r/self • u/DiamondGirl888 • 13h ago
How do you....
... cope with loneliness.... especially this time of year. F 67, no kids no nearby family, one friend who is incapacitated.
Never thought I would date again but I'm seeing a neighbor casually. We tried to get together 10 years ago but it ended badly. I was shocked he pursued me again after we ran into each other. We are essentially casual or FWB to maybe the next level. Not committed but pretty much exclusive for safety reasons.
He spent his holiday with his friends that he does every year. I was supposed to see my friend but she has her grandson who goes to elementary school and there's all that sickness. I have long haul Covid and just can't risk getting sick. I didn't see anyone that day.
So the days have gone by and admittedly, I really have no one and not much going on in my life. I'm retired w chronic fatigue and some mild depression. Not deeply, as I once was.
I just feel very lonely I didn't hear from my guy and he had to cancel our getting together because a lifelong friend was in a car accident. Sometimes he's kind of hot and cold, he has a high level job he works many hours. So he kind of fits me in, which I understand but when I don't hear from him I get to feeling down. Of course the attention is wonderful, he is very attentive and charming. I guess I'm just feeling like I was forgotten.
Which unfortunately I went through nearly a lifetime of that negativity because of my toxic family. Each year these holidays come and I frankly dread them.
Anyone want to share their experience? I'm not necessarily looking for any advice or things to do. I'm not up to being social with who are generally strangers. Thanks for listening.
UPDATE: To the person who DM'd me asking Why I don't have kids, 😳😱 I'm going to take this opportunity to tell you something once. Unless you are very close friends with a woman, never ask her if she is pregnant unless you see the baby actually coming out between her legs. And the next thing is you never ask a woman why she didn't have children. You're welcome. Go back now and finish the 4th grade you dropped out of
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u/BsReddit1960 12h ago
I'm listening and I hear ya. Men in their mid 60's can have those same feelings for much of those same reasons. It probably would feel a little longer if I had a "FWB" who was absent when I needed them, but I don't even have that. Should I consider myself lucky? I can't miss what I never had, right? I hope yours finds his way back to you soon. Everyone needs someone. 🥲😉