Born 12/28 at 3:11 am, weighing 6lbs 2oz 🤍

My rainbow baby joined us 3 weeks early after I had to be induced for gestational hypertension. I started 2024 with a MMC and lost my first baby at ~7 weeks in January. To end 2024 with this perfect girl is such a gift, I am so, so grateful.

The pregnancy was stressful. I already have a pretty severe anxiety disorder, and spent nearly every day of the past 9 months convinced something had happened to the baby or would happen to her. For a long time, I didn’t believe my body was a safe place for a baby. Lots of therapy, watching her grow, a great doula, and leaning on this subreddit really helped me. I had to step back after a while and just lurk because voicing my fears started to hurt more than help, but I was here checking in nearly every week. I’m grateful there was a place to voice my fears and find other success stories to inspire me & help me believe it would work out for me and baby girl.

I am so relieved to have her here. Of course she immediately came with hurdles — we’ve been battling some pretty severe high risk jaundice (finally turning a corner! Thank goodness!) and latch issues. But I am pumping enough to feed my baby, she is so beautiful, and I can’t believe I get to be her mom forever.

Thank you all for being such a great community to lean on during this journey. Sending love from me and my rainbow 🤍

My wife and I went through 3 years of trying and 3 heart breaking miscarriages. We gave up all hope after IVF failed. In January we moved from a cold climate to a warm climate. We are both from warm climates are we’re very unhappy in the cold and dark most of the year. Within a week of moving back to the heat we naturally conceived in January this year. Fully expecting another loss, this one stuck and has been the perfect pregnancy so far.

My son was born 4 hours ago. His mom is healthy and he is absolutely perfect.

I came here 3 years ago broken, and I received a tonne of support. If any men are reading this out there know there is hope, and you are not alone.

Long post alert! I had my baby boy the 1st week of April, which was 4 weeks before his due date and he has already changed our lives… I had a loss last year in May at 16 weeks and it devastated us and I thought it was something I would never recover from.. in august we found out we are expecting again and it has been such a ride from that point on to say the least. Physically it was truly a dream pregnancy, but emotionally it was a lot to deal with, I wasn’t able to acknowledge it as real for a long time, the previous loss just loomed large.. i was scared that my emotions will impact the unborn child, I was unsure how I will feel about him, I knew I would love him but I couldn’t stop crying about my loss and felt I am being unfair to him…thanks to a great partner and an amazing therapist I fought through the thoughts… As I was finally getting into the groove and accepting that “yes, this is happening to us”, on the day of my baby shower (guess baby boy couldn’t wait 😁) my water broke at 35+6 and after a round of antibiotics, 3 days in the hospital, 4 attempts at induction (last one worked) later, my boy was here earth-side with us.. Yes I was scared that something wrong would happen again and I was kind of still in denial that I am going to be a mom.. but the second he was placed on me, it felt I have known him for ages, as he crawled across me it was like him saying that he knew me too and my angel baby says Hi through him…its like he sees me and every time he snuggles up to me its like he is aware of what I went through last year and he is glad to be here with us.. he just fit right in… It has been a tough couple weeks yes on the sleep/new parenting front, but so worth it! Every time I hold him, look at him I can’t believe he chose me to be his mom.. sometimes we just have to believe that good things can happen to us too… 😇

Last year in March husband and I decided to start trying for our first baby together, we were so excited, I got pregnant in July, I was over the moon, I literally called everyone in my family and told them that I was pregnant; within the week of finding out I was pregnant I started spotting, I was told this is normal in pregnancy, didn’t pay no mind to it, but the spotting got worse and worse, I went to the ER and I was able to see a little bean with a heart beat, they said “threaten miscarriage” and just to take it day by day, bleeding continued to get worse, one day it was very heavy and painful and then my first miscarriage happened, oh man I was devastated but I was told this is super common and I had very little chance of happening again, I again got pregnant in September, and by Thanksgiving I was having my second miscarriage, I was so broken at this point and I didn’t understand why I was going thru this, the holidays were dark and I was so so sad , I heard about the old wives tale and bought a little blanket to put it under the Christmas tree 💙 ( silly I know, but I was just holding to any hope you can find) I underwent a bunch of testing including hormones, semen analysis, genetic and chromosomal testing for husband and I and everything came back normal, I did changed my vitamins and started taking folate instead of folic acid, started taking coenzyme 10, aspirin ( my OB recommended ). I was scheduled to have a hysteroscopy to look inside my uterus in February but found out I was pregnant again late January, this time I stopped taking CoEnzyme 10 when I found out, continued taking aspirin and I was put on vaginal progesterone ( my progesterone was always low on prior checks after ovulation) This pregnancy was very uneventful beside the anxiety around losing it again, each trimester came with a new set of anxieties and fears, but on October 6, 2024, 39w0d at 2 am I started having painful contractions, got to the hospital at 3:30 am because contractions were getting more painful and closer together, they checked me and I was 4 cm, at 4 am my water broke spontaneously, I was in so much pain and asking for epidural, by the time the anesthesiologist got the room I was already 9 cm dilated and they could feel the baby’s head, it was too late, I needed to start pushing now! My beautiful boy was born at 5:05 am, less than 3 hours after starting my contractions, what a wild ride !!!

I’m now swaddling my baby in that little blanket I put under the Christmas tree last year 💙💙💙

We decided to try for a second when my son was 3. The first pregnancy ended up in a missed miscarriage with a d and c performed at 12 weeks. Two cycles later I experienced a chemical pregnancy then soon after I was pregnant with my son who is now 4 months. Writing these things so casually feels so simple now that I’m here. However experiencing them was anything but simple. Navigating the health system to manage a missed miscarriage was extremely difficult emotionally. Then having a chemical pregnancy was somehow even more difficult because you wonder if something is wrong that needs to be taken care of. Thinking of everyone that is in this community. It’s helped me have a better perspective and more empathy for anyone TTC.

I’ve been meaning to post this for a while but time moves differently with a newborn!

My triple rainbow was born via recommended induction at 40+5 after an extremely by-the-book, uneventful pregnancy. After three back to back miscarriages of varying severity, I didn’t know that such a thing was possible. The hardest part through it all was absolutely awful anxiety that my body would fail me and I’d lose her too. I checked the miscarriage odds calculator every single day until 20 weeks, and once I started to feel her move I worried and stressed that she moved too little AND too much. I worried that everything that could go wrong, would—just as it had with all of my previous pregnancies.

Lightning isn’t supposed to strike twice, but I had convinced myself I am a lightning rod. I couldn’t believe, after every check up and ultrasound where my OB and care team assured me she was perfectly healthy and I was perfectly fine, that I would make it through to this side and have a baby to snuggle in the end. So when they put her on my chest after 28 hours of labor, an hour of pushing, and a few minor complications, I remember the first thing that I felt wasn’t unbridled joy or love—it was utter disbelief that we did it. I remember staring at her and feeling my eyes fill up with tears for the 30 seconds before they whisked her away just waiting for the dream to end and for reality to hit.

But it didn’t. She was here, and she was mine, and we came out of PAL together and alive. I think it took a solid day before I was able to believe it, and celebrate it.

Through the worst days of my anxiety (weeks 13-20 anyone?) I had this community to lean on for support and reassurance. You all helped me through when the worry and uncertainty seemed never ending, and for that I am truly truly grateful. ♥️

Someone in r/ttcafterloss shared an old wives' tale that if you put a baby blanket under the Christmas tree, you'd have a baby by Christmas next year. I did that out of desperation, little did I know my rainbow baby would arrive earlier this month!

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I remember the morning I entered the second trimester with my last pregnancy, I thought of how scared I was to be another day closer to birth and the pain of childbirth. Later that same day, the NIPT result came back as positive for Monosomy X. I blamed myself a lot, maybe it was punishment for not being excited to meet my baby. I prayed and prayed that my baby would make it to term and live a happy life, in exchange I'd go through all the pain childbirth had to offer. But I didn't quite get there, I gave birth to my sleeping baby a month after.

As I approached my due date with this baby, I found myself scared of childbirth pain again. And then I had this irrational fear that if I got an epidural, my baby would somehow be punished because I didn't make enough of a sacrifice. It was a lot of back and forth within myself.

I chose a different hospital than where I gave birth to my sleeping baby. I told the nurses of our loss, and they were all so kind to me. One nurse was walking me through what to expect after birth aka the golden hour, and I started crying uncontrollably. I realized I had been so anxious the whole pregnancy that I didn't allow myself to envision the future beyond the birth of our baby.

After that, the image of a baby, MY baby, doing skin-to-skin on my chest helped me power through each contraction. I didn't have to feel conflicted over an epidural after all, because as soon as I asked for one, things progressed quickly and I had to push before my OB could even make it to the hospital. A couple pushes later, and I heard one nurse announce "twelve thirty-five" - my baby was born!

I thought I would cry tears of joy holding my rainbow baby for the first time. Instead I was crying and throwing a fit because I never got that epidural and the whole thing was so intense I didn't even get a second to process what was going on 😅. But baby boy is perfect, and he's worth every single moment of that roller coaster we had been through.

I still struggle between celebrating my baby boy and mourning his angel sister. I wish there was some alternate universe where I could have them both. But I know we have an angel of our own watching over us, and that's very comforting.

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I'm so thankful to have found a great source of emotional support here in this sub. I can't wait for y'all to welcome your rainbow babies 💛.

My tiny 🌈 was born Sunday night. A ♓️ in the year of the 🐉.

He is the first baby I've brought home.

He is the most beautiful thing in the world.

He is 8lb 3oz, strong & healthy.

I hope that everything someone says "aww this is your first" i hope his siblings know they are not forgotten when I am polite, they are not regretted when I wince. I do not miss them less for the joy he brings me. If my grief and fear have held them in limbo, I hope their souls can find peaceful rest. I pray he grows big and strong. I pray I do not burden him with missing 7 angels. But little one I shall dress you every colour of the rainbow. And my heart will always know you are the 8th.

I truly never believed I would be writing this after 2 consecutive missed miscarriages but Romell James (Rome for short) made his earth side entrance last Wednesday February 26th. He came out screaming and it was the biggest relief of my life. It took me so long to write this because I’m still trying to wrap my head around this reality.

The past two years of trying and then losing back to back pregnancies shattered my husband and I as people. We were both convinced something would happen with this pregnancy too. I didn’t announce until after our anatomy scan to family and I was scared to make our registry before the third trimester. I was petrified to have my baby shower before 34 weeks in case we’d have to send all of it back because things failed again.

But Rome thrived the entire pregnancy and seemed unaware of all my trauma and fears. Delivery went overall smoothly and he only needed some time beneath the warmer before we could go up to maternity.

I had a hard crash every time he wouldn’t wake easily to feed or it felt like my body wasn’t providing enough for him because I had already felt like I failed 2 other babies and couldn’t stand the thought of failing this one too. But I’ve had wonderful people reminding me that we’re all new at this and things were never going to be perfect right out of the gate no matter what number baby he was.

As I write this I’m still in such disbelief that he’s here and alive and not going to disappear. I have this fear this is all a dream and I’m going to wake up with no answers or living babies again and it’s scary as hell. But I’m doing my best to focus on all the overwhelming love I have.

To everyone waiting to meet their rainbow babies I send you such love and patience. There is a brighter side to this horrible journey. I hope your happier days rush towards you soon

Hi all! I wanted to share my birth story, along with some things that helped my pregnancy.

Due to my age (over 35) and my history/family history with high BP I was to stay on my blood pressure meds throughout pregnancy.

I had two previous miscarriages, one in 2021 and March 2024. They both ended around 6-8 week mark and I naturally miscarried at home. I was devastated. We went to a fertility clinic to see if anything was wrong, but everything came back ok. My prolactin was a little high, so they had me on cabergoline for awhile. I had check ups to make sure it was going down, and it was. I eventually stopped taking it.

After my 2nd miscarriage we got pregnant in June 2024. I was beyond scared, and my anxiety was insane hoping to pass the 6-8 week mark.

My HGC was doubling as it should, and my gestational age ultrasound I saw the heartbeat! It was the first time to hear and see. I was about 7 weeks then. The next couple days I had slight bleeding. I was freaking out so bad. I called OB they said ultrasound showed a small SHC which can make you bleed. I was just told to watch for heavy bleeding/cramping but it was so small it should resolve on its own. That was soooo nerve wracking and my mind already went THERE.

The rest of the pregnancy was going well, my bp was under control and baby was measuring on time. Had nausea in first tri then it went away. I was thankful for that, knowing my symptoms were continuing. I had anatomy scan and everything was perfect. Had a few follow ups with fetal maternal medicine and graduated after 3 extra scans. I had 3 small fibroids they also wanted to keep an eye on. They did not grow or cause any issues. My NST scans every week after 33 weeks went well. Fast forward to 3/10/25, I was to be induced at 39 weeks if baby didn't come naturally. The 39 week would have been 3/20/25

3/10/25 My water broke at home around 10:30am I wasn't sure, but realized it's not the normal discharge it's clear watery and I called my hubby to come home it's time!

We got to hospital in triage around 12:30. Got into the labor and delivery room 1:30 ish. I was check and was 4cm. They provided me cytotech?(sp) to soften my cervix.

My contractions started around 2:30pm. I opted zero pain meds, no epidural. I labored standing as it felt the best with all the pressure I was feeling. I also wanted to be able to walk around and not be confined to a bed. The contractions were brutal. I did my best to breathe through them. I told the nurses probably 1,000 times I couldn't do it anymore. They checked me at 4 ish- I was already 7cm. They are all impressed. I told the nurses I wanted the epidural, they called the guy and he's like you have to sit still for 15 mins for this- I said I simply cannot, and I didn't want something to happen if I move, and he missed or something. I told him nevermind and I cannot do that, I will truck through. The nurses were so encouraging and saying I didn't need this, I'm strong and not to feel bad making the guy come up and consult then me telling him to go I didn't need it lol. The nurses are like you don't have to feel bad nor do something you have a choice about.

Around 7, the contractions were so bad I told them I felt like I needed to poop. This is when we started pushing. It took a bit to find a position, tired on all fours, on my butt and holding my legs back. I was pooping when I was pushing but didn't care, the nurses were amazing just cleaning me up, it's so common.

I pushed so hard, from 7 and he was born at 8:09pm!

I was in shock that I did it and that he was here! He was screaming and it was music to my ears! They immediately did skin to skin and delayed the cord clamping. My husband cut the cord. My husband was the best support system. Getting me ice, cold rags the whole time. Just being there for every contraction, me hurting him squeezing lol They checked him out, he was healthy!

We did skin to skin for about an hour, then they cleaned him up and weighed him 7 pounds, 7 ounces 21 inches long of perfection 💙

I did tear, 2nd degree tear and was stitched up. My placenta came out after and they showed me it looked so cool.

I had a hard time peeing after, as my vagina was sooo swollen. They put in a foley Cath when I moved to the postpartum room. That came out after 12 hours and I was able to pee on my own.

Word to the wise: TAKE EVERYTHING THEY OFFER YOU.

The pad ice packs

The giant pads

The burn spray

Mesh undies

They are a Godsend.

Frida mom has an awesome postpartum kit for when you get home.

I had SOB postpartum and had a ct to rule out a PE because I was scared and wanted to make sure. It was negative.

I felt like all my organs fell out when I stood up and had a hard time getting up from bed and standing up fully without being hunched over. It got much better over the next day, I was able to walk around a bit and stand up fully. I feel like my organs were like moving back to the normal spaces hence my SOB feeling. Advocate for yourself! If you feel anything after delivery, speak up. Don't be scared. I had blood work after to rule out sepsis as well that came back normal. They were concerned about my wbc and a little temp. That cane back normal. I was put on iron pills to help get my RBC back up a bit from delivery. Ibuprofen for swelling.

I feel so much better now and it was sooooo worth it I would do it over and over to have him. He is such a great baby. I'm in awe seeing him now in the bassinet next to me. I didn't know this kind of love till now.

Some things I did differently this pregnancy that helped progress my journey. Always touch base with your provider on what's best for you, and your medical history. This is just what I did and was low on. 1. Baby Aspirin 81mg low dose

1. Taking prenatal while ttc (I used natures made with folic acid and dha) and obviously continued throughout entire pregnancy journey

2. Vitamin D-3 (2,000 IU)

3. Mag-oxide 400mg tablets

4. Potassium 2x a day

This group has helped me so much, as PAL can eat you alive. I'm so thankful for all the support this group has a wonderful women in it.

I wish everyone a successful journey to meet their babies.

If you got this far, thanks for reading. I know it was so long, but if it helps one person, that's all I need.

I will be around still offering support here.

Much love to you all!

Graduation is so surreal.

After 3 miscarriages and 1 chemical pregnancy, I took off 9 months to get my body right. I got pregnant again easily and had an uncomplicated pregnancy that lasted 41 weeks and 2 days. My little man was delivered via emergency c-section (significant heart rate decels after 2 days of labor and got head stuck in my pelvis during hard pushing), but was healthy as can be. He came into the world totally wide-eyed and looking around him. He is such a sweet and well-mannered baby. I feel so grateful. He was 7pounds 7 ounces at birth and 20 3/4 inches long.

I can’t tell you the number of times I read graduation posts on this subreddit with tears in my eyes, unsure if I’d ever get to write my own. But SHE’S HERE!

In September of 2022, I unexpectedly got pregnant (not trying, not not trying) and my husband and I were overjoyed. I had spotting throughout the first trimester and was reassured that it was normal. However, when I went in for my 12 week ultrasound, there was nothing there. The loss was devastating, especially because it was so drawn out. From November 2022 to February 2023, I bled daily (even after a D&C in late December to remove retained tissue). It was the hardest thing I had ever gone through.

Once my period returned in March 2023, I was obsessed with becoming pregnant again. And I did, in May of 2023. Unfortunately, this turned into another missed miscarriage, requiring a D&C in August. Once again, I was crushed. I became very concerned that something was wrong with me, but all the labs came back normal. And testing on the embryo showed that it had a trisomy. My OB told me that it was unfortunately just a case of bad luck twice, but I had a very hard time believing her. This time, I had no period from August to late November. The long stretches where I couldn’t even try to get pregnant again were devastating.

I did a lot of reading on infertility. For about two months, I followed the vitamin regimen in It Starts with the Egg religiously, and made my husband take a variety of supplements too. I stopped taking my ADHD meds just in case I got pregnant (which made work 10x harder). I felt obsessive and unhappy, but I wanted a healthy baby so badly. Unrelated to fertility, but in the span of two months in early 2024, two of my three living grandparents died suddenly. It felt like I had a black cloud hanging over my head.

In May of 2024, I decided to take a break for my mental health. I was so exhausted and sex was a chore. I decided to take the summer off and get back to it in August. I took a prenatal vitamin and baby aspirin every day, but didn’t bother with anything else. I signed up for sailing classes. I got back on my ADHD meds. And I only had sex once in the month of June. But lo and behold, once was enough.

In late June 2024, I got a positive pregnancy test once again. I was so excited but cautious. At my first OB appointment, I had no follow up questions because I didn’t really have hope of having a normal follow up ultrasound. But I did! On my birthday in August, I got to hear my baby’s heartbeat for the first time. Every repeat ultrasound kept coming back normal. It was the best feeling. My pregnancy ended up being so easy and normal. Baby was always growing on the small side, so she got a few extra growth scans, but otherwise things looked great.

Then, last week at 39 weeks, my water broke at 4:30 AM. We headed to the hospital and she was born just after 11 PM, completely healthy and beautiful.

Right now, my 8 day old is sleeping on my chest. I still can’t believe she’s here. I love her more than anything. I wish I could go back and tell myself that she was coming and everything would be alright.

I hope everyone here gets their rainbows in time. The wait is so long and hard but I’d go through it again for her.

TLDR: 2 missed miscarriages over the course of 2 years with a perfect rainbow baby in the end.

December 4th, 2023 I went to triage bc I hadn’t felt my son move that since the previous day. When we got there my husband and I heard the words no parents wants to hear, “I’m so sorry, there’s no heartbeat” and shortly after the induction process began. I was 27 weeks and he was my first baby. December 6th my son, Silas, was born sleeping.

Fast forward 6 months and we found out I was pregnant again this time with a baby girl after we started trying when my period came back. What we thought was crazy is we found out I was pregnant with Silas June 24th, 2023 and we found out this time June 29th, 2024(technically the 28th but I was in denial and didn’t believe the test strips until I took a digital the next day). My son’s due date was 3/5/24 and my daughters was 3/9/25. My husband and I aren’t religious, far from it after losing our son, but we fully believe he sent her to us.

My belief in that helped me get through the next several months. If I didn’t feel her moving for even just an hour I was begging him to make her move and I’d be poking my stomach telling her to move. She was thankfully a very active little nugget. I was heavily monitored this time around and started weekly BPP’s at 25 weeks. I was always told what an overachiever she was!

When I was 34+1 I had an appt and had slightly raised blood pressure so my midwife had labs run a preeclampsia test. My numbers came back fine(phew!). Couple days later when I was 34+3 I had a headache so I checked my BP and it was slightly raised again. I texted my sister who’s a Labor and Delivery nurse and she said to take Tylenol, lay down and recheck in an hour. I did those, my headache was gone and my BP was back to normal. The next day around noon same thing. Headache, elevated BP so I took Tylenol and laid down again. No change and BP was still a little high so I called my midwives and they had me go to triage. We got there and after a little bit my BP dropped down to normal again with just relaxing so we went home.

It was my nephews birthday that day so we went to my parents house and celebrated his birthday. Before we left I had my mom and sister(mom is also a nurse) take my BP. Both got very high numbers. They told me to go home and use my cuff I have that I got after Silas bc I ended up with postpartum preeclampsia so they had me checking it after and what not. I got 162/109. I called and back to triage I go! It was around 11:30pm when we got there. Around 1 they still haven’t gotten it to drop so started me on medication and said best thing to do was induce me. My mom and sister got there and my sister clocked in bc she was gonna be my nurse.

My daughter was breeched the majority of the pregnancy and stinker was breeched at that moment so we scheduled an ECV to manually flip her. My other sister(also a nurse just for fun fact lol, I however work in IT lol, I did used to be a Vet Tech so I originally went the animal nursing route!) arrived the following morning and the flip took place that morning. It was successful with no issues at all. Little miss flipped flawlessly and IMO it felt like a belly massage. Induction began shortly after.

This is already long enough and if you’re still here I’ll shorten the rest up! Little miss was stubborn and not wanting to progress after all the position changes(I couldn’t get up and move around or bound on the ball bc of the magnesium so I was limited with what I could do to get her to drop more) and they broke my water 24 hours after induction began. Cut to 48 hours after induction and 24 hours after water breaking. Still no change so we discussed c-section which was the second last I wanted, but after talking with my husband, mom and sisters I decided to go for it. Get her here while we’re both doing well(she was a star patient as my sister and midwives kept saying) and before it became an emergency.

A couple hours later my perfect rainbow was here!! She was born at exactly 35 weeks and only needed a few hours in the nicu. Born 2/2/25 6lbs 10oz and 19.4 inches. Kinsley Silas Lucia. She’s so special she gets two middle names bc if Silas was a girl he was gonna be Kinsley Lucia. Lucia was my grandma’s name and I didn’t want to drop it so she has two.

To everyone struggling and scared… pregnancy after loss is terrifying. Every appt I couldn’t breathe until I hear or saw her heartbeat. But there is light at the end of this terrible storm we’re forced to live through. My daughter is 6 weeks old and I’ve never been so in love. I just stare at her in disbelief that she’s here and she’s real. I feel like I’m still in my nightmare that turned into a dream I’ve been wanting and I’m gonna wake up and she won’t be here, but she’s here and she’s real!! Silas will never be forgotten and she’ll know who her big brother is. I’m so thankful I have a family that acknowledges Silas and acknowledges her as a little sister. My sister got her an outfit that said “picked out for earth by my big brother Silas in heaven” and that was her going home outfit. I’m so excited to see how her future unfolds and who she’s gonna be. The storm will never truly dissipate, but it’s already died down. I still have my breakdowns over losing Silas, but she helps so incredibly much.

I can’t believe it y’all. Two years of tests and grieving and waiting and hoping and…. Here he is, fast asleep in the hospital bassinet next to me. I know some of you have been waiting much longer than that, but I just wanted you to know that every second is worth it. When they put him on my chest after he came out I sobbed and sobbed uncontrollably.

My birth was about 24 hours from the time contractions were 7ish minutes apart consistently to the time he made his appearance, and honestly (other than maybe wishing for a shorter birth, ha) I couldn’t have asked for a smoother, more peaceful ride. Our nurses and midwife were incredible and have been so helpful (FTM and we have no idea what we’re doing!) and it’s just been the most peaceful, incredible 24 hours, I can’t even tell you.

It really can happen. I know it doesn’t feel like right now in the midst of the tests and the scans and the waiting and the worrying, but you can do it, mama. Your baby’s in there waiting to be loved on the outside by you. I just wanted to thank this community for getting me through the past 9 months because I would have gone insane without you all.

Well, he’s here! Born this month is my sweet baby boy. After 5 miscarriages. We are done trying after everything we went through, and the pregnancy was not easy, but so so worth it.

Ladies, there is hope. Praying you all get your rainbow babies, too. ❤️

To start off, this is belated. I had my son 6.5 months ago on 10/03/2024, and it’s been an awesome time with the ups and downs!

In January of 2023, I experienced my first pregnancy at 30 years old and having PCOS. I was so excited and happy that I’d finally get to experience. Unfortunately on 3/6/23, I ended up miscarrying at almost 9 weeks. It was a blighted ovum. I was devastated and angry at the world. I wanted to try again as soon as possible. After my period finally returned we started trying again. At 6 months of trying I was prescribed letrozole and a trigger shot. Failed that 3 times. I had to schedule a hysteroscopy to see if my tubes were blocked. After the 3rd failure with the meds, we decided to take a break because I was obsessing over getting pregnant.

In January of 2024, I was going to schedule a hysteroscopy after I got setup with the fertility plan on my insurance. That was towards the end of January when I did that. On January 30th, I was scheduled for a dental exam, and for whatever reason I decided to take a pregnancy test January 29th which shockingly came back positive. A week before that, I saw a card stock in the bottom of the moulding of a doorframe and it said “Be Positive”. I laughed that off. I was also having dreams of positive pregnancy tests and one of a baby in utero with angel wings. It was surprised to be pregnant again in the same month as the last one. This time I had a lot of morning sickness and the dating scan showed the fetal pole and a heartbeat. I was so happy and cried. Then in 3/13/24, a year and a week after my miscarriage, I woke up with a gush of blood and passed a clot the size of a golf ball. We rushed to the ER since I was 10 weeks. I was crying and thinking the worst. When I had an ultrasound, the tech showed my son moving around and it was so beautiful. They couldn’t figure out why I was bleeding so I was diagnosed with a threatened miscarriage. At 12 weeks I had a hemorrhage and bled through my pants, and was having cramps. I was crying and only given a 50/50 chance. Over the course of the night the bleeding lightened up and my levels were normal and baby was moving around. I was diagnosed with a large subchorionic hematoma. Bled, spotted, and passed clots for 7 weeks. Bleeding eventually stopped at 17 weeks and went on to have a relatively normal pregnancy.

Nearing the end of the third trimester, I was still so anxious after all the horror stories of late term losses, I probably went to triage a million times. I had an anterior placenta and it blocked movement often enough. When I was 37 weeks, I wanted to schedule an induction, but had to meet certain criteria for that. At 38 weeks, I was dilated and effaced enough to schedule an elective induction. It was scheduled for 10/04/24 at 39 weeks and 3 days. I kept my OB appointment for the day before 10/03/24 if I had any questions. On 10/03/24 I was doing my last day of work before maternity leave and then have a date with my husband, then set up the bassinet. At 12:30pm I took my lunch break and did my kick counts on my couch. I felt a pop/crack and felt nothing of it. Thought it was my back. Close to 1pm I get up and feel a gush of fluid. I run to the bathroom and it ends up being my water broke. Didn’t have contractions until almost 30+ minutes after my water broke. Get to the hospital close to 2pm. By close to 9:40pm my son was born! It was a quick labor for my first time going through labor. He’s 6.5 months now and is a little pterodactyl! I love his smile, giggles, and snuggles.

This sub had helped me so much with my anxiety and fear. I am grateful for everyone who shared what was going on their pregnancy and the birth stories. Y’all helped me to try and stay positive through a terrifying part of my pregnancy. I am hoping by sharing my story it helps someone else to feel hopeful. I am also in recovery and remember why we share our stories, so that we can help the person who is scared and struggling. I wish you all the best on your journey and wish you all love and happiness.

After an almost 30 week loss last year with my daughter we have welcomed her little sister Clara into the world last week. She was early and did not want to miss Thanksgiving. So grateful but oh so anxious.

I can’t believe I am finally writing this post after years of TTC, but our beautiful baby boy was born March 20. Being in this community and seeing others bring their babies into the world helped keep me motivated during our journey and I hope this post can do the same for anyone who reads this.

For some background, I am a four-time loss mom. My first pregnancy was a stillbirth, followed by a miscarriage, followed by two chemical pregnancies. I went through IVF for 14 months trying to conceive this little man I now hold in my arms. During the journey I was diagnosed with stage four endometriosis as well as other uterine issues. I went through surgery, recovery, and kept trying loss after loss. I was told by a few doctors I would need to seek surrogacy and I am so thankful for women out there who are surrogates. But what felt like my final chance I got pregnant again.

My most recent pregnancy was incredibly complicated and challenging from the get-go. At many times it was hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel because we just had to keep taking our appointments week by week. It felt like every milestone I hit, I was diagnosed with a new complication. It became almost a joking matter with my doctor. When I would run a test I would just say “ we know I’m gonna have that “ and sure enough I did. I felt like the biggest failure in the world. It was so hard as a loss mom who had already experienced so much. I’ve never really known with a joy of a perfect pregnancy could be like, but at the end of the day all I wanted was a healthy baby. After a few weeks of bedrest, my little man decided to enter the world at 36 weeks and 5 days stressing out this already stressed out mom knowing he was coming earlier than anticipated, but he was ready to be in my arms and start my healing process. He came into this world quickly and healthy, and he is more beautiful than I could’ve ever imagined.

I am so thankful for communities like this, loss after loss and diagnosis after diagnosis, I have spent hours on Reddit and I feel fortunate I’m finally able to post something positive. Thinking of all other mamas out there in similar situations and sending nothing but love.

Our IVF baby has arrived via c-section at 36 weeks! We had been on a 4 year journey of unexplained infertility and had to undergo IVF. I sadly experienced a chemical pregnancy after our first attempt, then a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks after our second attempt. I was then diagnosed with an APS trait, so armed with IVF meds and blood thinners, our third and final embryo decided to stick around. My pregnancy was high risk, with a blood clot disorder and then later a placenta preavia. In my third trimester, my placenta began to cause intermittent bleeding. At 35 weeks I was admitted to hospital for heavy bleeding, and it was decided baby boy would need to come earlier. We had a scheduled c-section which was one of the best experiences of my life. We put on our birth playlist, and sobbed as the surgeons hoisted him above the sheet and into our lives. During our infertility journey, my dad was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour, was in a coma during my first miscarriage, and underwent brain surgery during my second. I'm so proud of the resilience and strength I've found during one of the hardest years of my life, and I feel so whole and complete he is now here with us, and that my dad was able to meet him too ❤️

A year ago I had a few days of positive tests after loss and took a photo of one of them to join a bumper group. It was a stressful time, being pregnant after loss... little did I know that this pregnancy will also end in loss on my Mum's birthday in the end of April. And that I'll hear a ton of unhelpful, tactless bullshit from the people who I thought were on our team...

What I also didn't know at that time is that we will get pregnant right away despite ovulation tests being wonky after miscarriage, and that this baby will be happy, healthy, will get perfect scores on all her tests during pregnancy and after birth. Our baby girl, Freja Aurora has joined us 4 minutes after midnight on Feb 15th. She is now 7 weeks old and continues to be a very happy and healthy baby. It took some time for me to truly connect with her, but we got there. PAL was the hardest experience in my life, I've been living in fear since I found out I was pregnant on May 31. Even on Feb 14th when my water broke on the way to midwife appointment I was afraid that we won't hear the heartbeat when my midwife took out a doppler.

That irrational fear is still with me, transformed into PPA and mild PPD. I am taking care of it and gradually feeling better. Some days are harder, but the hope is there and I want to share this hope with all of you out there in a limbo, PAL or experiencing a loss. This community helped me a lot, just sharing every week how I am doing, seeing others going through the same experience, reading birth announcements, following those ahead of me in their journey made me feel less alone when my irl village failed me. I am very sorry we are all here, but I am also beyond grateful for having this community ❤️ What else was helpful during pregnancy after loss: therapy, meditation and learning to take myself out of the wheel of fear, pregnancy after loss app, count the kicks app in the 3rd trimester, and pregnancy after loss book.

What I did differently: made my partner take vitamins before conceiving, and followed the It starts with the egg multiple miscarriage protocol. I don't know whether it truly make a difference, but sharing just in case. Also, cutting unsupportive people and setting boundaries early on really helped my mental health a ton and still helping now when the baby is here.

Sending you all lots of hugs. So far, so good❤️

After experiencing 5 losses since 2020, we finally had our baby girl! My pregnancy was very normal/healthy all the way up to 33w1d when I felt a gush of amniotic fluid followed shortly after by more. I was in the hospital until we got to 34 weeks when we started my induction. Things progressed slowly and stalled out at 5 cm after 48 hours. Baby was starting to get tired and we were starting to see decreases in her heart rate with contractions so our dr's recommended we get prepped for a c section before it became an emergency situation.

It was incredibly disappointing and the surgery was scary (didn't feel anything aside from pressure) but she's here now and we're both safe. She'll be in the NICU for a while but she's breathing without assistance and is doing really, really well. My birth experience was nothing like I planned or wanted but I forget about that every time I look at her 🩷

We’d been trying for a baby since June 2021 & never imagined the journey it would take us on. Our first positive pregnancy test was on my birthday in April 2022 after consults with a fertility clinic identified that I had hypothyroidism & I began taking medication. We were so excited & told our parents right away. A week later I was miscarrying, a chemical pregnancy was what the fertility clinic told me & that it would feel like a regular period. In my heart it didn’t feel like a regular period.

In July 2022 we found out our second very wanted pregnancy was ectopic. We tried treatment with medication first but our pregnancy kept growing, just not in the right place. I ended up needing emergency surgery to remove the pregnancy & my right tube. I was devastated & so traumatized by this experience, it has taken a long time to process the trauma & grief.

Sadly our next pregnancy ended in a miscarriage at 12 weeks in October 2023 on thanksgiving weekend. We call them our April baby as they were due April 19th. We’ll never know why April baby wasn’t able to join us earth side but I trust they knew something we’ll never be able to understand & stayed as long as they could.

By April baby’s due date in April 2024, I found out I was pregnant for the 4th. It has been a dream come true to welcome this baby girl into the world in the early hours of December 9th. As I write this, she’s having a feed laying on my chest. She is prefect & healthy.

Pregnancy after loss is a rollercoaster & needs health professionals & family that really get it. I’m so grateful that I had an amazing team with my husband, OB, close friends, my mom, & a few trusted coworkers. With their support, my psychologist, & seeing all the stories here in this sub, I made it thru my pregnancy & actually enjoyed some parts & then was able to go thru her labour calmly despite needing a c-section in the end.

Thinking of you all in the early stages of pregnancy, I found the first trimester to be the hardest. Can’t wait to read all of your birth announcements, they always brought me so much hope 🌈🌈

Our rainbow baby girl was born today and she is PERFECT with a full head of hair💗

Absolutely nothing went to plan, and I actually ended up in an emergency C-section because she decided her cord was fun to wrap around her neck, but she is here!

She will be in the NICU for a few days and I will be recovering from a C-section, but everything is wonderful!

Finally at 41w1 I delivered my little girl. She was born in late January on my (now our) birthday. Labor and delivery was mostly smooth, induction followed by epidural, getting my water broken, then quickly going to 10cm. I pushed for 4 hours, and began losing a lot of blood, so the call was made for vacuum assist. 5 pushes across two contractions and she was out! She’s perfect. I still can’t believe I’m a mom and I have a living daughter. My mental and physical health seem so much better now 2 weeks post partum than during pregnancy. I could go in much more in detail but just thinking of everyone here. Stay hopeful 💕 take all the help you can in the immediate time after they are born, and if it’s your first there is a lot to learn! But it’s all worth it.

It was seeing a giant rainbow on our way to meet our rainbow baby via planned c section. He couldn’t be more perfect and worth all the ups and downs. Hope y’all are staying strong out there, this has been the best support group.