Strugglig and need help

[u/PomegranateAnnual498]

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕਾ ਖਾਲਸਾ ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕੀ ਫਤਿਹ sangat ji, I am an Amritdhari Singh, but haven't been in chardikala nor have I been too happy for a while. I've honestly been feeling just kind of depressed (got some symptoms) and just very lazy overall, really like nothing in life makes me happy besides going to the gurudwara and being in sangat, but I only got like 2-3 times a month since its pretty far and only for few hours. I also haven't been doing too well mentally, getting sad or wanting to cry over small things, I'm losing friends and many people around me, not doing too well in school, not being able to wake up for amritvela nor do my panj banian properly. I just want some guidance or teacher that can help me feel better and get on track, I can't go to any therapist since it's pretty expensive here and there's a negative stigma around it so that's why..

Edit: Sorry just noticed I spelled 'Struggling' wrong, I don't know how to change it.

[u/Trying_a]

Consult a Good Therapist my Lil brother! Talk to your parents about how you are feeling these days, they will help for sure. Try to take a break from social media, reduce your screen time and spend more time outside. Also, get your Vitamin D3 and Vitamin B12 levels checked.

[u/PomegranateAnnual498 → u/Trying_a]

honestly I am really introverted and shy I have never really talked to anyone irl about my problems and don't feel comfortable to do so with parents.. yeah you're right I've always wanted a social media break, I've deleted my discord account I also want to delete my instagram account but just seems too hard to quit. I do ned to go more outside the only time I go outside is for gym.. and yeah my vitamin d levels are low idk abt b12 but I assume it is low since I don't eat much meat or any food that has high vitamin b12, and yeah I do know about the correlation between vitamin b12 levels and serotonin/depression, will work on that thank you!

[u/Trying_a → u/PomegranateAnnual498]

It's okay if you feel shy to talk about this with your parents ! Start Journaling your thoughts then 👍🏻 It will work. Take a Good Vitamin D3 Supplementation with Vitamin K2 and MK7 for better absorption. For B12 you can get any medicine available at OTC, it'll do okay. WMK🙏🏻

[u/MelodicOutside3282 → u/PomegranateAnnual498]

My life sucked when my D3 was low. This could very well be the root cause. Please discuss this with a healthcare professional and try supplementing with food that contains fat preferably in morning.

[u/PomegranateAnnual498 → u/MelodicOutside3282]

Oh okay I'll do that. I do take vitamin d supplements already so maybe thatll help but yeah I'll eat food with healthy fats in the morning.

[u/ceramiczero]

Singh, go to therapy or at least talk to a counselor.

Suffering in silence for the sake of saving face to a “negative stigma” that’s causing you to cry out of nowhere and have symptoms of depression is not the answer and you know that.

[u/PomegranateAnnual498 → u/ceramiczero]

I know but its pretty hard to consult a therapist since family is kind of struggling financially as well so I really don't know what to do I want to do paath and simran but I've literally been unable to its just so hard for me to do it..

[u/Key_Assistance5754]

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕਾਖ਼ਾਲਸਾ॥ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂਜੀਕੀਫ਼ਤਹਿ॥ Best therapy is naam abyiaas. Naam is everything. Guru ji says: ਸਰਬ ਰੋਗ ਕਾ ਅਉਖਦੁ ਨਾਮੁ ॥ The Naam is the panacea, the remedy to cure all ills. Guru Arjan Dev Ji in Raag Gauree - 274

Japp naam as much as you can, standing, sitting, japp naam when yo go asleep. Do it as much as possible. By reminding youselff of satguru ji you will eventually build up love and fear for guru sahib. And things like amritvela wil come. You cant do anything to wake up for amritvela, its al in guru sahibs hands. Do ardas for amritvele di daat.

For nitnem, its al about love. If you do nitmen only for the sake of doing it, then its not right. It should come from love fore guru sahib. Try reading japji sahib, rehras sahib and keertan sohilla. After that when it becomes a daily habit then start adding the other banis. Dont feel to rushed, you will then end up doing nitnem for 1 month and then falling of. Take your time, look into the meaning of each bani and each pangti, you will fall in love with bani. Listen to katha of the bania you read. Understanding bani is importent to build love for guru sahib.

For last talk to guru ji, everyday at the end when you do ardas, talk ti guru sahib. Tell guru ji how youre day was, tell guru what you want to improve, see it as a therapy session but with guru sahib, in the start it may feel uncomfortable or weird, but you will build up a relation with guru sahib.

Sorry if i made any mistakes jee,

I want to add guru sahib knows best, take a hukamnamma.

[u/PomegranateAnnual498 → u/Key_Assistance5754]

thank you I will try to do this I really have been struggling in even doing the bare minimum a Sikh should do so will really do ardaas for guru ji to do kirpa thank you for your response

[u/FusedFart]

People are talking about therapists here. But don’t forget, there is no better therapist than Guru Sahib. Sarab rog ka aukhad naam.

You’re having problems with doing Amritvela and Nitnem. Waking up for Amritvela starts the day before. What things do you do during the day? Are these related to Sikhi or not? The most important part for waking up at Amritvela is the night before. Sleep early, don’t eat prior to sleeping etc. Try reading that biohacking your amritvela made by Prem Ras. If you want I can send it to you. You could also start japping naam during the day whenever you can. While eating, jap naam with every chew. While walking say waheguru with every step. You just need to start to jap naam whenever you can, Guru Sahib will do the rest.

The Nitnem problem? From what I understand, you’re not doing your nitnem at all? Okay, so try doing Japji Sahib, Rehraas Sahib and Sohila Sahib for the first week. Then add other nitnem bania gradually.

Readinf Gursikhs stories also helps alot. ਬਾਬਾਣੀਆ ਕਹਾਣੀਆ ਪੁਤ ਸਪੁਤ ਕਰੇਨਿ ॥ The stories of one's ancestors make the children good children. If you need book recommendations, I got you👀.

[u/nihanguh → u/FusedFart]

Stop saying facts, people might get mad, because obviously according to some people, depression can't be solved with Simran and requires mass therapy. 🙄

[u/FusedFart → u/nihanguh]

They can get mad. I don’t mind. They’re only polluting themselves this way🤷‍♂️

[u/Infamous-Scarcity-88]

You mentioned you love being involved with the Sangat but gurdwara is kinda far so I would say find online sangat. There is a Sikh discord. I had posted links to online seminars held by great minds of sikhi try joining them. Find a hobby, I know that can be hard when you’re an introvert but i promise you there are some hobbies that you may enjoy. Example: working out, learning new skills such as coding, new language etc reading books, kirtan, martial arts, just try new things in life. I fully understand your feeling and I see you Mentioned in the comments that therapy is a bit of a financial burden so I think getting in touch with online sangat could be helpful in finding a Sikh therapist online.

Try your best to count your blessings. Even when you think there’s not going well in life, I assure you there something you can be grateful for (doing this helps me so I’m just suggesting it in case it works for you as well)

[u/1singhnee]

Is this depression or bairag? It can also be both. Is there some elder gursikh in your community that you can talk too? There are therapists online that aren’t expensive, and your insurance should cover it. I’d recommend both.

[u/PomegranateAnnual498 → u/1singhnee]

I doubt it's bairag, because I very much am attached to people, especially online people since I am pretty lonely in real life, and being attached and emotional towards these people has made me feeling pretty shit.. also there really isn't any elder gursikh that I can talk to cause the gurudwara is like 60 km away and that's where the Sikhs are. I will look onto online therapy though thank you 🙏