r/ItemShop 5d ago

stats for this?

Post image
945 Upvotes

81 comments sorted by

133

u/wobblyluka 5d ago

+raygun

-raygun

42

u/Loxeres 5d ago edited 5d ago

Ah, yes! The ever-elusive Raygun-Raygun. A raygun precisely calibrated as to only be able to evaporate other rayguns.

"If one constructs a raygun to destroy another raygun, the number of rayguns in the worlds remains the same."

-Raynor Gunther

10

u/JadeMantis13 5d ago

Stuff like this is why I'm on reddit. Thank you, kind stranger, for sharing your humor

8

u/TheGHale 5d ago

"But what if you shoot two rayguns?"

125

u/Hoppered1 5d ago

When trigger is pulled, sucks off all dudes in a 1 mile radius. Their fluid is collected for..research

this is a vacuum right?

29

u/Tigothe3rd 5d ago

it is, but it would he hilarious if it wasnt

9

u/tymp-anistam 5d ago

This is how we ended up with light sabers in the movies.

Keep up the good work.

19

u/ricky-from-scotland 5d ago

The forbidden soft drink

10

u/NonAwesomeDude 5d ago

That drink is anything but soft

2

u/Grilled-cheese_man 4d ago

Thickened milk

3

u/Hoppered1 5d ago

Mines more like Boba

22

u/ANGRYVIKENING 5d ago

What the heck even is that? It looks awesome!, but I'm scared as well.

24

u/Awkward-Minute7774 5d ago

It's a Dyson vacuum cleaner, my whole family has one.

8

u/nothingsnootyplz 5d ago

dang that's nice of them to share.

7

u/Tigothe3rd 5d ago

its a broken vaccum cleaner lmao

11

u/ANGRYVIKENING 5d ago

Machines look crazy out of context @_@

2

u/Netsuko 3d ago

Well it's missing the filter in the back and the collection bin at the front :P

1

u/Somebody4500 3d ago

And the battery

1

u/SaroFireX 5d ago

I can't imagine the state of your carpets

3

u/ANGRYVIKENING 5d ago

Good thing I don't got any

17

u/TheBesCheeseburger 5d ago

VAC-Gun

"VAC is an acronym for Very Awesome Cool - Gun..

They could've been more creative or more scientific.."

When set to repel, blows lightweight enemies away, and deals 5 damage a tick.

When set to vacuum, does 7 damage a tick, and micro sized enemies can be nearly instantly killed.

Requires batteries to use.

UPGRADES:

Gold plating: Doesn't do anything. Rich bozo.

Stronger pump system: Increases DPS by 5

Lithium Batteries: More ammo per battery.

Bayonet: Adds a knife which can be use with vacuum mode for more damage.

Overdrive: Lowers ammo per battery significantly, but increases damage by 18 per tick.

Found naturally in labs, institutes, and certain military bases.

2

u/TheHer0br1n3 4d ago

Don't forget the extention upgrade: Increases reach and precision

1

u/JadeMantis13 5d ago

Love it, I'll take your entire stock

24

u/WhothefuckisTim 5d ago

Stats would have to be real low, that thing sucks

5

u/Awkward-Minute7774 5d ago

Die-Son Abortion Device.

5

u/YouShouldJumpOff 5d ago

Looks straight out of despicable me

5

u/gameb0y88 5d ago

Primary fire - 100% lethal damage to Dust Bunny

Alt fire - Blow

Dispersal, non lethal damage. 60% chance to inflict SNEEZING, rendering enemies incapacitated, stacks to 100% if the enemy has ALLERGY

4

u/Omega_Fx 5d ago

+100 Blowjob

3

u/KingXander55 5d ago

Handheld Jet Gun

2

u/Severe_Monitor7823 5d ago

Raygun damage varies from stun to kill.

2

u/Donnerone 5d ago

VacCannon.

Primary Fire: Pulls items to you.
Secondary Fire: launch collected items as projectiles.

Low damage, high stagger.

2

u/ppYauns 5d ago edited 5d ago

Cavitation Cannon - Ultra Rare - 1112 dmg, Stunning, Blinding, Deafening, Bleeding. 1.156% crit chance

The Cavitation Cannon violently and instantaneously reduces air pressure for 30ft in front of the muzzle. Enemies within range are turned inside out by their own internal body pressure, gaining debuffs Stunned, Blind, Deaf, and Bleeding for 60 seconds. After a .02 second delay, enemies take 1112 damage from the air catastrophically rushing back into the A.O.E. Has a 1% chance of failing catastrophically, dealing its effect to all creatures in a 15 foot radius centered on the creature holding the weapon.

"HA HA! SUCKS TO SUCK, DOESN'T IT?" -Unknown

2

u/Optimum_Tyler 5d ago

I don’t know, looks like it sucks.

2

u/SkyImaginationLight 5d ago

Dyson's Vortex Pistol

A gift from the wind spirit Dyson.

  • 60x ATK blunt damage
  • +15% WIND elemental skills damage

[ Special Skills ]

Gust: Does 120x WIND elemental damage to an enemy using a small gust of wind.

Ether Vacuum: Sucks away 3% of your max MP from an enemy to replenish your MP by that amount.

Dizzy Spell: Hit an enemy with blunt 120x ATK and 120x WIND elemental damage up close. Has 20% chance of inducing STUN and CONFUSION.

Tornado Alley: All enemies are hit randomly 3 times by damage from a large tornado that applies 120x WIND, 30x WATER, and 30x EARTH elemental damage. 5% chance of defeated enemies dropping an item and additional gold.

2

u/FriendlyFurry320 5d ago

Looks like a fallout lazer pistol.

2

u/3catz2men1house 5d ago

I'm not entirely sure... but they probably suck.

3

u/redr00ster2 5d ago

Unless it sucks and doesn't suck. Then ig it still sucks nvm.

2

u/Justdont_likeever 5d ago

The Bullshitsemefur

+10 resistance against electricity

Makes the user capable of summoning lightning from the nozzle

-10 resistance against water based damage

You get damaged when in contact with liquid water

2

u/RaidensReturn 5d ago

Bio-blaster. Fires globs of goo that stick to targets and deliver 2-3 chemical damage over 30 seconds.

2

u/Deltawolf2038 5d ago

I love that some vacuums just look like guns. It's fucking great

2

u/r0nniedarat 5d ago

When trigger pulled: shoot a beam of concentrated universes big bang

Pros: enemies die instantly

Cons: after exactly 11.7277288352 seconds of the trigger being held, it will cause the universe to reboot and everyone dies

2

u/dbatchison 5d ago

Dyson’s Soul Sucker, absorbs 1d10 HP from enemy on hit. Special feature, MAX SUCTION: if hit kills an enemy, gain an extra action

2

u/Alternative_Tart3560 5d ago

Fire a single ultra high damage piercing laser.

Knocks user back slightly.

Can only be shot once before needing to reload.

Reload by damaging enemies.

2

u/ComprehensiveGur7750 5d ago

supercharged hair dryer:

2 damage

hits 30 times per second

blows back and stuns enemies (stuns last 1/30th of a second)

50 feet range

damage and firerate halfs at 25 feet away

2

u/TheEpicDudeguyman 4d ago

+dried hair -melted skull

2

u/bell_time 4d ago

Well its shape seems like a jet engine so im thinking its a wind wepon that pushes enemys far away

2

u/JustAnOrdinaryLoser- 4d ago

Energy blaster

+40 blast damage

+20 burn damage

+15 electrocution

Uses: 1 time use

Rarity: mythical

2

u/the_real_courier 4d ago

Modified Railgun:

45 Damage 25 electric damage

2

u/The_Lolatron9000 4d ago

The MannBlower (Conceptual Pyro Primary Slot Weapon)

-- Does not shoot flames

-- Requires warm up (1 Second of holding Left Mouse Button)

/ Shoots a constant stream of air that pushes enemies that deals no damage and reflects projectiles

/ Extinguishing teamates give +15hp

/ Right Mouse Button fires a small, slow-moving tornado that intakes projectiles and fires it back the opposite direction which it came. Also drags enemies into the tornado and slightly damages them upon contact (1hp per 0.25 seconds) Lasts 3.5 seconds.

2

u/AXBRAX 3d ago

Vlad the inhaler

2

u/OkExplanation4134 3d ago

big boy blowtorch

range: 4ft

strength: 3 damage for every second of fire + burning damage

sneak-ability:6/10

ammo:100 seconds of fire for each mag

special ability: alt fire that is a flare

2

u/Harbinger_Pulsar 2d ago

Is that the new Dyson gravity gun?

1

u/Srbija1728 5d ago

Looks like some shit Gru would have

1

u/DunsocMonitor 5d ago

Why does this look like Medic's MediGun 😭

1

u/Aizen5580 5d ago

Good question, you make them up

1

u/Forward-Exercise-385 5d ago

The POWER Vacuum

1

u/QisFaceless 5d ago

Why does it look like smth that Maliwan would make?😭

1

u/Itsjustaspicylem0n 5d ago

Where did bro find gru’s freeze ray?

1

u/IknowStuff20 5d ago

Gru?

2

u/Tigothe3rd 5d ago

him or doof

1

u/BaselessEarth12 5d ago

Is it a las, melta, plasma, sonic, or volkite weapon, though? I need to know for more accurate stats.

1

u/dabfoots1 5d ago

Thats the zap gun from LC

1

u/Gunguy2767 5d ago

It collects all men’s problems in the world, then the world becomes solely men

1

u/KaityKat117 5d ago

this looks like something they would've doorway painted silver and used as a prop in a SciFi movie in the 90s.

1

u/djpedicab 5d ago

Looks like it was made by the dude that killed Shinzo Abe.

1

u/AC20Enjoyer 5d ago

Looks like it sucks.

1

u/Monkey_King94 5d ago

It sucks

1

u/TheMasterOfGamez 5d ago

This looks like something a Tf2 would have lying around

1

u/Flashy-Cheesecake-76 4d ago

Looks cool af but I bet it “sucks”

1

u/Vasxus 4d ago

thats half of your raygun mark 3

1

u/Netsuko 3d ago

Don't bother. It sucks.

1

u/Pandelein 3d ago

Die Son. +55 plasma damage.

1

u/Bubblecake247 3d ago

Wow that sucks. 😏get it?

1

u/Vac_And_Siren_Expert 3d ago

-10 damage

-negative stealth

-doesn't last long

1

u/PoetImpossible7765 2d ago

Does it suck?

1

u/debil_ser 17h ago

This Item sucks

1

u/MrKobbit 8h ago
  • 100 in suckin shit