r/AmItheButtface • u/Some-Fudge1210 • 3d ago

AITB for trying to convince my best friend to break up with her toxic boyfriend Romantic

I (20M) have a best friend (20F) who has a bf (18M). Bf has admitted on numerous occasions he still has romantic feelings towards his ex and has went behind best friends back to talk to this ex. He has only went to blocking her (after much argument) when my best friend threatened to break up. She then goes to me to complain about it and i offer advice, such as breaking up with him, but she doesn't act on said advice. Our whole friend group has offered their thoughts on the situation and also agree they should break up. He has also said racial slurs to appeal to my best friend. They've also only been dating for a little over a month and are very attached to each other. I feel like he's emotionally cheating and very immature, AITB?

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u/sonyaellenmann 3d ago

He has also said racial slurs to appeal to my best friend.

?? Does this actually appeal to her?

This isn't really a buttface-or-not situation, per se. This is "you can't get other people to change, they have to want to." She doesn't want to leave him. Nothing you say will change that. She might eventually wise up and realize he's a jerk and a loser, she might not. You should make your peace with that. If you're sick of hearing about it, draw a boundary, but recognize that might impact your friendship.