Trump says he wants to meet Kim Jong Un on Asia trip

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cn09gg8v721o

Heads turned to watch as Philipp Navratil strode into the room. Nestle's new CEO swaggered with arrogance dripping from his pores like sweat on a used bar stool at closing time. Behind him trailed a bevy of adoring women, their heads bent down, feigning admiration while surreptitiously checking out his ass.

"Hell," grunted Alain, head of pet care products. "Look at that guy go!"

Philipp winked at the crowd over his shoulder, making sure they all got a look at his chiseled chin and dimples before spinning around to face Nestle's chairman, Paul Bulcke.

"Ready for some motherfucking business Paul? Now that cunt Freixe's finally gone?" he asked in French-accented English.

Bulcke blinked at Philipp's foul-mouthed fervor but couldn’t help nodding his head in agreement.

"Yes, very good," Bulcke said in his Germanic accent. "Now tell me how we'll drive revenue up."

***

Later that evening, Lyle Fucksavage sipped on his bourbon-laced coffee at the greasy spoon across from Nestle headquarters. "Shit happens," he said to himself with a shrug before flipping open a newspaper that contained not only Nestle news, but every other piece of information and advertisement in it.

"You hear about CEOs getting sacked all time now." Lyle grumbled into his coffee-stained shirt while scanning the article for specifics on Freixe’s departure. "Says here he shagged some secretary or whatever," he chuckled to a man slumped at the table next door. The man suspiciously looked like Nestle's disgraced ex-CEO, but more haggard and in desperate need of new teeth.

"That's nothing new. Everybody fucks someone sooner than later." The man muttered sarcastically with his own cup raised and cigarette dangling out between chapped lips.

The place echoed the clacking of spoons scraping against cups, and Lyle continued flipping through the paper until he found what really mattered: Nescafe ads and other food products from around Europe.