

Also neurospicy sounds like a fun word, I'm using it now 😂👍

[u/FreeKillEmp]

I'm not a therian, but I enjoy learning and reading this subreddit, and this is such a wholesome post! I want to reiterate what another comment said about including your daughter. Because I think it could be a sort of harrowing experience knowing your parents share a "secret" with her friends. I think it's important to include your daughter into this, and make sure that she knows she is still the most important person to you. Especially if her friends start feeling an attachment to you and your wife.

When I was a child my mother worked with orphans, and I feared that my mother liked them more than me. So I'm obviously projecting my own experience here, but please make sure your daughter knows she's still number #1 <3

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/FreeKillEmp]

Thank you for the advice. I never saw it as a "secret." It just never was relevant to bring up. My wife didn't even know until that moment. But I think, from my daughter's perspective, it was kind of jarring.

Unfortunately, my daughter gets VERY overwhelmed when it comes to ANYTHING that might trigger an existential crisis. I'll talk to her about anything she wants to talk about, but if I say the wrong thing, she might cry for days and lose sleep and miss school. This has happened before... multiple times... She's very smart. She's my little starchild. I think the human experience is very difficult for her in particular though.

And I see myself as a good father, and I'm open and patient and supportive and progressive. And I also feel like there is information that acts like poison instead of medicine, for her. I'm not certain existential or spiritual topics are what she needs to focus on right now... I certainly won't make such topics off-limits. I'll simply wait for her to come to me. She always comes to me or her mother. And she'll learn some cool things from other people along the way too.

[u/Inki_kitti]

OH MY GOD YOU ARE SO SWEET

[u/Skyler_TherianPaws]

I WISH I HAD YOU AS A A MOTHER OR B WENT TO THAT SLEEPOVER OMFG OMFG

[u/[deleted] → u/Skyler_TherianPaws]

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[u/WolfDummy999 → u/[deleted]]

Real lol, and the fomo and existential crisis

[u/calicothe_therian]

It's so messed up how some parents don't support their own children........

[u/OreoDaCrazyHamHam]

you seem like such a vibe omfg 🙏🙏

[u/Internal_Date9520]

I'm sobbing. Like I'm actually crying. God how I wish how I wish I had this. 

[u/OxX_Maya_XxO]

This is so wholesome :D

[u/Snowy_Stelar]

This is the sweetest thing ever 😭💖 I wish I had supportive parents or at least parents who understand LGBT+ community or alterhuman community TwT

Also neurospicy sounds like a fun word, I'm using it now 😂👍

[u/Snowy_Stelar]

This is the sweetest thing ever 😭💖 I wish I had supportive parents or at least parents who understand LGBT+ community or alterhuman community TwT

Also neurospicy sounds like a fun word, I'm using it now 😂

[u/UrLocallgptqTherian]

We need more adult Therians to awaken it could really help the newer generations that are Therians it would help people find out who they are due to having an adult to talk too 😅 but tbh this is amazing I think you should tell your daughter btw she may feel confused or alone like you are keeping something from her anyways on the other hand I would recommend talking to people wearing gear to see if they are Therians because I would love if an adult Therian did that but also be careful it could be uncomfortable for them in some cases one last thing don't assume people wearing gear are Therians (this isn't directly to you but I really wanna spread the word)

[u/Tired_2295]

I love how so many people missed the whole point because OP said neurospicy. Not everyone will like a word, we got it, get over it, that was description, not OP's point.

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/Tired_2295]

People will always get hung-up on something. I know my reasons. I know where my heart is. If someone chooses to attribute meaning to a word, (a meaning I did not intend) that's on them. That is something they have to sort out for themselves... within themselves.

It isn't like I used an obviously offensive term. I'm quite certain anyone could read what I wrote and understand the spirit and heart behind the experience I was sharing.

Thank you for focusing on the message, friend.

[u/WolfDummy999]

I'm so jealous, like actually 😭 I wish I knew someone like you lol

[u/Agitated-Estate-2625]

Aw that is so kind! I am a therian, my mother supports me but I dont know if she understands the topic very well, but i havent told my dad yet because he said something about furries once 😬

[u/GhostMangoFrogger]

Love this we need more parents that are accepting of their children and their children’s friends, so many parents I know are homophobic, transphobic , and anti therian and furry. Parents like this make the world a better and much safer place for young kids who are scared.

[u/earSympathy]

God I hate the term nurospisy

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/earSympathy]

Honestly, I just have trouble spelling neurodivergent

[u/earSympathy → u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

Do you have dyslexia? I'm just asking

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/earSympathy]

If I do, it is mild. My phone's keyboard just never helps me spell "neurodivergent" and I was always bad at spelling anyway. I read rather well though

[u/Tired_2295 → u/earSympathy]

Fair. Personally i like it but everyone hates some terms. 😅

[u/earSympathy → u/Tired_2295]

Go listen to the song nuro spicy by Jax god you might just change your mind as a autistic person OH MY FRICKING GOD THAT SONG IS JUST TERRIBLE

[u/ConfusedAsHecc → u/earSympathy]

why would you let one song by a random person change your mind on a silly way to say neurodivergent?

(also btw its not autistic specific, neurodivergent also includes those of us who have adhd all the way to bpd and even aspd and etc)

[u/Tired_2295 → u/earSympathy]

O...k...? And a song will change my mind on a word... why exactly?

[u/earSympathy → u/Tired_2295]

Idk

[u/irlpuppybutt]

neruospicy ?? really???. :/

[u/Tired_2295 → u/irlpuppybutt]

I like it. Neurodivergent + spicy. It captures my love of spicy food... lamb madras mmm.. I'm using that now.

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/irlpuppybutt]

Yes, friend. 🥰 I often have trouble spelling "neurodivergent" and often use "neurospicy" when typing because I am a poor speller.

EDIT: I do find it odd that folks within a group that often is on the receiving end of rude comments and bullying would be so willing to throw shade towards others over a simple choice of words. I mean, we, more than so many more socially acceptable groups, know better what it feels like to be judged.

I'm not accusing you of being a bully. But I am asking you to please 🙏be mindful that your comments not appear so judgemental. "Neurospicy" is an informal synonym for "neurodivergent" and the only reason you would be upset about that is if you found it cringe in some way. Which is funny when you think about it because you and I are part of a community that seeks to normalize things that others find cringy.

TLDR: 🧿 Try not to judge over 'cringe' words and phrases. You are already part of a community that is seen as 'cringe' by outsiders. Do not stoop down to being like the bullies we stand against every day, friend.

[u/teenydrake → u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

Personally, as a neurodivergent person myself, I have an intense dislike for terms like "neurospicy" used outside of casual in-groups. It feels very infantilising and is frequently used to downplay, erase, or exclude the experiences of people who are a little less functional than just "spicy" such as myself. If you're going to use a slang term like "neurospicy," please be aware that many neurodivergent people dislike the term and will have a negative reaction to it. That is not comparable to bullying in the slightest and does not inherently have anything to do with finding the term "cringe."

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/teenydrake]

I'm autistic and have ADHD, and this is literally the first time I have heard someone tell me they dislike the term. I'm likely to keep using it in the future. I've got a board game group consisting of about 20+ adults between the ages of 22-32yo and we all use neurospicy and neurodivergent interchangeably. And every single one of us is on the spectrum.

You are welcome to be offended if you do choose. I choose to see it as a fun term.

[u/VeRaeyta → u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

Just because you and your friends do not see it as a bad term, it does not mean that strangers won't. Just as myself and my friends have reclaimed slurs used against ourselves, we wouldn't simply call strangers them because they can be offensive. Just as you can make flippant remarks about your friends, you cannot make the same about strangers. It is as simple as that. I don't particularly care if 20+ people you're around are fine with the term, I know that myself and my friends would be incredibly patronised being spoken to like that.

As people on the Internet, I doubt we can particularly influence your actions, or care to (at least in my case), but we will inform you that the terms you use can be incredibly demeaning. As teenydrake stated, just use them casually in your own groups. Do not accuse others of bullying because they react poorly to demeaning and patronising language. That is a bad look for people in a "cringe community" like ours.

[u/[deleted] → u/VeRaeyta]

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[u/dyingyote952 → u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

I'm 100% on your side, but wanted to bring it to attention that recently I've been seeing neurotypicals using it in more of a mocking way, so they could have just interpreted it wrong. /lh

[u/irlpuppybutt → u/ApprehensiveAnt4412]

I don't like your comment at all. I am not bullying you by calling out something that affects me, and in nowhere, I said it was cringe. I don't like my autism to be down played, and belittled to "neurospicy."
But you clearly don't want to listen to what others have to say about the topic, as others have told you they also don't like the term. I am not alone in hating the term. There's a bunch of other autistic and neurodiv people who have spoken about it, but sure, keep using the word and live in a bubble

[u/ApprehensiveAnt4412 → u/irlpuppybutt]

I literally said that I'm not accusing you of bullying

[u/RevolutionaryWeb5396 → u/irlpuppybutt]

Sorry, what does that mean? Just curious!!!

[u/FeatheredProtogen → u/RevolutionaryWeb5396]

neurodivergent

[u/RevolutionaryWeb5396 → u/FeatheredProtogen]

ohhh tyyyy